Chapter Thirteen

More than half of my life has been spent trying to prove that I'm also human. The other parts have been spent crying in locked spaces, weeping under basements, pretending to be okay, trying to fit in. Trying to convince the universe that I'm worth it only for it to throw sand and lemons back.

I swear I love the world; I love my classmates, including Vince, Ryan, Sasha, and Edrin; I like them too much. But they don't love me back; Love is a strong word; they don't like me back. I like Maslow High school. The problem is that it doesn't like me back, never has.

A part of me had always thought that if I walked alone if I moved on my own lane, did me such that all my failures were on me, no one would care, no one would notice me and my insecurities. The bullies would forget that I existed, perhaps find new victims or be saved if there is such a thing as saving. Being a lone soldier didn't make me invincible. It made me more visible. It was as if I was always walking with bright red light