Very typical of him to follow me. Not like I expected any less though. “Jane! Jane! Wait!” He shouted after me and I ran into my room as quickly as I could and shut the door firmly. I didn’t lock it but then he didn’t dare to try and open it on his own.“Please. Jane! I know I can’t say anything to justify my actions but please. Hear me out,” he pleaded from the other side of the door while I carefully sat down by the door and buried my face in my palmsI started sobbing and crying my heart out.Everything went silent the moment I started sobbing. I actually thought he had left me in the room to cry peacefully. I angrily hit my hands and my legs in a frustrated way, because yeah, I was truly and deeply frustrated because of everything that was going on in my life at that point. I was even contemplating becoming a nun for a while, so that I would have peace of mind and I wouldn’t think about any man or whatsoever. But yeah, that life was not for me. That’s basically why I had not ve
But of course, I knew better than to take my life. If there was anything I would never do in this world, it was definitely not taking my life. It was something that was ingrained in me as a child while growing up. No matter what it was I felt I was going through, all I could do was cry. Even if I cried for days, for weeks, for months. But one thing I wouldn’t do was to take my life. Because I did not give myself life. It’s not that I believed in God or any other creator for that matter, but I knew I was not the one who gave myself life. It would be rude, extremely rude, to take the life that someone gave me as a blessing. I would feel hurt if I gave someone life and the person decided to take it by force. It didn’t make any sense to me to do that. It doesn’t make sense. It will never make any sense to me. So suicide was off the chart, even though I considered it a couple of times. It didn’t matter as long as I didn’t do it.At that point, I needed therapy. But the therapist Henry h
Maybe I was wrong about Landry all this time. You know, I started to regret the times that I told my sister she shouldn’t tell me anything more about Landry. She was so into the idea of us becoming a couple, a relationship, actually. She was so into it and she tried to entice me about him, but I didn’t listen because I had a big head. And now she’s off somewhere enjoying life with Landry’s brother David, and I am here with no Landry, still no husband, no son. It was a terrible thing to think of. I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy, and that’s just a fact.“But what if that is the only way I know how to punish people?” I said curtly, but I was still being sarcastic and somewhat joking a little bit. I did want to grab his head and strangle the life out of him, but at the same time I was grateful to him for not doing everything Henry told him to do. “Will you open the door for me? No, I mean you can start with your punishment right away.” He said and I couldn’t believe it, but I
I felt dizzy for a while because I was so confused. I was usually the one who said I love you first in all my relationships. I was usually the one who made the first move, probably because of my desperation. I hoped so much that this man wouldn’t see through my desperation, that he wouldn’t see how desperate I was to find somebody to love. But obviously, I was wrong because he saw it. Why would a man be telling me that he loved me on the very first day we met? And given the circumstances surrounding it, it was a big lie, at least in my ears. What did he mean by love at first sight?“Jane, Jane, did you hear what I said?” David’s voice woke me up from my little mini trance right there. I didn’t even realize that I had drifted off from the normal conversation that we were having. But in truth, I didn’t know what to reply to that because obviously, I didn’t love him. But I did have a little bit of liking for him. And if there’s anything I’ve learned over the past few months, it’
“Oh, not so fast, David,” I said, holding up my hand. “Not so fast. You have to take it easy with all this flattery. I’m very quick to fall in love, haven’t you noticed that?” I teased him and he looked at me with a twinkle in his eyes. His smile matched his eyes, bright and warm. It was one of the most brilliant features about him. Was I falling in love again? I had just promised myself that I wouldn’t fall in love so quickly, but I couldn’t help it. This man was amazing. So good looking… Even more good looking than Henry and Rick combined. And I had a very high affinity for very good looking men. And to be honest, at that point, I didn’t really care. I just felt that I should live life and just be who I wanted to be, when I wanted to be, and how I wanted to be.“Oh, I have noticed,” he said, leaning closer to me. “We did have quite the chemistry there when I first walked into the room. When I got coffee with you, you know… I felt it. It was kind of obvious. But I didn’t think anyth
“Why don’t you call them to know what’s up?” He asked, looking at me with concern. I shook my head.“No, no, no, no. We already spoke about this. We discussed it. It’s OK. They will have to be the one to call me after the mission is complete. I can’t call them now. It would be destroying something in the mission.” I said, biting my lip nervously. I was already tapping my feet fast on the ground and grinding my teeth anxiously. Just remembering everything already brought a knot to my stomach and a lump to my throat. And I guess he noticed, because he reached out to my hands and took them in his. He rubbed them gently and gave me a reassuring smile.“It’s OK. I’m sure you’re going to get the text soon. But I need to ask you some questions. I don’t know if it will be OK for you to answer them for me.” He said and I looked at him. I hesitated a little bit, because I didn’t say I was going to trust anyone with the information that I had. But I was willing to give him a small chance. May
“OK, so I have some detective friends who could also help out in your case, but I need your consent with everything. I promise you it’s not an affiliation with anybody, not your ex-husband, not your fiancé. You know I just really want to help, just in case you need backup. Is that OK with you?” He asked, his voice gentle and reassuring.I looked at him, feeling a surge of gratitude and affection.His eyes met mine, and I saw a flicker of something else in them. Something warm and tender, something that made my heart skip a beat.I almost wanted to jump up and hug him, but I had to comport myself because I was a lady. Oh, fuck it, I thought, and jumped up and hugged him tightly. He wrapped his arms around me, holding me close.“What was that for?” He asked, sounding surprised but pleased.I smiled shyly and pulled away slightly. “Well, you care about me more than anyone else cared about me ever since I lost my child. So I think you deserve more than that.” I said softly.He took my ja
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I said, with a very nervous chuckle, as I tucked my hair behind my ears and faced forward, avoiding his gaze. But deep down, I knew he was right about what he was saying. I was just very afraid to admit the truth. He asked again, “Jane, look at me. We need all the information we can get if we’re going to get to the bottom of this. You don’t have to be afraid to release any information. You don’t have to be reluctant to do that, OK? I’m here, standing by your side. I’m always by your side and I will forever be by your side. Right now, we need all the information we can get. You’re the only one who can give us that information. Do you understand, Jane?” He asked, looking at me intently. I shook my head, feeling overwhelmed by emotions. I didn’t know how to feel at that point, because he was right. I knew so many things that could have made Henry make this decision of his. Or whatever it was. I knew quite a few things about why he may have lef