1

Sophia always looked up to her older siblings growing up. Whether it be Miles’ mannerism or Pearl’s soundness, she found herself getting inspired. Before she could realise, the slow vibrations of insecurities started emergent within her. Was it her father who prominently praised his older children? Or was it her mother, her siblings’ stepmother, who never failed to remind her of her let-downs?

Her breathes were shallow as she paced back and forth in her room that made her feel claustrophobic regardless of its large size. Her movements were anxious enough to make her stumble over her foot; twice. Hot tears started forming in the corner of her eyes. She craned her neck upwards and closed her eyes, exhaling deeply from her mouth.

Her head snapped towards her phone laying somewhere between the layers of the sheets when she heard it ring. She sprint towards it, finding her device, though not before making a mess of blankets on the floor. She took a seat on the floor beside her bed, resting her back against the night stand, not caring about the handles digging into her back.

 ‘’Pearl,’’ she whispered, her voice low.

‘’what happened? I saw your missed calls,’’ her older sister yawned and Sophia knew she was getting into bed. It was her sister’s thing. She would start yawing at the sight of her bed, given it was also close to midnight. ‘’had a long ass day. You won’t believe it, but Nick said a curse word today. The F word. I wonder where that came from…’’ Sophia heard her husband, Danny, snort and say something about being getting influenced from someone and curious souls.

‘’hm...’’ Sophia listened. She was picking at her nails, also staring at them mindlessly.

 Her long-held silence was a signal that something was wrong. Because it wasn’t very Sophia to give curt replies. So the next thing the older sibling did was start an interrogation.

‘’Something wrong?’’ her voice was the same as she remembered, angelic.

Sophia nodded and shrunk deeper into the corner as if wanting to hide from something. She replied to Pearl with a soft ‘yes’ when she realised how they were on a voice call.

‘’what is it?’’ The sound of a door opening and wind gushing narrated to Sophia that her sister was on the balcony now.

‘’Got my results today,’’ she sniffled. ‘’mom and dad are unhappy again. They said they’re disappointed. I don’t like making them disappointed. I really tried, Pearl, I did…’’ a whimper left her throat. The amount of disappointment they held on their faces made her feel broken. Especially the look of her mother, the livid eyes and the haunting words escaping her lips made her feel so vulnerable. Sophia's parents had grown used to having their two eldest kids always succeeding in their schools and colleges. But Sophia was an exception who could hardly get Bs in her exams.

‘’oh Soph,’’ Pearl’s voice was soft when she spoke. ‘’I know you did your best. It’s just how mom and dad are. It’s either perfect or not. There’s nothing in between. So stop putting so much pressure onto yourself, it’s not worth it.’’

Sophia dragged her knees closer to her chest. ‘’Mom won’t look me in the eye,’’

‘’same,’’

Both the sisters chuckled, finding humour in the dark. It was true. Sophia’s mother would do anything to avoid her step-kids. She saw them grow up yet never felt like birthing a connection. It was always her, Roy, and Sophia in the picture for her dreams.

‘’now I want you to take a deep breath, calm down, and take a break. You need it, baby. Crying only makes you sick, and that’s not something I want my baby sis to go through,’’ Sometimes, Pearl behaved like the concerned mother that Lana refused to be.

‘’I’m 19. Not a kid anymore,’’ Sophia muttered, a smile tugging at the corners of her lips.

‘’still 9 years younger than me though,’’ Sophia could envisage her sister shrug with a dimpled smile. She was also sure that Pearl smiled wider at the sound of her chuckle. ‘’yeah, that sounds better,’’

‘’Thanks, Pearl,’’ she truly was. Talking to Pearl never not lightened anyone’s mood.

‘’You’re welcome. Good night,’’

‘’ ’night,’’

Sophia didn’t make any efforts to move and stayed in the same corner in solace where she once found discomfort. Her mind wandered back to the conversation where Lana told Sophia that her grades had disappointed her and Roy. That she shouldn’t have made planes about the trips with her photographer buddies and instead should have studied a little more. Sophia failed to explain to her mother how that trip to the mountains saved her from going insane from reading those books and video-recorded lectures. Mother would never understand anyway, Sophia thought.

When Roy saw his daughter, lost in her thoughts and with those tear-stained cheeks, he felt his heart ache. He sighed shaking his head. Sure, her grades disappointed him, given he had still not gotten over his older kids always making him proud in their school days, but found the stress burdening on his youngest child unnecessary. He couldn’t convey his thoughts before when having the talk with his wife and daughter, though, he figured he could now.

He walked into Sophia's room and sat beside her on the floor shoulder to shoulder, quietly, only Sophia's soft sniffles being heard occasionally. She refused to acknowledge his presence. He pulled his legs close to his chest like she had and crossed his arms over his knees. He waited for himself to find a way to initiate the conversation. Lana could be ruthless at words and it was one of the traits he didn't like about his wife. But it was a harsh reality that couldn’t be changed easily. And Sophia was always the prey for Lana's outbursts.

''I'm sorry,'' Sophia suddenly broke the silence with an apology. She was clearly in a state of misery. Her medium-length brown hairs falling on the side of her face whilst her eyes were a pinkish shade and were swollen. Damped cheeks and red nose making all of it worse. She didn’t even remember how long she’d been sitting there. 

''Let’s get some fresh air, huh?'' He tried. In response, he got another sniffle and a shake of her head. Roy brushed some hairs out of his daughter's face and tucked them behind her ear to get a better view of her face. ‘‘You’re going to make yourself sick if you won’t stop this,'' he tried again, leaning in towards her.

''What do you want me to do?'' Sophia asked in her now soar voice.

Roy shrugged with a wondering face, looking up at her ceiling, ''I don't know. You tell me, where you want to go?''

''I don't want to go anywhere,'' She replied merely fidgeting with her fingernails. The guilt for disappointing her family was slowly eating her alive. The effects of the conversation with Pearl only lasted for a few moments before her demons started messing with her again.

‘’honestly,’’ Roy cleared his throat and adjusted his butt on the ground before he started wondering why she had to sit on the floor in the first place. He continued, ‘’you shouldn’t be taking your mother's speech so seriously. I know you could have done better. Or maybe this is your limit. You know, everyone is built differently. So I can’t expect you to be the reflection of the twins…’’

''You don't care about it but mom does. She's very mad at me.'' Sophia said quietly. Her defeated voice aching Roy's heart. ''I tried, dad, '' She sniffled.

‘’How about you calm down for a second and try not to think about everything that happened before. Your mother is the way she always was. It’s her tradition now, finding flaws in you –‘’ he paused when he heard a pair of footsteps approaching.

Roy's daughter didn't dare to look at the owner of the interruption whilst he glazed up at his wife. She stood at the door frame of Sophia's room. Arms crossed around her chest and face hard and serious. She walked further into the room and stood in front of them.

''Why are you both sitting on the floor?'' She questioned staring down at them.

Roy stood up towering over Lana. He stared at her with the same sharpness she held. He finally spoke, ''Lana, take it easy on her.'' He tried. But Lana wasn't one bit convinced. She had her own plans mapped.

She looked down at Sophia and demanded ‘’get up,'' Sophia obediently stood up, her gaze not leaving the floor. ‘‘Now look at me,'' She had to tell her. Lana started speaking once Sophia's eyes met hers, ''It is not hard to believe that you've yet again let me down, Sophia. Anyway, why I'm here is to say that what has happened has happened. Now there’s no gain in wailing about it. So please calm down.''

Sophia rose her teary eyes and stared at her mother's looking for some kind of confirmation. She knew that this wasn't it and that something crazy was cooking in her mother's head. Letting go wasn't how Lana worked. She shared a look with her father who gave her a reassuring yet concerned look. She looked back at her mother when she started speaking again.

‘’Now that summer starts, so does your holidays, I won’t allow you to laze around when you can grab an opportunity to learn something new,’’

‘’w-what opp—‘’

Lana interrupted her saying, ‘’an internship.  You’ll do a summer intern—‘’

‘’a summer internship?'' Roy exclaimed cutting her off, clapping his hands together with a growing smile on his face. He looked at Sophia who wasn't very sure about the same. ''Soph, what do you think?'' He ecstatically raised his brows.

''I... I don't know'' She looked at her mom unsure, '' Ma, internship about what? .... And where?'' she questioned.

Lana nodded and spoke, ''At the S-Group.'' On hearing that, the blood drained down Sophia’s face. Despite of the familiarity of that place, working in it felt like a problem that she was in no way prepared neither looked forward to. Not when the CEO was her older brother itself.

~

The guards bowed at Lana as she entered the huge building with Sophia’s hand in hers. She held a serious yet empty look. Whereas Sophia would sweat even at the thought of working at a place like the S-groups. The concept of working under her own brother's supervision wasn't helping either. They got into the elevator and Lana pressed the seventeenth-floor button where Miles had his cabin. It was also on the last floor. When they walked past a few of the employees, they recognised her and her mother and started muttering to one another.

Damn, it had been a while since I walked through these corridors. Sophia thought as her eyes wondered around the halls.

Lana gripped the handle of the glass cabin where Miles was expected. The tinted glass restricted them from knowing who or what was inside. When she almost pulled the door open, a man in dark blue suit attire stopped her. She took a step back and gave him a knowing look. The man looked like he was in his mid-twenties. He had light stubble. He had monolids and dark hair.

''I'm sorry ma'am, but you can't go inside right now,'' He informed visibly gulped realising the foul mood of his boss' stepmother.

''Why I may ask?'' Lana asked coldly, taking a step back.

''Because Mr. Syde just had a three hours meeting. He has told everyone not to disturb him at any cost.'' The man informed.

''Tell him I've come. Don't test my patience young man.'' Lana threatened. On the other hand, Sophia looked around, trying to make sure that a scene wasn’t caused, beads of sweat forming on her forehead regardless of the air-conditioning.

''Mom,'' Sophia leaned towards her mother and said, ''I think we shouldn’t disturb Miles. Let’s go back,'' She almost begged, tugging at her mother’s palm. The need to find an escape from the situation she’d found herself into rising gradually.

Lana ignored her daughter's plea and almost yelled, ''Listen, mister, I'm Miles' stepmother and I have every right to get inside without needing anyone's permission. So back away and let me go in,'' her wrath received the attention of a few people around.

''I'm sorry, ma'am. But I'm Miles' Assistant and it’s my job to make sure his orders have been followed the way he wants to. You can wait in the foyer and I'll inform him right away when he has woken up.'' He tried persuading her.

''NO!'' She yelled, ''Get away and let us in,'' she nearly screamed, annoyance evident in her eyes.

''Madam I-'' The assistant stopped mid-sentence when the cabin's door was pulled open from the inside. Miles had woken up by Lana's murderous yell. He stared at Lana who was looking completely pissed with clenching jaw, then at his little sister, Sophia, who was standing behind her mother looking distraught. His eyes then settled at his assistant asking for what the hell was going on here. But before anyone could say anything, Lana started speaking again.

''Miles, what kind of people do you hire on work. I shouldn't be stopped in my own husband's company like this.'' She stared deep into Miles' eyes furiously.

'’He was just doing his job,'' Miles said calmly and his assistant released a breath of relief, because the way she was talking to Miles, he felt like he was going to get fired. Miles then continued, ''Please forgive him. Let’s get inside, huh?'' he spoke in his famous monotone voice.

Lana glared at the poor assistant one last time before walking past everyone and into the room taking a seat on one of the two chairs in front of Miles' large desk. Sophia gave the assistant a small apologetic smile and walked inside taking a seat next to her mother.

''Finn, send some water in my room,'' Assistant Finn nodded. His eyes flickered inside before he left.

Miles took a deep breath, pinching the skin between his brows. With no other option left, he went back inside. He stood, towering over beside Lana. ''Okay, what is this visit about?'' Miles came directly to the point. He stared at his sister for a while and realised that she probably was having a hard time. The usual smile or at least the tranquillity in her dark eyes was missing.

Lana ruffled her hand into her purse and took out a sheet asking Miles to grab it. Miles slowly took the piece of paper in his hand and examined it. It was Sophia's fourth semester’s mark sheet. He looked back at Lana and raised his eyes.

‘’she has passed,’’ he summed, his verdict sounded like a question. He tried to figure what the problem was here, his eyes scanning the piece of paper.

‘’Passed, but her marks are lower than the last semester. I don’t see any progress,’’ she further explained. ‘’her theoretical progress is as good as none,’’

Miles raised his arm and lightly scratched his stubble. He looked between his sister and step-mother. ‘’you want her to learn practical knowledge,’’ he did his math, nodding at Lana who looked surprised that he could understand without having to explain a lot. ''Is Soph okay with this idea?'' he saw his sister snap her eyes at him, enlarging them.

''Yes. She is,'' she answered for Sophia, who sunk into her seat wanting to either disappear or the chair to swallow her.

Miles nodded, ''Sophia and I will discuss the formalities. I'll ask someone to drop her off,'' Lana nodded standing up and leaving immediately without a farewell. Sophia sighed and leaned back in the chair closing her eyes for a second. The last time she met her brother was in the month of December and it was February now. Miles was a workaholic, he hardly found any time to come back to his family and spend time and she wondered if he misses her as much as she misses him.

''Sophia, you don't have to do this if you don't want to,'' Miles’s voice reached her ears and she felt him looking at her.

''Who cares what I think anyway,'' She muttered with still shut eyelids.

''Speak clear,'' Miles demanded, his low yet strong voice gave her goosebumps. He was always the scary kind of brother and she always wondered if he would ever change into someone softer.

Sophia took a shaky breath opening her lids and nodded, ''I want to,'' Because I don't have a choice. ''When do I start?'' she looked up at her brother with gathered confidence.

‘’If you’re ready, tomorrow itself,’’ his eyes met hers sharply. ‘’I’ll send you Finn’s number. He’ll email you the details. And if you have any doubts, you can reach out to him,’’ he nodded back at her.

Their eye contact broke with a knock on the door and the office servant in a blue uniform entered holding a tray that had two glasses of water. Miles nodded at him as he left after placing them under Miles' sister's nose.

"Have it." He requested with a hand gesture towards the glasses. He turned back to face the large glass from where he could see the view of the city and its skyline. He spoke; "I'll show you around the office so that you can be more comfortable tomorrow when you join in. And before leaving, you'll have to do some paperwork too," When he turned back and looked down at his sister, he frowned. She wasn't listening to him at all as he caught her playing with the globe on his desk, her fingers running over it.

"I expect you to pay attention when I'm talking." Miles’ voice snapped Sophia back to reality. "Not only when it's me but for any senior working in this office. Am I clear?"

 "Crystal..." Sophia, who slowly straightened up, mumbled tucking some hair behind her ears, ashamed for getting caught red-handed.

‘’Louder, Sophia,’’ her brother sighed in defeat at her amateur behaviour pinching the skin between his skin.

‘’yes, understood,’’ she wanted to roll her eyes, and resistance to it was nearly too difficult for her.

‘’Alright,’’ he nodded, moving away from her. ‘’I’ll give you two minutes, drink some water, relax, think about the internship again if you want and then come to Fin’s desk. You know where it is?’’ he asked, gripping the handle to the door. He scrutinized Sophia until she nodded her head and left her alone.

With a sigh that escaped her lips, she leaned back with the glass of water still in her hand. She felt lighter with her intimidating brother not in the room anymore. Her arm rose so that she could take sips, with her eyes wandering the office room, taking in the changes Miles had made since their father retired, him being the heir became responsible of the company. She smiled as nostalgia reached out to her with images of her younger self and her father in this same room years ago. Her bottom lip overlapped the upper lip as she remembered all the times she would come over here after school and play cards and make sketches while sitting on the couch that was still in the corner of the room, but in a maroon colour now and not yellow. She deliberately remembered how she once stained the yellow couch with paint and ended up getting a lecture from her mom instead of her dad, who barely acknowledged her mistake.

She got up on her feet slowly and decided to experience the luxury of Miles’ chair that sat there proudly behind the glass desk.

‘’Comfy,’’ she giggled, spinning the chair. She cursed at herself when she spoiled some water on her freshly washed shorts. Sophia did not realise how the door for the room was pushed open until she heard the sound of a footstep. Her eyes narrowed at the young boy who looked a few years older than her staring at her with the same suspicion. 

‘’who the fuck are you?’’ asked the curly head approaching Sophia with apprehensiveness. His eyes followed her figure that got up. ‘’You know sitting over there on that chair would get you in a shit ton of trouble, right?’’ he looked her up and down, his eyes judging her outfit. ‘’You don’t work here,’’

‘’will you let me talk, Mister?’’ she knitted her eyebrows, hating how he towered over her short self.

‘’Lady, I hope you have your explanations ready because –‘’

‘’I’m Sophia Syde, the daughter of the chairman and the sister of the Miles Syde,’’ She folded her arms across her chest and suppressed a smirk at the guy’s pale face and gaping mouth. ‘’cat caught her tongue?’’ she whispered leaning her head closer to him.

But the guy backed away and rubbed his hand against his mouth to get rid of the non-existent sweat on his upper lip. He avoided meeting her eyes and scratched the back of his head. With gathered courage, he stared back at her and found her smirking but her eyes held a bit of both amusement and annoyance.

‘’I didn’t know…’’ he explained in a small voice.

‘’your fault,’’ Sophia leaned against the desk, facing him.

‘’I’m sorry, okay. Please don’t tell Miles. He’ll fire me,’’ he flapped his hands lightly. ‘’I’m kind of new here. And I’d never heard anyone talk of you in this office,’’

Sophia’s smirk fell and she realised how he was right. After her father’s retirement, she stopped visiting the building because she didn’t have anyone invite her over anymore. So she pursed her lips and nodded acknowledging his explanations. She pushed herself off the desk, putting the glass that she was still holding over it.

‘’You should be more respectful though,’’ she advised him.

‘’well, if it were a possible intruder, I think Miles would have been pretty proud of me for catching ‘em red-handed,’’ he retorted calmly with a shrug of his shoulders.

‘’intruder?’’

‘’I said possible intruder,’’

‘’Do I look like a possible intruder?’’

‘’well, I’m non-judgemental as fuck,’

‘’You’re also very stupid,’’

‘’uh, guys?’’

The bickering stopped when they found Finn watching them carefully holding the door open.

‘’Is everything alright?’’ he asked, his eyes flickering between the two. Sophia seemed to get over whilst the other participant had his face scrunched up. ‘’Sophia, you were supposed to report back at my desk five minutes ago. And Troy, weren’t you supposed to bring Mr.Syde’s pen drive to me?’’

‘’I was coming, he stopped me,’’ Sophia said giving the guy whose name Finn addressed as Troy, a sharp look. She walked past him and towards the exit.

‘’well, that’s not the complete truth,’’ Troy muttered whilst grabbing the black pen drive by the laptop on the desk.