Canus looks back at me as the door shuts behind Scintilla and Margaret. We both wait, tense as their footsteps fade into the distance. Out of pride more than anything else, I want Canus to go first, to explain himself to me. He’s calm, however, lounging back as if we didn’t start the evening off with me barging into his rooms to demand answers from him. Eventually, I break. I start with something innocuous, but relevant enough, given how my wrist is still marred with a semicircle of drying blood stains. ‘Can you not drink from humans? Is that why you do this to us?’ I know the answer, of course, but I want to hear his excuses again. Surviving on mortals weakens me, he’d said the first time I mustered up the courage to ask him this question. The curse of our bloodline burdens me more than most. His tone had left no room for further questioning. His answer is different this time: ‘I could, for a time, but often not without killing them. As my newborn vigour left me, however, human blo
‘The bloodline curse,’ I whisper in wonder. The blight of my otherwise perfect unlife, yet, if I’m to understand Canus correctly, an unavoidable side effect of its very perfection. Other vampiric bloodlines aren’t as strong as the royal line, but they also don’t suffer our curse. And it’s all because they’ve been using dhampirs to strengthen the bloodline. Canus is both the progeny of the Prince of London and his biological son! It’s all starting to come together. ‘Yes,’ Canus says, nodding. ‘For our line, the weakness manifests as a curse upon our ability to feed, but it’s more complicated than that.’ ‘What do you mean?’ ‘Well, take my grandfather for example, who, according to my father, had only been limited to feeding from men. Then, you have my father and his siblings. My father is limited to feeding from mortal nobility. The Prince of Birmingham, meanwhile, is limited to feeding from artists, and the Prince of Manchester is limited to feeding from those born out of wedlock.’
My blatant emotional manipulation works on Canus. He stops pacing and looks back at me with a stricken expression. ‘I don’t—I mean—no, you’re right. It’s not fair to keep it from you.’ He breathes in, then exhales in something akin to a long sigh, but it’s not the sigh that I’m used to. It’s not disappointed or exasperated, but instead tremulous. Almost like if he’s afraid. ‘Alright, it’s like this. As a newborn, my curse was centred on, ah—’ He winces. ‘Sorry, there’s just no other way to phrase it: I was more or less limited to virgins—purity in a very archaic sense of the word. I still am, sort of, but the curse worsened when I stopped being a newborn.’ I already knew this, more or less, but still I feel the un-vampire urge to blush. I swallow down my embarrassment and ask, ‘And how did it worsen?’ ‘Now, I am limited to those who are dependent upon me.’ A pause, then I start, ‘How does that even…’ relate? He grimaces. ‘I can’t be certain, of course, but I think the logic might
Canus’s head snaps back to face mine. His eyes, bright silver and burning, peers into my avoidant gaze. ‘What do you mean?’ he asks. ‘I know we were… together, sort of.’ I bite my lip. I was about to say in love, but it seemed a bit presumptuous. I keep our gazes locked and set my shoulders back, faking assurance that I don’t feel. ‘But I also know that the letters stopped at some point. I figured, if you broke things off between us, and if I didn’t want to remember the embarrassment, then maybe, before you turned me, maybe I asked you to let me forget.’ It’s all speculation, and I grow increasingly uncertain as I try to fill in the gaps of what might have happened. And there’s also that last email conversation Aura had with James. It didn’t seem like she’d been very receptive to his calls. That must have annoyed him. I don’t remember ever seeing anyone tell Canus ‘no’. ‘Favilla,’ he says eventually. ‘Please rest assured that, even if it had been an option, I would have never wante
Though I’ve been coasting quite well through my second run at being a newborn (and I now realise that, though I have the mental fortitude of a vampire of three decades, there are still certain physical indications that my body is still new to immortality), Scintilla can’t seem to say the same. I remember her as a mentor figure, a beloved older sister that guided me through those early, tumultuous years of my unlife. She went with me hunting well past my newborn months, regardless of the many duties Canus had tasked her with, citing her position as the eldest as justification for granting her the dubious honour. She stayed with me during the nights that I wanted nothing else but to bury myself in the back garden to get away from all the noise, all the light of London at night. It wouldn’t even be wrong to speak of her as a motherly figure, as opposed to a sisterly one. Now, however… ‘How did you do that?’ she asks me one night as she practises calling forth her witchlights and I prac
Canus ignores my question. ‘Are you still willing to meet her and befriend her?’ he asks, addressing both Scintilla and me. Scintilla was watching me intently, but she returns to looking at the back of Canus’s head at his question. Her answer is slow, carefully considered: ‘If she’ll be a potential sister, then I think I’d rather have a new sister I don’t know all that well than not have a new sister at all.’ ‘Favilla?’ ‘How does surviving the transformation vary?’ I ask again. Canus sighs and turns his key, reviving the car’s idling engine. We drive past the next several city blocks in leaden silence before, finally, he responds, ‘Sometimes the Sire isn’t as careful as he ought to be. Sometimes the newborn isn’t as strong as she needs to be.’ He’s talking around the issue, and I’m more annoyed at him for it than I probably should be, considering how often I do the same to him. Such is the taste of my own medicine, I suppose. We get to the next red light before he finally says, ‘
These past three weeks since Canus’s startling revelations about the bloodline curse, I’ve been turning them over and over in my mind, wondering if what he said was true, if he was lying, why he would lie. The answer is that of course it’s true; there’s simply no point to lying about something like this. But it raises another question. Chiefly, if it’s true, then why hadn’t he told me this last time? It can’t be that he didn’t know, since the theory originated with the Prince’s generation, or even that he wasn’t sure, considering he said that Chryseus had corroborated. It is only here, in the warm light of the café, studying an emotion in his eyes that can only be described as thirst, tinged with a sadness that can only be named regret, all because he’s looking at Scintilla watch the human beside her with growing interest, that I finally understand. You see, in my first life, Canus had preferences when it came to drinking from his progeny. He always preferred the newborns above all,
For the subsequent week-and-a-half, Scintilla seems to go through a metamorphosis. She catches up to me a little in sorcery and surpasses me in most of the more physical aspects of immortality. She’s always been better than me at seeing in pitch dark, but she’s stronger than me now (though I have more experience so I still spar better than she does), and she seems to hear better as well. It’s pretty obvious that she’s finally figured out the trick to her bloodline curse and is gradually beginning to embrace it. And I, too, deliberate on trying to reach a similar epiphany. Before I can corner her for a conversation about it, however, she gets to me about a very different topic. It happens at Katy’s flat. It’s Friday night (or as good as, since it’s barely after midnight). Both her flatmates are out, and Katy herself is, as usual, still at work. She lives modestly, her only luxury being a large collection of first edition encyclopaedias. I’m flipping through one of her rare personal bo