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I'm trying my best to be grateful for this pregnancy knowing I'm one of the lucky ones, to be able to conceive without much difficulties compared to those who have been trying for years, even decades.

So believe me when I said I really, really am trying my best.

But one after another issues keep happening in my life, in just two days, that I start to question if this is what I get for being a wife who always fight with her husband; Islam teaches us, women, to treat the husbands as a king, contrary to what I've been doing since the past five years. I even went rogue these couple of months when I purposely rebelled to ensure a divorce at the end of the two years contract.

Here I am, horrified with what I've gathered in just two short days.

One, an unexpected pregnancy when I was so sure about the divorce.

Let's just say I've accepted the fact that there will be a child in my life, though divorce is still at the back of my mind.

Two, it was fun during the baby-making, yes. Very fun