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"Are you insane?" Grace attacked, pulling away and keeping me at arms length, running her eyes all over me in scrutiny. It was great to see her face again. She looked beautiful than I remembered.

One month had never felt so long. "I tried every possible way to contact you! God knows I was tempted to come to your house. Why would you think of ignoring my calls. I was so creeped out. I thought if I didn't see you here, I was going to make my way to your house regardless of the circumstances." She pulled away, noticing my reluctance to give her a response.

"You didn't return any of my texts, Ariyah, what's wrong?" She scanned her eyes through me.

I hated for her to walk away like Jane, without knowing the cause of my silence. I breathed heavily, not knowing what to do. I pulled my phone put and typed aggressively, ignoring her worried face.

*I'm sorry but I can no longer talk to you. I have decided to be a mute for the rest of life.* I speed texted her, a little bothered by what she would say.

The school hall was scanty. I could only guess that a few students had made their minds up against coming to school and I would gladly do the same if I were in their shoes but my adamant mom thought it was not a phase worthy to deprive me of my education.

"Ariyah?" She stared up at me from her screen, her voice sounded cracking and I could see that this was obviously heart breaking for her. "But what is this about? You and I know that this is just one of those things." She said, coming closer. I took steps backwards and away from her, rewarding myself with a gasp from her.

"Wow. Ariyah, after everything we've been through to get to this point today?" Her eyes had gone glassy and that pierced my soul. I closed my eyes tight to prevent myself from going weak and showing her how vulnerable I was to these tears.

How could I tell her this was not what I wanted, how could I show her?

"You were my first kiss..." She started. She was mine too. The image from that day struck my memory and bitterness was bore in my heart.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" I furrowed my eyebrows at Grace. I had tried my best to avoid this boring gaze. She had been stealing glances at me while I tried to focus on working on our science project.

*

"Oh no, it's nothing. You've got a little something in your hair that's all." She smiled.

I gasped, I hated to look bad in front of Grace. We had been friends for over a year and all I could care about was that she had found a flaw. Grace was my secret crush and I loved how close we got. I thought it was weird that I was having feelings for a girl but there was no way I could tell this to her since I had no idea what her sexuality was.

It was my deepest secret and my mother would go crazy if she found out what I had done.

At first, I thought it was an hallucination. I had never been attracted to a girl before. But sometimes when she came to my house to call me for basketball practice, I couldn't help but stare at her perfectly firm boobs with attracting nipples sticking through her shirt, she had a no bra policy.

I couldn't keep my eyes away from the way she swayed her buttocks around when she walked. The way her smile light up my mood, I was not concluding yet because I had never been intimate with a girl.

One time she changed in front of me and it made my heart explode. My breathing seized in that moment and life looked appealing.

"Oh my God, is it bad?" I panicked, running my fingers through my hair to find the newly obtained fault, drawing myself back to the reality.

"Here, let me get it for you." She suggested.

I sucked a breath in, closing my eyes as she pulled closer to get her statement done. I feared that she could hear my heart racing fast.

She cupped my cheeks and I automatically assumed that she only wanted nothing but to find a suitable position to get the item out of my hair.

For a second, I was lost when our lips connected. It was so sharp that I could barely tell it was a kiss. It didn't last three seconds but she pulled away, withdrawing as if she had been electrically affected.

Her hands flew up to her mouth and she widened her eyes, "oh my gosh, I'm so sorry, I don't know what I was thinking, I..." I blinked my eyes on repeat as if to assure myself that it was not a dream.

Seeing how nervous she was, in my seated position, I propped myself to my knees and kissed her passionately.

I sucked on her lips like It was not my first time on it. For approaching footsteps of her mother that we had heard, I was sure we would have stayed in that position forever, kissing like our lives depended on it.

The memory caused her bedroom to be my favorite place in the world... it was the beginning of our relationship.

*

"...All that sex? You are going to give it all up for some stupid gas?" She had begun to sob by now. "What exactly are you afraid of?"  She snapped at me in anger, trying to figure the words to say.

Whether or not I had a response, the bell rang in the hallway announcing that we had to head to class.

With one last snort at me, she exited the scene and clutched on to her school bag, her long braids swinging along with her.

I watched in horror as my melanin princess, as I liked to refer to her, left my presence.

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