“S…Stop… Following me.”
I hurry to the back halls to avoid as many eyes as possible. All of the regular kids took the main ways, but I had my preferred paths. And I would prefer if Alex wouldn’t follow me there.
As thankful as I am that he kept his promise and returned my car, he and I aren’t friends.
“C’mon, seriously. I was wrong to say that. What happened to you?”
This…really can’t keep going on.
I stop suddenly, and he stops just as quickly. When I turn around, it’s with an aching chest that just keeps squeezing no matter what I do.
“Y-You told Oliver—to…to accept my ‘no.’ I’m telling you…n-o. So. Stop. I’m f-ine.”
Alex stares down at me, his hands at his sides.
This time, when I turn around and flee, I don’t hear him following me.
— — —
My goal to fade into the background continues to fail. I don’t realize how badly I’m failing until after school, though.
As I make my way to my locker, I feel more eyes on me than usual. This is supposed to be my calmer pathway to my locker, so why is everyone looking at me?
No one ever looks at me like this. It makes me want to melt into the floor and seep through the floorboards, into the dirt.
The murmuring gets louder as I close in. I see a suspicious pile streaked on the ground.
Ah. It’s because my locker is absolutely trashed.
The lock I had used was no match for whatever broke it.
Test papers, study guides, old grades, strewn out like a crime scene. Photos of me back in elementary school are plastered on my door and ones around it. Some are from my performance as Little Ophelia in The Magpie’s Dream, my braces and rotund crow suit worn anxiously.
I kept them here with the love notes from my mom just to give me a pick-me-up sometimes. Those, too, are exposed to the open air and the phone cameras recording them.
With the actual locker empty, I realize that my school and leisure books are missing.
Yet, I am too deep in shock to react like I usually would.
Someone likely told Danielle about how Oliver tried to help me in the cafeteria. Or maybe, was it Jessica, lashing out at me in similar jealousy? Has some other girl decided to make me their target?
The kids around me murmur and giggle, taking photos and videos to post online. I just stand there, staring at it all, unsure of what to do.
Someone taps on my arm. I stiffen abruptly and look over, eyes almost bursting from my sockets.
The girl, Hailey, startles at my reaction, backing up. We've talked enough to be cordial with each other, but she's never seen me like this.
“Uhm…Cynthia? You hear me?"
I can’t speak, so I nod instead.
“Uh…so.” Hailey looks off to the side. “Your stuff. Your books, I mean. I've heard…they’re in the swimming pool…”
Some kids ooh’ed and snorted upon hearing the news, but I was going carefully blank.
— — —
The natatorium—the swimming pool room—is connected to the building, right by one of the two gyms we have.
It’s the middle of winter, so the pool isn’t being used very much. The swim team does some winter training, but for now, the pool area is mostly shut down.
When I arrive, the doors are wide open, the darkness inside waiting for me. I shut my eyes tightly in internal pain, then scrub at my head with my hand, growling under my breath.
It’s definitely a trap.
Cautiously, I dump my backpack over in a corner near the swimming area doors, leaving as much stuff there as possible. In goes my purse, safe and zipped up, then I take out my phone for the light.
I don’t know where the light switch is in the dark room, so it can’t be helped.
The water is very still in the darkness, gleaming when my phone light hovers over it. I immediately go over to the water, considering the words of the person who alerted me.
However…I don’t see pages floating, or ink starting to haze over. The pool is as clear as ever, straight to the bottom.
Confusion starts to make me skittish, but something colorful catches my eye. I shine my phone over to look and…
It’s my books. They’re not in the pool, but in a neat stack on a visitor’s chair, dry as a bone.
However, I can’t even sigh in relief before someone shoves me hard from behind.
Suddenly, water chokes my nose, mouth, and ears.
Chlorine burns my eyes as I start to struggle. The water is frigid.
My clothes are ill-suited for swimming. They get heavier as I fight to get to the surface.
Once my head breaks through, I gasp and cry out. But there’s a loud bang.
I can’t see straight yet.
In fact, I can’t see much at all.
The natatorium doors are closed, and I’m in complete darkness.
Wheezing and gasping, I struggle and splash over to where I think the poolside is. It’s hard to tell in the darkness.
My hand sparks with pain when it smacks against the side of the pool. Still, I’m grateful for it, trying to scramble out of the water.
Eventually, I manage to crawl out, and I simply sit there. I have to wait for my eyes to adjust as much as possible. The pitch blackness of a closed room is different from the ambient light of the forest at night.
There’s no point in trying my phone. I dropped it somewhere in the water as soon as I started struggling. With the light out, I know it’s dead.
Crawling on wobbling legs as the cold pierces through to my bones, my fingers brush against the ground until I find the cold metal of the doors. When I reach up and push on them, they don’t budge at all.
Phone dead, no light, no contact with the outside world. No one comes to the swimming pool at this time of year. My best bet is to wait until a security guard or teacher checks…when?
Later today? Tomorrow morning?
Whoever planned this meant for me to suffer, so maybe tomorrow.
“Hah… Haha… Ha…”
Wry, pained laughter starts to bubble out of my chest.
Why is all of this happening to me?
I never asked for any of this. For Oliver to date me, for Alex to pay attention to me… It’s all just come to me, but now I have so many enemies.
It…hurts.
It hurts.
I curl up in front of the door, my forehead against my knees. The laughter won’t stop, little wet giggles to fend off the urge to sob.
I don’t have a guiding light anymore. I’m just…stuck in the dark.
All I hear is the sound of dripping water and ripples…
Actually, no. There’s something else.
A voice calling out. Someone…beyond the door.
It sounds like they’re calling my voice.
I don’t bother opening my eyes, staying quiet and curled up, just listening. But for sure, the voice calling doesn’t stop, getting louder and clearer.
As it closes in, there’s a smell. Something like pine trees. It’s such a nice smell.
I hear footsteps thump right outside the door.
“Cynthia?! Cynthia! Say something!”
It’s…Alex again. How does he know where I end up so many times?
“Hold on, I’ll just… Back up!”
I do neither of these things, just sitting and staring down at my knees, exhaustion seeping into me. As such, I’m close enough to hear something like creaking metal. Alex grunts on the other side, banging the door as it starts to…
I guess it starts to break.
The hinges and bolts that keep the door in place somehow give way.
I keep my eyes shut, protected from the bright light of the hall. My nose is filled with the scent of pine cones, only getting stronger when I feel a jacket wrap around me.
Then, I’m being picked up as though I weigh nothing. Exhaustion settles in my body, so I lean into the strong one that keeps finding me in danger.
Instead of protesting, I bury my nose against his neck.
Again. Alex has somehow come to my rescue. Once is a happenstance. Twice, a coincidence.I’m cold and dripping wet, my face against his neck, but he holds me so easily. When I feel my body start to move, I open my mouth.“...Books.”“Huh?”“My books… In the…on the chair.”“...Are you seriously worried about your books right now?”I back my head away from the lovely pine smell and stare up at him with lidded eyes. He stares back at me, then he sighs, shaking his head.“Nerd.”He finds where I’d tucked my backpack and picks it up, going back into the dark pool room. Somehow, he cradles me with a single arm and fills my book bag with the other. Is all of his strength really from hockey?Suddenly, he pauses. Before I can ask why, I hear a bunch of footsteps rushing up to the broken door.“She’s in here! In here!” Danielle’s voice rings out. “I saw her steal the keys to the pool room and—!!”When she enters, she’s followed by three of her friends and two security guards. At first, she imme
“Hey, Cynthia?”I snap out of my thoughts as I quickly shut my mostly empty locker, surprised to hear someone call out to me. But I recognize who it is a moment later, turning around to see Hailey. She looks at me, her worry clear through her glasses lenses.“I heard vaguely about what happened at the pool. Are you okay?”I nod in response to my somewhat friend. We met in Drama Club. She’s a performer, but I prefer working in the background, getting everything to work smoothly.We started talking a bit more after I drew a poster for one of the upcoming performances. She’d complimented it eagerly. Since then, we occasionally chat, though we’re not super close.She has an easygoing presence, so I don’t mind speaking with her sometimes.“Fine…uhm…Alex helped.”“Yeaaah, I heard about that, too,” she laughs a little, though there is still worry in her tone. “Uhm…I figured, since it seems like you and Alex might end up, eh, kind of knocking into each other, there’s something you should know
Redmond High is well known for its ability to produce very skilled hockey players, especially for a public school. Because school funding focuses more on sports than arts, we were able to get our own ice rink.Since it’s winter, I bundle up in my jacket before I try to go see him. Once I step into the room, as expected, it’s frigid, the warmth seeping from my skin.The Redmond Chillers are all there, skating along the rink, sitting in the bleachers, talking, the works. I walk up to the first group of people I see, not wanting to catch Oliver’s attention, wherever he is.“Uhm…excuse m-me.”The three guys all look over at me, curious.“I’m looking…for, uhm…A—”Before I finish, one sighs, startling me slightly. He points his thumb toward a short nook to his right, my left, with a bored expression.“Alex is in the coach’s office, back that way. He’ll probably be out soon, so you can wait for him.”Unable to verbalize my thanks, I just bow slightly at him before scurrying away.The short n
Mission #1 of our fake dating plan: Look convincing.On the first day, if I wasn’t threatened with getting pushed out of the drama club, I would call it quits. Because Alex is entirely too popular and too social for me to handle.He doesn’t even get left alone at Mozzy’s Pizza on our first mock date. From entrance to ordering to looking for seats, folks keep coming to greet him.“Hey man, what’s happenin’?”“Haha, nothing much, how ‘bout you?”Alex greets the fifth person in what feels like ten minutes as I try to melt into the sidelines. It’s not hard—next to him, I look like a hobo. He’s all sleek sweater and dark jeans and I’ve stuffed myself into a fuzzy turtleneck and a long black skirt.He laughs and grasps hands with the visitor, someone not on the hockey team it seems like. However, they’re friendly enough with each other that he stands there and starts talking.Someone drops something in the nearby kitchen, and I flinch, almost knocking into Alex. Smoothly, he snakes his arm
I stare at his closed eyes, processing the sensation of lips against my own.They are soft, unchapped. He doesn’t open them, pressing our mouths together like puzzle pieces.It takes me a minute to realize what we’re doing. Even after I realize it, I’m frozen in place, my thoughts running wildly. A single thought sparks.I don’t feel the need to reject this kiss.When Alex backs away, his lashes rise to reveal warm brown eyes. The golden flecks astound me with their vibrance, my mouth dropping open just slightly. He gives me a smile and a wink.My face immediately heats like a furnace. Then I remember that we’re not alone and hide my mouth behind clammy fingers.Danielle seems to be turning an interestingly pale shade as Oliver’s expression darkens ominously.Alex meets their dissatisfaction smoothly.“Do you think this is a deal? What would even make you two lovebugs think that, huh?”They suddenly remember that they’re supposed to be dating, their expressions crumpling in embarrassm
I’m still frustrated by Alex’s insinuation by the time I’m home.Once I get to my room, I flop on it with a groan. After airing out some frustrations against the bedspread, I roll onto my back, grumbling, and start looking on Instapost… It would be better to more easily visualize the face of the person I’m angry at.I access my account, the icon being a doodle of a puppy I’d made at one point. It’s all just art rather than pictures, but Alex and I decided to follow each other anyway.As I go to click on Alex’s icon of his own face, I see that there’s a recent update from Charlie’s account. My anger subsides, curiosity taking over. Charlie always takes such nice pictures, whether with friends or simply showing off her breakfast.However, looking at the newest photo just brings back the frustration all over again.She and Alex pose together. She’s holding up a peace sign and he’s smiling like nothing’s wrong. Charlie has added stickers of stars and a little heart, having tagged him in t
Alex stops coming by as often as before.The hecklers aren’t motivated to come back, but it does cause a different disturbance.“Has anyone seen him today?” Charlie asks, fretting over him. “I tried to message him, but he didn’t reply…”The other club members look at each other awkwardly, glancing in my direction before answering her. I really wish they wouldn’t look at me. Whenever they do, Charlie always shoots me a dirty glare, like I’m at fault somehow.Dammit. This is exactly what I was afraid of.I’ve diagnosed Alex’s problem.He likes talking with people, which is fine. However, he fails to establish boundaries, especially toward girls. Then, because he doesn’t like uncomfortable situations, he callously blows things off.The girls get misled when he doesn’t staunch their flirting. Then, he gets tired of the drama and leaves. Then, hurt and angry, the girls fight each other and cause trouble.Rinse and repeat.The worst part is he doesn’t even seem to realize he’s most of the p
He doesn’t let me go like he did earlier today. Instead, he follows after me closely.“What’s wrong? Did something happen?”But I keep my head down, refusing to answer.He rushes forward and stops in front of me.“C’mon, Cynth. Look at me, would you?”Hah. I’m not sure when we’d moved on to the cutesy nicknames stage of our fake relationship, but it’s interesting to know we’re here now. Especially after he just dissed a girl who he’d let flirt with him for days.All the exhaustion and irritation that’s been building up finally boils over.Fine. He wants to see backbone?I’ll give him backbone.“Don’t get carried away, now. Falling in love is a no-go.”He blinks, surprised at the tone of my voice. It’s lower than usual, as it usually comes out when I’m beyond caring.“…What are you talking about? I’m not in love with you.”The laugh I let out is ugly.“Really? Running after me, always trying to protect me, hanging out with me…it’s all just kindness and friendship, huh? Well, if I could