The funeral draws something out of me.
From the fact that no one in the Finn household seemed to care that my grandmother had died, down to Malachi’s nonchalance about her death and his sustained anger at what happened with Skye.
My heart throbs and aches while I have to carry out the preparations for the funeral myself and the day comes on a windy morning.
“You should eat something, Antonia.” The concerned voice from behind me says but I can’t seem to hear it. Another voice comes, “You look stressed, Antonia, and…. This isn’t the time to stop eating. You’ll get over this.”
I nod dully as memories of my grandmother come back to me.
Memories of her braiding my hair, then loosening it out to brush it again. She’d tell me often of how she’d met my grandfather. How he’d loved her and pursued her endlessly for her love. How they both ran away from home, to start a new life in the city, and how they’d lived content lives in their small house.
A tear rolls down my cheek because I promised to take her all over the world.
I promised her we’d see France together, that we’d wink scandalously at handsome Spanish men, that we’d laugh and live, bright and happy, and that she would see me in a happy marriage. That…
That I'd have a husband that loved me, and respected me.
More tears drop from my eyes but I wipe them, keeping a sob in as I move to the coffin and gaze at the face of my grandmother once more. Her expression is now one of rest, and I smile at that, happy to believe that she is at rest. My smile wobbles as I put her favorite things into the coffin.
Her favorite knitted sweater. Her best shoes. Her photobook.
A hand lands on my shoulder and I turn to find out who it is, but I already do immediately his voice speaks.
“I’m sorry for your loss, Antonia.”
My eyes meet with metallic gray ones, and I look away once again as my eyes fill with tears. It’s Tieran Blackstone. Malachi’s uncle, and the only one that shows me any kindness in the Finn household. He’s always a delight to have when he’s around, and amidst the surprise that forms on my lips is a warmth that blooms in me at the sight of him.
“You came.”
Tieran nods and his words ring in my soul when he speaks because of how sincere they sound. “I hate that you’re going through this, Antonia.”
Tieran’s voice is a rich scratchy baritone, and he towers over me, a good bit taller than Malachi. He still has the same features that make heads turn wherever he goes. Startling metallic ash - silver eyes, thick but well kept dark hair, a well sculpted face. Despite myself, I chuckle, feeling a bit of my sadness abate and my breath returns as I look at the coffin. I look at my grandma’s face and find my voice coming back with a surge of bravery. I speak though my voice cracks.
“It’s the way of all life I guess. I’m sure one day we’ll see each other again.”
Tieran’s voice is somber but witty, fitting the mood of a burial as he asks, “In a field of grass and her favorite flowers?”
I chuckle a bit, a sliver of genuine laughter coming from my lips as I think about it, “No. My grandmother wouldn’t agree to meet me there.” I sigh wistfully as I think on it, “She’d have loved the Eiffel tower. Or that hotel you own in Cape Verde.”
There’s amusement in his tone as he asks, “The Immaculate?”I nod and respond with a wry smile on my li[ps, “That very one”.I reach out to close the lid of the coffin, the action slow, but steady, because she can be laid to rest now. I wish her goodbye with a whisper on my lips, “Till we meet again.”
The graveyard is empty, except for the headstones, me, and the men with shovels. Only I and some of my friends were around for the ceremony, but I didn't let them put her in just yet. I still wanted a few more moments with her.
“I dragged someone here along with me to see you.”
Tieran’s rough scratchy voice sends shivers down my spine, but when I turn to look at him, his dull silver eyes already tell me I know about who he’s brought.
Just a few paces behind us, Malachi stands, a hand in his pocket, sunshades on though the day is anything but sunny. He doesn’t even make an attempt to come near me. Tieran speaks again, “I apologize on behalf of my family Antonia, for their behavior, especially during this time of your life.”
I ask with a feeling of anger and bitterness in my chest, “What was HIS excuse for not coming?”
I don’t know why I ask the question, just that it sets a low flame of anger burning in my heart to see him here. Tieran’s response is one I already expected, “Sienna heard of the argument you had with Skye, and forbade him from coming.”I scoff, because I already knew Sienna Finn does not like me. She’s never liked me since the moment I got married to her precious son. Yet if it was Skye’s dog that died, Malachi would be at its funeral. They would all be at its funeral.
Tieran opens the umbrella in his hand and hands it over me the minute the rain starts to shower. He excuses us, and Malachi opens his too and begins to walk away towards the receiving hall, but I shout his name out, the wind doing nothing to cool the feelings burning inside me.
“Malachi!”Malachi stops, and a question falls off my lips immediately, my tone shaky and hurt, “Why?”
Through all the pain I have endured in the past few days, I know he could have been there for me if he wanted to. Though I already know what could have held him back, I also know if he wanted to, he could have come here.
I ask again, my voice braver this time, “Why weren’t you here at the funeral?”
Malachi’s gaze goes to glower, because he hates being spoken to like this, least of all by me. I watch as he walks forward and stretches a bouquet of roses out to me.
“For your grandmother. I had some work to attend to.”
There’s a lack of emotion on his face and there’s still a price tag on the bouquet. I take it from him and fling it away as far and as fast as I can.
My body turns shaky, and maybe it’s because of the answers I need, maybe it’s because of the pain I've been feeling, but the umbrella in my hands falls and tears slide down my cheeks as I ask him, “Why do you hate me, Malachi?”
He goes rigid and doesn’t respond but I ask again, “Why do you hate me, Malachi! Is it because I got married to you?”
Malachi turns and heads into the funeral home, and I stand there, multiple emotions running through me, because I'd entertained the thought that he’d filed for a divorce. If he had it would have made sense.
No one treats a person they’re married to this way.
I shed a few tears in the rain but I clean them up, and once inside the hall, Teiran helps me distribute the rest of the gifts I had packaged. I planned to take all of them over to an orphanage home nearby and distribute them, but Tieran invited people over. He literally dragged the men he was meant to have a meeting with today, and brought them to my grandmother’s funeral.
Notable business moguls from all around the world sit in the small receiving room of the cemetery. They smile at me, and they all wish me their sincerest condolences, before accepting the gifts and taking their leave.
I give Tieran a conspiratorial look, my heart beating with a strange strange kind of gratefulness, a look to which he responds with a grin and a chuckle. Malachi sits at one side of the room chatting with a lady who promptly takes her leave after a cold look from Tieran.
When Tieran goes out to pick a call, Malachi finally makes his way to me in the hallway and the look on his face is bland and cold as he speaks, “I’m sorry for your loss, Antonia.”
I note the passive aggressiveness in his tone. The clench in his jaw from being forced to witness my outburst. My response is clean and clinical, lacking any emotion and being as frank as possible, “I don’t much see why you care. Move, Malachi.”
The response rocks him off his feet.
“Did you just speak to me like that?”
This time I walk past him. His shoulders might be broad but they’re not broad enough to occupy the whole hallway. Malachi follows me to the main hall and glares at me from the entrance to the hallway. I sit on one of the seats, a light headache roaring through my head as I glance at him and his wrathful expression.
His black suit is tailored to perfection, but I can't even bring it up in me to notice that in a good way. The sight of him is like a sore to my eyes. His voice and tone are tight when he speaks,
“I’ll understand that you’re hurting, Antonia, but under no circumstances should you speak to me like that again. I’m your husband.”
I scoff. His phone rings and he picks it up. His eyes are cold when he sets them on me and his tone dismissive and glum when he cuts the call and speaks, “I have something important to attend to.”
I nod as I ask, “Is it important, or is that the new name you’ve reserved for Skye and the baby she’s carrying for you?”
Malachi doesn’t even have the decency to look shocked.
His jaw tenses in annoyance and he grits out again, “Don’t talk to me like that.”
I keep my tone relaxed as I respond, “Why?”
“I’m your husband!”
The sound of his bellow rocks through the room, and the old Antonia would have felt sad. The old Antonia would have felt intimidated. I lock my eyes with his and I stare into his cold heartless soul as I respond, “Not anymore, Malachi Finn.”
I see light confusion cloud Malachi’s face but I continue regardless, “I’ve filed for a divorce.”
“You don’t care about me. You don’t have any regard for our marriage. I was foolish to ever think my love could change you, so I'll be speaking to you however I want from now on.
You can leave.”
Malachi’s pov. “I’ve filed for a divorce.” I storm into the office and thoughts of Antonia saying she’s filed for a divorce flash through my mind. I grunt in anger as I drop my phone and settle into my chair. Antonia… Antonia would never behave like this. I understand she’s angry at her grandmother’s death. I'm not totally irrational, but I didn't know her grandmother would die. If she’s making decisions like this because she lost a loved one…. No, Antonia would never behave like this. Not to me. My door comes open and a worker walks in. A female. I watch as she goes about, oblivious to my presence. I watch to better confirm if this is being done out of nefarious intentions or not. When I see it’s not, I speak, “I have a question to ask you.” At the sound of my voice I hear her breathing go silent. She definitely knows who’s speaking. When she turns her face is devoid of all color and her response is less than chirpy, it’s shaky and intimidated, “Mr Finn. How may I assis
Antonia’s pov. I spend the night in another room and I don't know if Malachi notices my absence nor do I care. I take a visit to the cemetery, just to see my grandmother’s grave for one last final time, and when I come back every bone in my body hurts. It’s the familiar hum of fatigue and tiredness and as it surges through me, it reminds me that I'm pregnant too. A light headache whips through my head, but I ignore it and head straight to the room. I’m not staying here for another minute. At the thought of Malachi, something in my heart seems to begin burning, and I can't deal with that. I don’t want to see him. I take one last look at the room that we’ve both shared for the past three years and different images flash past behind my eyes. Images of both of us, on that bed. Passion being the one thing that brought us together. Yet even then, I'd just been deluding myself into thinking he loved me. That he had sex with me because he wanted it as much as I did. I go to the walk
I walk over to my bag and continue with packing.I feel Malachi’s glare. Every bit of it in all its righteous indignation and a thrum of pain surges in my heart. He puts the flowers down, embarrassment visible on his face. I briefly entertain the hope that he’s embarrassed because he’s finally come to his senses and realized his actions as a husband these past few years have been nothing to write home about.Malachi shatters my expectations once again, “The flowers weren’t for you anyways, and where do you think you’re going?”I chuckle bitterly to myself because it’s obvious he’d rather drown than admit to himself he hasn’t been perfect.I place the jade necklace into my bag and reach under the pillow to pull out the papers I'd placed there this morning. A twinge of embarrassment courses through me because the better option would have been to drop it onto the bedside table. He’s always complained about how unprofessional it is to keep things under the pillow for him to find, and see
The first thing that goes wrong is the weather. The skies had been moody on my visit to the cemetery but now they’re dark and are hanging heavy with rain. I drag my suitcase down the road looking for a taxi but I should have known I would never get one here. The Finn mansion isn’t located in just any part of the city I seek solace under a small canopy and feel tears sliding down my cheeks in frustration. Malachi’s words, and his mom’s taunts…. No one should be treated that way. For all my years in the Finn house, I've been nothing but respectful to Sienna, I've always been silent at tables because of her. Malachi thinks I can't live without that? He thinks I can't live without him treating me like less of a human than he would others?A sudden honk snaps me out of my thoughts and water splashes on me immediately. I gasp, my yell stuttering from shock and surprise. I was clearly by the side of the road. Anyone with two eyes would have seen me. The car that had splashed me with wa
I wake up in the comfort of a soft bed, and I snuggle into it because every part of my body hurts. I groan softly, and moan as I find a better spot that accelerates the comfort I feel. The first thing that makes me know something is weird is the scent of this bed. It’s a scent that makes me want to bury my nose into the bed and breathe more of it. It’s minty. Earthy. Musky. This isn’t what my bed smells like, then I open my eyes, and fear goes through me. I’m in a strange room I look around to see it’s large. It’s sparsely but tastefully furnished. The room radiates power and restraint at the same time. More than that it’s a room I've never been in before. I jolt when I hear a rich dark voice call out my name, “Antonia.” I whip my eyes to its direction immediately, and a confusing sight meets me because standing right there at the door, is Tieran, Malahchi’s uncle, with a steaming cup of tea in a saucer in his hands and a concerned look in his eyes. Tieran crowds the entryw
The sun shining in through the window annoys me. The documents in my hands infuriate me. A light headache slams into my head each time I look at any of the letters, and yet when I stretch my hand to the side of the table, there’s no tea there like there would have been.It sets something off in me and dropping my pen is the only thing I can do not to break it. I drop the cooperation deal too.The lack of tea isn’t the problem, I've sent out about six cups in irritation and anger already because they weren’t made right.A building filled with over a thousand people and no one is competent enough to make a fucking cup of tea!It’s been two days now since Antonia’s left and she isn’t back. Not even after I'd ensured half the city never opens its doors to her. I don’t understand it.She couldn’t have dissolved into damn thin air could she! She has to be hiding somewhere.The door to my office opens again and I do not bother to look at who’s coming in. It’s probably another idiot worker w
Antonia’s pov.“So this person is your mentor?”Tieran gives me a singular look and chuckles right after before he nods his head. We’re in his kitchen right now, and I don't know what I expected. Okay, I expected luxury and a dozen fancy bowls that do nothing but just be there for some special occasion that never comes. Tieran’s kitchen IS luxurious, but oddly it’s functional too. It’s obvious there’s been little to no female interference though, or maybe she’s just not like me and likes her spoons in a drawer where her hand can’t reach them.I take a scoop of the little soup Tieran has prepared and let it melt off my tongue. He knows what I want. He just won’t tell me because he says I should eat first. I know a thing or two about being insistent though so i go on, “There must be a backstory behind that. The famous wildly successful CEO of various multi billion dollar corporations, having a mentor?”Tieran smirks and I like the way he only does so with just one sharp angle of his li
“You’re probably wondering why I keep looking at you like that.”I sit on the seat Tieran has pointed to me and there’s a strange feeling that crawls up my spine again when I feel Tieran’s mentor returns his gaze to me. He looks like an aged and solemn man yet sits like a man who knows his worth despite his condition, but has also been lonely for so long. When he looks at me; I see some of my features plainly on his face. The color of his eyes, the slight raise of his nose…My heart begins to race and I fall short of breath. I keep myself under control so I won't embarrass myself, or Tieran. His mentor’s voice is solemn when he continues speaking.“I lost something special some years ago, a very long time ago to be sincere. I have been guilty of that loss since the day I realized it. I couldn’t do what had to be done to keep it, and I thought I could handle that loss, I told myself she was just a stripper after all.” He sounds like he’s beating himself up even as he speaks and a sad l