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Chapter Fourty Four
She wanted him desperately tonight. She was in labor. If Jeremy had been her husband he would have been here to hold her hand and she would have clung to him. Loving him so much she wouldn't have been frightened at all. For the first time for a long while she felt a sick, crying need for him. She wished to God he were not so far away and that he knew.... Knew what was going to happen to her tonight.
Tonight she was going to have his child.
Perhaps not tonight, but tomorrow. People said this could go on for hours. So far she had only had two proper pains. She called down to Joey a note of high pitched excitement.
"Joey, the baby won't arrive before you get back, will it."
He laughed back at her.
"Afraid not, Penny. I can't promise you it will be as quick as that"
"I don't think I want it to be" she called. "I want the nurse
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BREAKING POINT Chapter Fourty Five
"Oh, you will be worse before you are better, dear. Now, don't you carry on. You will forget all about it when it's over. I have seen dozens vowing that they will never have another baby while this is going on and once it's over they start talking about their next "Penny gave an hysterical laugh. Her next! There might never be a next. Perhaps this would be her last. Oh God, what a pain... It would be her last. She was not going through this again for anybody.Joey called up that he was in touch with the doctor and he would be here shortly. Audrey left Penny to nurse Caroline, and suddenly Penny felt horribly deserted, left in the hands of a stranger who had complete control over her just as this pain was controlling her body. She could not get away from any of it.Nurse Caroline was a nice little woman with grey hair and powerful spectacles behind which there beamed a pair of blue and kindly eyes..
BREAKING POINT Chapter Fourty Six
Doctor James and nurse Caroline stood at the foot of the bed and looked at her. Her face was tranquil and lovely, despite the sweat and the tumbled hair and the purple bruises under her eyes.Doctor James frowned."It's a dammed nuisance" he said. "that baby is not making the headway it should. She will sleep for a bit but I'm afraid she will wake up to another nasty bout"Nurse Caroline twisted her lips.This was not a straight forward case, that was obvious. But like everyone she had implicit faith in this doctor."I will go down and get a spot of sleep" said Caroline. "Call me when she wakes out of this"Downstairs in the little living room he had a tall with Joey. Audrey went into the kitchen to make coffee for everybody. There were all thankful that Penny wasn't suffering any more for the moment. Audrey had been horrified at the sight of Joey's face when
BREAKING POINT Chapter Fourty Seven
"She may want you, Audrey. She will be coming round now"Audrey ran up the stairs, hesitating for a brief moment outside the bedroom door. With a sudden pang of desolation, she thought :'If things had worked out between Alex and I, my children would have been born here in this house,... In that room'She brushed aside such reflections and knocked on the door.Penny felt as if she were returning from a long, long way... From eternity itself. She opened her eyes to see Audrey bending over her. For an instant she did not speak but she listened and heard the cry of a baby... Her baby, an amazing exciting sound. It was an incredible relief to be able to lie quite still without suffering, no more of that awful, racking pain, just to lie drowsily, contentedly, listening to the cries of the new born baby."Is it a boy or a girl?" she whispered, and was surprised at the effort it cost he
BREAKING POINT Chapter Fourty Eight
"That's settled then" said Audrey, relieved. "I think Joey has arranged for the priest to come here tomorrow and see you. What about god parents?" "You and Joey of course" Penny replied without hesitation. "Maybe he should have two god fathers" Audrey said with a smile. "Why not ask James. After all, young Howard practically owes him his like. At one moment James thought he might have to operate to save your life and that would have meant no baby" "Oh Audrey don't say things like that" Penny cried, "I can't imagine such a horrible thing. No Howard. How awful" "You really do worship that baby, don't you?" Audrey said. "Well of course" Penny said promptly. "After all, he is mine, a part of me. Part of Jeremy too. I adore him" "I'm glad" Audrey said. It was odd... And sad, she thought, that this little boy might yet prove to be the one person to stan
BREAKING POINT Chapter Fourty Nine
"I'm certain he smiled this morning" Penny said eagerly. "Really, Joey, don't laugh, he did. His little face wrinkled up and I thought for a moment he was going to cry, but he smiled instead""Wind" remarked Joey caustic ally, and Penny joined in the general laughter.Audrey took another parcel from the tree and handed it to Penny. Opening it, she found a thin, gold bracelet on the inside of which Joey had had inscribed :'For Penny, with love'"Oh Joey" she whispered. "It's beautiful"'But I can't accept it' she thought. 'It must have been very expensive. I shouldn't take it'"Please, Penny, put it on" Joey said quietly as if he had understood her thoughts. "It would give me so much pleasure"Obediently, Penny slipped the bracelet over her hand. The gold links felt cold against the warmth of her flesh. Slowly it t
BREAKING POINT Chapter Fifty
Audrey, however, was convinced that many other people beside herself would be prepared to pay quite a reasonable price for Penny's sketches. One afternoon, she borrowed Joey's car and took the portfolio to town. When she came back, she went straight to Penny ""There's an offer for you from a man who runs an art gallery and bookstore" she said. "He's willing to buy your sketches""I can hardly believe it" Penny cried incredulously. "Audrey, you are a sly old thing. Where have you been?""Penny, listen, you have to take it. It's such a good offer" Audrey said."Of course I know that. It's just so good to be true" Penny laughed. "And the pay is good. I'm so grateful, Audrey. I need the money. Especially now that I have Howard"For the two weeks preceeding her departure, Penny was glad of the distraction her sketching afforded her. Together with Howard's feeds and the bottles, diape
BREAKING POINT Chapter Fifty One
It was difficult for Penny to imagine Jeremy as he would be when he came into the flat this evening. She had only her memories of what he used to be and his voice, his calls, his texts... Those long, descriptive but heartbreakingly impersonal texts of his from which to draw her picture. With soul searing honesty, she forced herself to realize that Jeremy's life in Cairo was by no means a parallelism of her own. Having a baby was perhaps one of the biggest and most wonderful experience in a woman's life. Having an illegitimate baby particularly taught one a lesson. But she could not make herself believe that the gay, social round of parties Jeremy had described would have taught him anything. Worse, it had no doubt increased his passion for youth, his desire for fun, his irresponsibility.Perhaps he had met someone else? Perhaps she, Penny, had ceased to mean more to him than a memory... A pleasant but out of date memory like the girl he had once told her about.
BREAKING POINT Chapter Fifty Two
He stole the very breath from her as his lips touched hers, moving over her mouth as if exploring a new, precious territory. Then he deepened the kiss, pulling her even closer so their bodies felt joined, seamless, and desire plunged deep in her belly; her hands fisted in his hair, awareness of anything but Jeremy and the desperate sweetness of his kiss fading to nothing.For it was desperate. The kiss was imbued with a longing that made Penny feel like this was all they would have, and she pressed closer, wanting more. Asking for more.Jeremy broke the kiss, his breath a raw shudder. "I have to ask you this" he said. His voice sounded hoarse and he still held her."Do you love me?" Do you still love me? Say it! Say it!" Jeremy demanded.Penny broke away from him with a last effort gathered from the remnants of her waning strength. She gathered herself quickly, straightening her shoulders
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