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Chapter 75
My mom had to stop by the front desk again before we could leave and I thought about everything that we talked about during our session. I thought about all that Dr. Brown said and I wondered about the word ‘high functioning anxiety’ and her explanation of the possible suicidal tendencies. We went to the pharmacy as my mom put in the order for the medication prescription and I walked around the store trying to distract myself while we waited. I came across a large three-section notebook and I reached out to grab it to take it with me. After some time, we finally left the store and while we sat in the car my mom was looking over the new medication that was prescribed: Benzodiazepines.
“I don’t think I’ve heard of this word before…” she mumbled.
I reached for my phone and googled the medicine. “It says it's to relax and ease chronic anxiety disorder… Side effects can be dizziness, headaches, and nausea.” I rea
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Don't Touch Chapter 76
Elliot stayed for another hour after dinner as we sat in the living room with my mom as he told her about his volleyball game that’s coming up and the plan for the hang-out on Saturday. For a second, I could see the concern on her face as we talked about our plans and I had to reassure her. I feel like I’ve been using that excuse far too often that I’m not sure she’ll believe it anymore but she was more at ease knowing that Elliot will be there and I’m honestly fine if my mom has more trust with Elliot compared to me at this point. I’ve felt a bit more at ease with how I’ve been feeling and I’m trying not to be worried about anything else that could set me back.“Okay, I’ll see you in the morning,” Elliot said as I walked him to his car.“Let’s buy breakfast and pick up Luis on our way to school,” I suggested.Elliot raised an eyebrow, “You want to?”I nod, &ld
Don't Touch Chapter 77
During the rest of the class period, the teacher had everyone group together to work on the project so I just sat with Jennifer and Karen while they worked together while I was on my own trying to catch up on the two-day missing work assignments. Elliot only stopped by when Jennifer had a question since he’s the student-aid and stuck around for a bit longer until he was called to another table. I watched him for a second before going back to my work and once class was over it felt like I was caught up with my assignments before turning in the work. Elliot had to stay behind so I went ahead to my next class and the rest of that period was a lot quieter because we were doing a lot of reading questionnaires as we prepared for a quiz on Friday. By lunch, I waited for Elliot at the usual spot by the library and we walked together to get in line; where we also ran into Brian. We all made our way to the table and I looked over at my meal as I still wasn’t so hungry after our br
Don't Touch Chapter 78
Elliot grabbed his backpack before we started making our way outside and accidentally surprised the librarian as she was about to enter her office by the front desk when she spotted us. We left the empty parking lot, seeing that we left the school a lot later than planned, and I walked into my house after he dropped me off. My mom was already home cooking dinner, I guess she was serious when she said that she was going to change her work hours, and while she was busy I finished the rest of my homework for my other classes. We sat together once dinner was ready, spending the rest of the night talking about school and how everything was going before leaving my room to prepare myself to go to bed.I was using the notebook to mark every time I took my medicine, and I continued the same routine the next day, but I was by myself waiting for my mom to pick me up since Elliot’s game is at another school today. Saturday arrived, I was sitting in the living room writing on the no
Don't Touch Chapter 79
The restaurant was a bit crowded when we arrived so we had to wait to be called once a table was available and we did have a large group, but it took almost fifteen minutes for us to sit at a long table. The menu had a variety of platters to choose from and we each took turns ordering after some time as we looked over the menu. I slowly reached a hand to grab Elliot’s from under the table seeing everyone was distracted and slightly moved my chair a little closer to him as he gave me a small smile.“Okay, you guys, I say we have a bonfire next time we hand out,” Fernando said, calling everyone's attention.“That would be awesome! We can all go swimming, toast some marshmallows, and sit by the ocean.” Jennifer said, smiling at the idea.I’ve never gone to a bonfire, I wanted to say, but there were still many things that I’ve never done before like today for example.“We have to go early to make sure we have a
Don't Touch Chapter 80
By morning, I was ready by the time Elliot came by to pick me up and we stopped to grab drinks before going to school. Elliot got himself an iced coffee while I got orange juice, our usual drinks, it was comforting being able to start our day like this. The entire ride to school, I pulled out my notebook as I pick a few of the pages reading them to Elliot and it’s been slightly embarrassing having to read out loud to him about the things that I have been thinking or feeling, but at the same time, he has always been understanding about the challenges I go through. This is the third time that I’ve read to him and I’m still debating on reading it to my mom, but I haven’t had the courage to and we sat in the car as I finished reading. I can see Elliot watching me after he parked and was cuddling his drink as he listened.“Can you read about Saturday?” he asked me.I glanced at him before looking away, “Right now?” I asked.
Don't Touch Chapter 81
We ended the conversation there and I got out of the car ending the evening there then spent my time with my mom. The rest of the week went so fast until Thursday arrived and I had my appointment to see Dr. Brown. Mom was waiting for me once school was over and Luis was the one that walked me over since Elliot had to stay behind for practice. We made our way to the hospital and I still feel nervous just being in the building even though I know I was only going to see her for an hour. I made my way to her office after being called and noticed the room filled with a bit more plants compared to the last appointment.“Michael, how are you doing?” She asked as she saw me sitting at the same spot from the first visit.“Good,” I answered as I looked at her. “I’ve been doing better since last week.”“You do look better. Have you had any other episodes or anxiety attacks since?” Dr. Brown asked me.“No, n
Don't Touch Chapter 82
The game started with Elliot being on the court in a starting position and I watched quietly while everyone around me was cheering the team. Jennifer and Karen left for a while to buy snacks and a few drinks to share with everyone. A few times they kept cheering for Elliot that he looked over at us and by the end of the first match, our school was winning. I ate some chips that they brought and when the game ended everyone started leaving while I stayed behind waiting for Elliot. His team won and they grouped for a while as the coach gave them a speech until they could finally disperse.“Hey, where’s everyone?” He asked, noticing that I was alone.“They all left. I don’t think they had plans to hang out today.”“And what are you going to do?”“Nothing for tonight. Dad couldn’t visit today so I’m going to see him tomorrow and Sunday.” I tell him as we walk towards the parking lot.
Don't Touch Chapter 83
I stayed in my room after I had gotten ready and spent my time watching videos on my phone until my mom called me when we were ready to leave the house. It was quiet between us during the car ride until we reached the beach and we walked towards the pier after we found parking.It wasn’t so difficult to spot Dad with Lily as they walked over to us and we all treated each other while I gave Lily a hug then we took our time walking around. The only ones talking were my mom and Lily while Dad didn’t have much to say in the conversation, and neither did I, but it wasn't like the silence was a bother. We stopped at the little shops before coming across the diner that I mentioned and we made our way inside to eat. They were looking over the menu, pondering, while I got my usual and they would ask me for recommendations since I invited them to this restaurant. We had a decent conversation over dinner and after we continued on exploring the pier until it was time for Dad
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