VANCE'S POV
I CLOSE my eyes.
I close my eyes so that Wena's turning away will not be imprinted in my memory like the imprint in my mind of Steven's turning away earlier that is now hurting my heart.
My lips parted when I felt the heartache. I burst into tears.
It hurts so much. I had trouble breathing. I feel something stabbed in my heart that I can't get rid of.
My fists clenched. I opened my eyes. I looked up at the sky and then shouted.
I shouted very loudly. I poured into the scream the weight on my chest that I could not carry for long.
I punched the floor. I poured the anger, fear and pain in my heart into punching.
I hoped it would lessen my feelings but it didn’t.
As I remember what our situation is now, I find it even more difficult. I can see more and more how complicated everything is."Fuck this life!" I shouted as I clenched my fist for the strongest blow I could give to the floor.
SuddVANCE'S POVI BIT my lip as I suppressed my emotions.Tonight I saw the tears of three important people in my life and I don’t want to feel this way.First is Steven, but in the midst of his tears in front of me earlier I saw the courage in his eyes to face it all.Second is Davion, unexpectedly I could see his tears even though it was a bit dark where we were before. I could see the pain and remorse on his face.And now Wena ...My fist clenched.I'm thinking if am I really the right one who need to be next to them now? Am I really the one next to them now?I remember what Steven said earlier before he left me to my friends."Even if this is happening, I want you by my side because you are important to me and that's the reason why you are my source of strength. So it is okay for you to let your friends know that you are here for them, because I know you are also important to them and a friend who can also be a sou
VANCE'S POV"WHO are you?" we both asked.A young man, I think he was in high school. He looks sharp on me. I immediately noticed that he bore a resemblance to Drew so I immediately let go of his arm."Who sent you?!" next to his question.But before I could answer, his fists punched at me again. I avoided them again.I backed away from him and then raised my hand."Wait-"Now his feet also jumped into the air to hit me.Ah! he has no intention of listening to me.I just walk away and back away. I put my both hands in the pocket of my jacket so he could see that I wouldn’t fight, but he didn’t hold back.And he didn’t seem to give up easily to hit me.I can see the fury in his eyes.Anger for an enemy... An enemy that threatens his life and the people important to him...He thinks I'm a spy.His movements are fast. His fists and feet clenched towards me. He was obv
VANCE'S POVMY attention was focused on my cellphone when I felt the car park on the side of the road."Vance I'll just get something, I won't be long. Just stay here," I heard Davion say once he removed his seatbelt.We are now going to the shooting site where we will make a short film. I was the one they took to temporarily replace their cinematographer."Okay," I glance at him once looking out of the car where we stopped.As the door closed my heart pounded when I realized we were in an area close to where I was avoiding going, the building where the wake is held for Drew.We are inside the University. It is still a vacation but many students still come here. Others are due to summer classes, trainings, activities and more like Drew’s wake.Drew had been wake for three days. Our University accepted that the wake of Drew can be held here as a recognition of his good deeds during his lifetime. Many call him a martyr of the people.My cellphone rang for Steven's call. I took a deep br
Vance Pov"VANCE I love you!" Steven shouted at me when I turned my back on him.I stopped.I restrained myself from looking back at him but not my tears.I took a deep breath. I hope the pain I feel goes away.I tried to keep my voice steady, "It doesn't matter," I blinked, "you can go now-""That matters to me!" he pulled on my arm.I was weak so he easily leaned me against the wall. I bowed, hoping he wouldn’t see my tears."That matters to me Vance," he lifted my face.Our eyes met. For the last time. I want to stare at his face, read his eyes and hear his voice more closely.I felt the agony of his will as he took a deep breath.“It’s important to me that you know I love you so much,” he said hoarsely and seriously.I bite my lips.Shit! I can't stop my tears from falling."Why Steven?"You fool! You only hurting me more!"So that I can have ho
VANCE'S POV COLLEGE Days. I thanked the maid who led me to the garden where Wena was. When the maid left, I briefly observed the modern style arrangement of the garden outside. The plants are fascinating before you enter the center of the garden. There are even birds and butterflies flying around. I turned to the garden entrance when I saw Wena with a man. The man caught my attention when I saw his appearance and posture. My heartbeat quickened. I felt butterflies suddenly pop up in my stomach. I don't know why. Maybe, that's the man Wena is talking about who is courting with her now.That she will introduce to us next week. Perfect! Wena's choice is the handsome one! That's my type of man. I felt jealous. If there's one thing I envy about Wena, it's her being a woman that I dream of. For me to be free to love and be loved by a man of my dreams. For me to be accepted by all w
VANCE'S POV "LETS Date-" "I have a date later-" I interrupted what I was saying when I could keep up with what Steven was saying, "so I won't be able to eat with you," I continued in surprise. My voice weakened at the last thing I said, I felt like I wanted to retract what I said. I was devastated when I seemed to catch a glimpse of the pain in his eyes when I said that. I was staring at where I was standing as he stepped closer to me. We were only one step closer when he stopped. I could see his chest lift. "I want to take you out co'z I want you," he stared into my eyes. "For now, lets date first," he whispered and hoarsely. I prayed that he would take back what he said and say it that he was just joking. Go on say it! It was as if I could be deafened by the force of my heartbeat. "You heard me?" he insisted, "I want you." I shook my head and averted my eyes.I took a deep brea
VANCE'S POV "What? Rumor has it on campus what happened to Steven and me? Did the news spread immediately?" I asked in surprise. They all turned to me, wondering why I didn't know that. "I'm sorry, I don't know because after what happened I went home right away. My cellphone broke earlier so I can't update what's going on that I should know." Earlier when Steven punched me and I fell to the ground, my cellphone broke because it was inserted in the back pocket of my pants. They nodded. I turned to Wena, one of the writers of our Publication on campus. "Well, that's one of the things we're talking about right now on our freedom wall on campus and on social media. Because a lot of people are worried about Steven," Wena glanced at me for a moment, "and of course you too. Those guys who's reacting are people who likes you. But more of them likes Steven and his frat members are angry because of the false news they received ab
VANCE'S POV I can’t say that I never thought I would want to taste their body.Wena asked me, what if there was a man who knows that Im a gay and like me then seduce me and undress in front of me as well? What will I do? My only answer. I will walk out of course! I will stand by my position as a man because I am not yet ready to reveal who I am. I didn't hesitate to answer like that because I honestly haven't been able to figure out the man who will do that. But now that I think Steven will undress in front of me just so I can give up? I was swallowed. I felt my face turn red and I felt warm. I close my eyes and feel my chest. I remember Steven applying his hand there earlier. There was some heat in me. I was slowly shivering in my seat when I was suddenly awakened by the heat of the milk that spilled on me when I drank it. I suddenly woke up to the present. I slapped myself. How far was it when I t