Izip up my suitcase and haul it into the living room. I’m on call tonight and then I’m home free, ready to spend a week on the Hawaiian coast with Alyson. Everything is ready, and I plan to sleep as much as I can until I have to go in. Then it’s come back here, take a quick shower and drive to Chicago so Alyson and I can board the plane together.
The last time I went on a real vacation was my senior year during my pre-med schooling. Jacob and I went to Miami for spring break, stayed in a shitty-ass motel and almost got hustled by a pair of twins. Can I even consider that a vacation?
“Did you pack the ring?” Sam asks, coming out of the kitchen.
I turn, giving him a surprised look. “You know about it?”
Sam’s eyes widen. “I was giving you shit. You really bought her a ring?” “Not quite. Her grandma gave me her ring to propose with.” “Are you going to?”
I run my hand th
“Boston?” I echo even though I heard him right the first time. “As in east coast Boston?”“Yeah,” he says, not looking away from his phone. I can see the conflicting emotions on his face, and I hope he looks up and says it’s not worth it after all because his family is here in Chicago.But he doesn’t.“I think our ride is here,” he says instead, and grabs my carry-on bag, hiking it up on his shoulder. I flip my hood on to keep my hair dry and wheel my suitcase out, and the word Boston repeats through my mind over and over. I’ve been to New York but not Boston. It’s not a terribly long flight, but it’s no quick trip either.And Emma will be born by then. Traveling alone with a baby has to be difficult. I can’t tell Jim not to go though, right? He’s furthering his education, not taking a year or two off to party.“Get in so you don’t get wet
“A re you doing all right, babe?” I ask Alyson, wondering if the sun is getting to her like it’s getting to me. Though judging by the distance between us, she’s doing just fine.She stops, turning around and holds up her phone, taking pictures of our surroundings before taking one of me.“I’m fine, just like I was the last time you asked me. You’re a slowpoke.”I laugh. “You ran up ahead.”“I thought I saw a ferret.”“They’re mongooses. Mongeese? They were brought here to help control the rat population but took over.”“Well, they’re cute. I want one.”“I think they’re mean.”“They just want love.” Alyson puts her phone back in her bag and holds out her hand. I take it, lacing our fingers and pulling her in for a kiss. We’re hiking today, on our way to see a waterfall. It’s hotter
“Today is our last day to stake a claim on the beach and never leave,” I say, running a comb through my wet hair. “I’m not ready to leave in the morning.”“Me neither. I know my surgery schedule and it’s back-to-back operations.”“I feel bad for you,” I tell Jim, turning away from the mirror to look at him. “I have Sunday off before going back into work.” I comb out a tangle, regretting keeping my hair down while we were at the beach today. “Will you work as much in the fellowship?”“The workload will be more intense, and the hours will probably be similar.”His words make me cringe, but only on the inside. Jim needs a break. He deserves one more than anyone I know. “It’s just two years,” I say, trying to be optimistic. But two more years of working eighty hours a week sounds awful. Jim closes the balcony doors and lays down on the bed, turnin
I lean back in the uncomfortable airport seat, watching our bags while Alyson goes to the bathroom. We’re headed back to reality, and something seems different between us. As much as I want to deny it, I know what it is. After taking care of that drunk girl last night, Alyson told me I need to take the fellowship. She said she can see that trauma and life-or-death situations are what I’m made for, and I can’t disagree.But I should. Because as much as I want to take the fellowship, it feels wrong telling her I’ll reply with my acceptance as soon as we get back. Yeah…I want to be a trauma surgeon, but it’s not like settling for general surgery is the shitty consolation prize. She’s so encouraging and optimistic, hinting even that she’d move to Boston so we can be together. I want nothing more than to be with Alyson, but I know she’ll hate it up east with me.I’d be at work more than I’d be at
I hang up without leaving a message and set my phone down, feeling a little uneasy. I haven’t talked to Jim since yesterday afternoon. Things still weren’t quite resolved between us when we got off the plane, and it’s making the missed calls seem like a bigger deal than it is.I know Jim was in surgery throughout the night and is working again today. He doesn’t usually call if he gets off in the middle of the night, not wanting to wake me up. Though given the way things are unsettled between us, it’s making me worry. And when I worry, I tend to obsess and assume the worst is going to happen. That way if something slightly less traumatic actually does happen, I’m not as devastated.“My bitch is back!” Marissa throws her arms up and comes into my office. “It was so boring around here without you last week. How was vacay?”“Fun,” I tell her with a smile. And it was, up until the plane ride home
“Your frequent flyer is back.”“Are you serious?” I look up from the paperwork I’ve been filling out for the last twenty minutes, knowing by the nurse’s face she is.“Popped stitches. ER sent him up.”“They can’t do stitches down there?” I grumble.The nurse rolls her eyes. “Apparently ‘it’s internal,’ and he needs to see a surgeon. Like we can just put him in front of our other patients. Do you want me to send him back down?”“No, I’ll deal with it. Thank you, though.”I finish my paperwork and deal with the difficult patient, who had a hernia repaired a month ago and hasn’t followed post-op instructions at all. He’s been in three times since his operation. I do rounds after that, finish my paperwork and finally go home after a twenty-six-hour shift.Another resident who’s been in the program with me sin
“Your tummy is big, Aunt Winnie.”“Thanks, buddy. But if you think this is big, just wait.”Jackson scrunches up his nose. “I still don’t get how Jim put a baby in there.” “Hey,” Weston says, shaking his head. “We talked about this.”I try not to laugh, knowing the reaction will only perpetuate the situation. “What did you say?” I quietly ask Wes.“A lot of stuff that confused him even more. But I told him it’s not polite to talk to women about things in their bellies.”“Good call. Raise him to be a gentleman.” I put my hand on my lower abdomen, wincing as I straighten up.“You okay, sis?”“Yeah, I’m fine. I’ve been having more round ligament pain the last few days. My OB said it was more common in the first trimester, fades in the second, and comes back at the end. Some lucky people get it the whol
Isink into the driver’s seat, squeezing my eyes shut for a second before starting the car. I just got home from Boston, and I have a headache. Both from lack of sleep and from everything going on. But after talking with my mother, I knew what I had to do. You make sacrifices for your children, and in the end, they’re worth it.I have two missed calls from Alyson, and it’s been killing me not to call her back. I wanted to wait until I was in the car though, so she wouldn’t hear the sounds of the airport. Leaving the parking garage, I call her, and she answers after the first ring.“Hey, babe,” I say. “Sorry I missed your calls. I was in back-to-back surgeries.”“You’re at work?” she asks, voice flat.“Yeah. But I’m out now.”“Sure.”“Are you still in Eastwood?”“Yep. That was my plan. Stay here this weekend.”&