Finding my way

After the rescue team had disappeared, leaving me in the dangerous middle of nowhere, I had to struggle to find my way back home myself. For the first time, I found it fortunate that life had never been easy on me, and I had survived much more difficult situations than this before. Certainly, if I were some fragile princess, I would sit on the ground and cry my eyes out while trembling in fear. Now my current situation made me more furious than desperate. I even thought that it would be kind of fortunate if I met some perverts or aggressive drunkards on my way back since I could take my anger off on them. Nevertheless, I still hoped to meet someone on the road who would be kind enough to give me a ride to a more civilized place, but judging on my luck that day, chances for that to happen were close to none.

The road was dark and completely empty. I used my phone as a flashlight while walking back from where I ran, cursing my sense of empathy that was constantly getting me into trouble.

"Why the hell did I run so far in the first place?!" I yelled at myself, "I should have demanded that they take me home! After all, if that guy wanted to give me money, why not just give me a ride instead?! Crazy bastards!" I fumed, releasing my frustration.

It took me an additional hour to walk back to a place I could recognize. I was incredibly relieved to find one. Thankfully, I wasn't an idiot enough to take brainless, coincidental turns, and I only ran straight ahead. That saved me from asking for directions from some random strangers in the middle of the night. I even didn't want to think where it would lead me to…

While I was walking, I kept thinking of the empty blood bag those people left on the side of the road. I nervously wondered if they were giving him a blood transfusion in such an unsterile environment. If so, they could have killed him more efficiently than his car accident or his disease! However, the more I thought about it, the more I doubted that they were transfusing blood. They should have done only what was necessary to save his life until he got somewhere to receive treatment…

"Damn it! I should have called that stupid ambulance!" I tormented myself over my decision that I only found more stupid each time I thought about it.

Finally, I got back home. I was exhausted and restless. For some reason, my heart kept pounding. I couldn't stop thinking about my handsome knight with silver hair.

"Lilith, for God's sake! You've done what he asked for! You've paid your dues! Stop torturing yourself! His men are taking care of him, and he is going to be fine!" I scolded myself while looking at my reflection in the bathroom mirror.

I didn't even know why I cared so much about a person I knew nothing about. I didn't even know his name. Yet perhaps my subconscious was desperate to find some sort of comfort and to silence my absurd anxieties. Unknowingly, I took out the black coat he once left me out of the closet. Then I covered myself with it, and just like that, I fell asleep.

For the next couple of days, I unconsciously turned my head around every time I saw an expensive black car passing me by on the street. Maybe, I idiotically thought that I would meet him again.

"This is ridiculous," I mocked myself. "I bet that he was just driving through this town, and seeing him again around here equals the probability of winning the lottery!"

I'd been angry at myself for wasting my thoughts on something as meaningless as thinking about a guy. After all, even if I met him again, it wouldn't change the fact that my whole life was like a permanent escape. Having any kind of relationship was out of the question. That was also the reason why I had never had a lover nor a friend. I had no time for such things. I had even lost my virginity with a person whom I merely thought to be kind, healthy, and whose looks were on a satisfying level. It was a calculated move. I thought that I would decrease my value as an item that my father wanted to sell. Unfortunately, it didn't change a thing. My virginity had never been an important issue in the eyes of the pack. Certainly, as a clueless twenty-year-old, I couldn't have been aware of it.

That was the only time I had ever been with a man. It hurt a lot since he wasn't as gentle as he wanted me to believe he was. I thought I knew what I had decided on, but it was more like rape. When I had felt all the pain, I wanted him to stop, but he didn't. I cried for three days after my one-night-stand had happened. Afterwards, there hadn't been a single day that I thought of having sex with someone. That was why I couldn't believe that all of my senses were going crazy at the mere thought of that silver-haired man…

I had to keep my mind occupied not to think about him. I started taking on new assignments and concentrated on work. Thanks to that, the numbers on my bank accounts kept growing. Soon my lifestyle improved. Although I was on the run, I could select places to live more comfortably and rent bigger and more secure apartments. I stopped hiding in small towns and villages. With my current income, I could afford to move to the town where most of my clients lived, New Argent City.

It was a place filled with prosperous companies and rich people. The prices of the apartments and costs of living there were sky-high. Despite that, everyone dreamt of living there since it equaled being, or soon enough, becoming rich. My most valuable clients had been pestering me to move there for more than half a year. Of course, none of them thought of my comfort. They were all doing their best to recruit me so I could work solely for one of them. They all tried to tempt me with astronomic salaries, cars, or luxury apartments, ignoring the fact that none of them even knew my real name. I bet that they thought that once I moved to New Argent City, I could meet with them and they would have a chance to persuade me… Obviously, I could never take the position they were offering, but the way they talked about the city made me want to live there, even for a short while. After all, it was easier to hide among hundreds of thousands of people than in a town where everyone knew each other…

I found myself an apartment online. It wasn't too flashy, but still well secured and constantly monitored. I made the necessary advance payment, packed my things, and went to New Argent City, excited as never before. I thought that I would live there in safety. I couldn't have been more wrong…