I can't believe I just did that.One final shiver of pleasure ripples through me as I stand up. I take a deep breath and move on shaky legs to my door before stumbling down the hall to the bathroom.That went even better than expected. I know I should feel ashamed, or at least a little embarrassed, but I don't. I feel completely victorious.Well, okay - not completely victorious. Calder hit me by surprise with that one. I should have seen it coming. I know from experience that he plays dirty.But for a minute, I felt like us again. There was no weird tension, no stress or secrets or scandals. Just us, without the rest of the world. I couldn't see Calder's face, but I heard his voice and I know he felt it too.I lean over the sink and splash water on my cheeks. My skin is still flushed, but there's not much I can do about that. I can, however, pull off my panties, which are uncomfortably wet at this point.As I clean myself up, I start thinking about what I'm going to ask him to d
By the time Thursday shows up, I'm ready to put my fist through the wall.A couple of our teachers have come down with the flu, so I've been working overtime to make sure they have everything prepared for classes next week. Gina Billings is still on her crusade to cost us all of our funding, and while no one has yet to obey her "suggestions," we've been fielding calls from annoyed donors all week. I'm afraid this might cost us in the long term, and I've yet to hear back from Asher Julian about the article.On top of that, my dad seems to be coping with the extra stress by being extra nosy."He's been asking me about you," Morgan tells me when I pop by her classroom that afternoon with a couple of blueberry scones. "Well, he's been asking about this mystery guy you've been seeing. Thought I might know something.""He what? What did you say?" Crap. I wasn't expecting Dad to go all super-sleuth on me."I just told him the truth. That I don't know very much and that I'm sure you'll le
Where did everything go wrong?When Calder met me at the door, he grabbed me as if he couldn't bear to be away from me for a moment longer. Hell, we got so caught up in each other that we literally set the kitchen on fire. It was only a few days ago that he confessed he needed me. What's changed? Or has the guilt been there all along, just carefully hidden away?I'm a mess at work the next day. I do my best to avoid both Morgan and my dad because I can't bear for either of them to see me like this. I spend the better part of the day out of my office, doing inventory in the supply room. That way, when I inevitably find my eyes welling up again, there's no one there to see.I'm completely pathetic.I grab a box of crayons from the nearest shelf and hurl it across the supply room. It hits something and the cardboard box splits open, spilling crayons everywhere."Fuck him!" I say, throwing another box, then another. "Fuck him, fuck him, fuck him!"This time I don't pay attention to w
There are two options when the world feels like it's exploding around you: throw a pity party and cry yourself to sleep, or call up your girlfriends and booze the night away. I choose the latter option. I call up Morgan and practically beg her to go out for drinks. Fortunately, her fiancé Mark is working late tonight, so she's more than willing to help me drown my frustrations in some whiskey. I give her only one condition: that we talk about neither work nor men all night.I end up getting sloshed, of course.I leave my car at the bar and take a cab home, and even then it's a miracle I make it up the two flights of stairs to my apartment. I fumble with my keys at the door, dropping them twice before I manage to get the damned thing unlocked.Trying to get undressed is an adventure in and of itself. I finally collapse half-clothed on the bed, and it's only because I land awkwardly on my purse that I remember I promised Morgan I'd call her as soon as I was safely indoors.It takes s
"What?"But he doesn't answer. He turns and walks back to the bathroom to retrieve the clothes he left there last night."What the hell, Calder!" I say, struggling against my bonds.My annoyance doesn't seem to bother him. He returns a moment later, his pants already on and his shirt in his hand. He slips it over his shoulders as I watch."This is just a sick joke, isn't it?" I say. "Another one of your lessons?"Calder is now fully clothed. He sits down on the bed, looking down at me with that smug smile of his. If I could move, I'd slap it right off, but I guess he was thinking ahead."Is this payback for last night?" I ask. "I didn't make you come over, you know. I would've been fine."The question seems to knock a little of the wind out of his sails. His smile drops slightly and his eyebrows shift toward each other."You shouldn't have had so much to drink," he says finally."So you're going to lecture me now? I don't want to hear it."He sighs. "Do you have any idea how
This is a bad idea.Calder's upset - a storm waiting to erupt - and I have yet to understand the extent of his pain. He's dangerous for me. He's too unstable, and I feel too strongly. Not to mention the fact that I'm still pretty pissed at him. My gut tells me that this will only end badly, but my heart doesn't care.I don't know what secret burdens he still carries, or how those secrets might tear us apart. I know only that he no longer wishes to deny the cravings of our bodies, and that I am too weak to resist him, in spite of my reservations.The time for talking is past, at least today."You still owe me a dare," he murmurs.I smile. "Then I dare you to remove your clothes. And you're not allowed to put them on again until I say so."He flashes me a devilish grin as he climbs off the bed and pulls off his shirt again, revealing his broad, muscled shoulders and chiseled chest once more. The pants go next, and by the time they hit the floor it's quite obvious that he's as excit
We spend the rest of the day and much of the night making love.The following morning, he tells me he'd like to go back to his apartment to grab a few things. When he rushed over on Friday night, he hadn't anticipated staying all weekend."Come with me," he says. "We'll grab some food."The food is only a pretense, I know. I can see it in his eyes. He's afraid, like me, that the minute we step back into the real world, everything will come crashing down around us. The minute we part, we'll start thinking about all of the things that might push us apart again.I agree to go with him, of course. I'm not ready for the spell to be broken just yet.I sense that something's off the minute we reach Calder's building. Calder does too, judging by the way he glances around the parking lot. He grabs my hand as we step out of the car, but the gesture feels more protective than affectionate.We're halfway to the building when I see the man with the camera. He was waiting behind a car, but he
He kisses me like it's the first time. He kisses me like he'll never have the chance to kiss me again. His arms are strong and gentle around me. His mouth is soft and hard, pleading and demanding, and I can do nothing but fall against him. He moves his lips across my cheek, tracing the paths of my tears."You're the most amazing, breathtaking woman I've ever met," he whispers against my skin. "I swear, if I ever see that prick again - I don't care if he isn't violating the restraining order. I'm going to kick his ass."He shoves me back against my seat, but when he moves his hands over my chest, his touch is delicate, worshiping."That bastard was an idiot," he says. "And I could kill him for hurting you.""I'm all right," I assure him.Calder doesn't reply. He brushes a strand of hair away from my forehead. His eyes bore into mine, and I feel like he's finally seeing all those little pieces of my soul I've kept hidden from him. I knew he had shadows hidden away, but I've been avo