AMBROSE
Walking out of the cafeteria and releasing all of my anger at this innocent tree was the only answer that I know to bring back my cool. I thought of skipping the rest of the day and just go swimming at the river to drown all of this rage and confusion that has been clinging on me. I’m shutting down and I don’t even know why. My hands turned red and itchy the moment I decided that I’m feeling a little bit okay. I walked towards one of the empty benches and sat down all alone and waited until the bell for our next period rang.The rest of my day reeled pretty quickly and I was glad that it was everything that I hoped for. Today’s our first day of basketball practice and I found myself changing with the rest of the team. I slipped on my jersey and I honestly don’t feel galvanized to finally touch a ball after how many months. I only joined this school’s basketball team because everybody thought I’m good at it. Being
AMBROSEI wasn’t so sure if I’m going to head inside the house now or should I just stay here outside for a bit longer. I don’t have the slightest problem being alone if the company that I’ll have is the company of the parents that has ceased showing love for their only child. I suddenly became nervous to see my parents after almost a month but that’s not something new. I’m pretty much certain that they look the same and will act the same towards me. They would still talk to me just like a regular person they know and that’s it. Of course I would talk back to them like the way I learned how to talk to them. I usually just give them a short and precise response to whatever they are asking or talking about. I only tell them such stories if they asked. I only smile if it’s necessary. I have lost all sense of the love and affection that I once had for them and they deserved it.I had this mixed feeling
AMBROSEI feel like I’m stuck in the middle of a thunderstorm right now. The strong gushing winds and the heavy downpour of joy, sadness, confusion and rage were all burning at a strong signal number five inside of me. I’m not sure if I can handle all of this but I will. I have to.The water trickled down on my body washing all the soap and dirt away. I stayed inside the shower for about five minutes taking this moment of solitude to calm myself. I just had to have a moment to prepare myself for what’s going to happen. I know I’m going to sit down in front of my dad and his new woman at the dining table. I don’t want to make things awkward even though that’s inevitable.By the time I emerged out of the shower my dad knocked on my door and he’s probably going to prep me for something that might come my way. That’s my initial thought. Perhaps he’s here to command me to not talk about my m
AUGUST“You can do this!” I tried convincing myself that everything’s going to be alright despite the fact that I have no assurance of that. I’m very well aware of the fact that anything can happen under the afternoon sun, especially when you are alone with the school’s number one bully.This is probably the most terrible idea that I have come up with and there’s a high chance that this is going to fuck me up in the face. Ambrose might potentially kill me for real and there’s a lot of factors to consider. First thing, he hated me to the bones. It is very much blatant that he has a lot of anger issues, he has all the arsenal in his pocket and he can easily dish out all of this bottled up anger all on me. Secondly, he’s very much capable of breaking my bones to pieces if he decides to. I believe I haven’t seen Ambrose’s true demon form that’s delicately wrapped in pure wrath. If he&r
AUGUST“What are you doing?” I asked even though I already know the clearest answer to that stupid query. He just got naked and there’s a river flowing right in front of us.Perhaps, this is just my crappy attempt at starting this agreed upon conversation with him. I know the incoming conversation that we are about to have will be interesting but I just want to warm things up. Ambrose appeared to be calm here and he even said that himself, but I still have the feeling that he might just pop off at any given time. I don’t know him that much and I’m sure as hell that I’m taking a few precautions to prevent something that I don’t want to happen. I want to make sure that I make him feel that it’s okay to have a conversation with me even though he doesn’t know how to talk.Ambrose doesn’t seem to have the slightest problem getting naked
AUGUST“Is that the bridge?” My eyes began to look at the serene scenery the moment we reached the top plateau of the boulder. I can see the curves of the river flowing quietly down to which I saw the top of the Mary Heights bridge. I can’t see the whole bridge because it’s covered by the lush branches and leaves but I recognized the top steel bars that completes it.“Yeah,” Ambrose nodded and sat down while I stayed standing as I laid my sight observing the vicinity.I looked down the river and noticed that the water current is strictly controlled by a barrier of rocks equally resembling a dam. This is why the water in this part doesn’t have that rapid current that could potentially pull you and restrict you from actually swimming. The water was clear as crystal given the bright afternoon sunlight. It’s almost as if I’m looking down at a huge magnifying glass or something. I can see all
AMBROSEI don’t know what went through my mind that I dragged August here to my secret spot. I have never brought anyone here before even Phil and the gang doesn’t know about the existence of this beautiful place. I don’t really have a plan to have a conversation with August but hearing him asking me sounded very much inviting. I also have some questions that I want to be answered and this is probably the only time that I’ll get this chance.“Why did you kiss me?” August asked out of the blue and somehow it threw me off the grid. I knew he wanted to talk to me and I haven’t had the time to ask myself why did I even said yes to him in the first place. His words echoed inside my head as I felt my chest pump faster.“I don’t know.” I uttered in response. I did expect this specific question to pop sometime but I was a bit surprised that it came sooner that I thought. Despite of that, I
AMBROSEIt is honestly hard to pretend not to know the way towards August’s house. I’ve already followed him all the way to his house once and my good sense of direction still remembered the way unsurprisingly. My elaborate act of innocence seemed to be playing out well with August.“Just drive straight this road then turn to Marianna Street,” August pointed forward right after we passed the bridge.“Okay,” I nodded.He was riding behind me and although he’s confident enough not to grab on my torso to support his balance, it’s quite enough for me that I can still feel his body right next to mine. This might be gay, whatever they might call it, but I’m starting to like this set up. The wind whipped right straight to my face as I stepped on the gas even harder. August must be lucky that he was the one wearing my helmet instead of me but I am not complaining at all.I felt my c
AUGUSTThey say the universe is full of wonderful things that are hard to explain. There’s this famous question of what lies across the universe? There’s also this question of what lies beneath the unexplored vastness of the ocean? There are even these mad spirits and paranormal occurrences all across the world that science have much difficulties of explaining. And then there’s me. I can’t explain what I’m currently feeling right now.I am standing stiff like a lonely scarecrow at the outer layer of the cornfields as I watched Ambrose slowly disappear out of sight. Ambrose just drove away without leaving me something to look forward to. Why am I even thinking that?I might have to put the blame all on me for that certain action. I don’t really want to invite him inside our house purely based of the fact that we are still technically strangers in so