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Chapter 47
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His Wicked Games series Chapter 48
- LOUISA -The next morning, I feel like there are a hundred tiny little men trying to break out of my skull with pickaxes.I didn't sleep at all the previous night. I spent a while pacing back and forth until my legs started to shake, and then I curled up by the window and pressed my cheek against the glass, staring out across the estate until the sky brightened with the light of pre-dawn.I'm currently on my fourth coffee. I was able to finish my last few tasks in the gift shop before Ward showed up, and I'm more grateful for that than I want to admit. I don't want to know how I would have responded if he'd made me another offer to continue our, ahem, acquaintance.As usual, Mr. Haymore's running around like a chicken with his head cut off. Edward Carolson and his family arrived late last night, and my boss wants everything to be ready for the luncheon at noon today. That means I've got my errand-girl hat on, but I'm more than happy with the busywork. It keeps me from thinking a
His Wicked Games series Chapter 49
- LOUISA -As usual, the universe is quick to dole out some instant karma for my indiscretion. Not half an hour after the luncheon ends, I'm informed that I will be accompanying Haymore and the Carolsons on their little tour of the grounds this afternoon.I've spent every minute since I left Ward beating myself up for being such an idiot. I'm not an animal. I should be able to make it through a day without trying to jump someone's bones. I don't care how upset I am - I promised myself that I wouldn't look for that kind of comfort anymore.It's hard enough, remembering how I treated Ian. How easily I gave in to those urges, even when I looked into his eyes and saw emotions I knew I could never return. I don't want to be that girl any longer. I don't want to take two steps backward for every one I take forward.I need to take responsibility for myself. And that means avoiding temptation - Ward - at all costs. It also means sitting down and responding to Ian's email. Apologizing for
His Wicked Games series Chapter 50
- LOUISA -The airport is louder than I remember.It's been about two months since the last time I walked through here, but that seems like a lifetime ago. Like a dream. I stand in Baggage Claim next to the single luggage carousel. Barberville's airport is small, but today it's still overwhelming. Once I was excited to walk through these terminals - they were my link to the world outside of my family. Now they only serve to remind me of the emptiness I found on the other side of the planet.I glance around. This place is pretty busy for a small, local airport. I imagine things will go crazy around here when Huntington Manor officially opens. They've already cleared the land to the south of the airport. It looks like they have plans to expand.I'm so busy watching the people pass that I almost miss the one I've come to meet. Suddenly there's a figure in front of me and I find myself looking up into those gray eyes I know so well.I open my mouth to greet him, but no words come. So
His Wicked Games series Chapter 51
- LOUISA -I'm a bitch.I never should have let Ian come here. I never should have gone into his motel room. I never should have kissed him or undressed him or let him think even for a minute that I could return the feelings he has for me. But once again, I allowed myself to get caught up in my own emotions. My own needs.Tears burn in my eyes as I drive back to the estate, but I refuse to let them fall. I don't deserve to cry. I'm never going to change, am I? Every time I show signs of being a decent human being, my true nature has to rear its ugly head again.I can still see Ian's face in my mind. Still see his eyes full of anger and disappointment. Somehow in the past two months he's convinced himself that I have the ability to change. To learn from my mistakes and become the girl he always thought I was. The girl that never really existed in the first place.It's past ten o'clock by the time I reach the estate, and though I know I should go to bed, there's no way I'm going to
His Wicked Games series Chapter 52
- LOUISA -Surprise, surprise - I don't get much sleep that night. It doesn't seem to matter how exhausted my body is. The minute I lie down, my mind starts to race, and on the occasions I do manage to drift off, strange dreams keep waking me up again.I use the time to my advantage, getting to work on the wine bottles. A quick Internet search brings up several ways to remove a wine label without damaging it, and a short time later, I have the labels from both bottles in my hand. I consider keeping the one for the Miel Doré, but it's not worth the risk. Tomorrow, I'll sneak back into the cellar and glue these labels on other bottles - ones that haven't made it into the database yet - and if I pull this off, no one will notice that either wine was gone in the first place.The project keeps me busy, but it doesn't keep my mind from drifting back to Ward. To the way he looked at me. I already know what it feels like to kiss him, how fully my body responds to his. If I'd wanted, I coul
His Wicked Games series Chapter 53
- LOUISA -Those last few days before the press members arrive go by in a blur. Mr. Haymore apparently thinks I'm the Energizer Bunny. He has me doing so many things I'm shocked that I'm still standing.But I like being busy. I feel productive. And that's a much better alternative than stewing on my problems. I don't have time to think about the fact that Ian hasn't responded to my message - whether to worry about how he's taking the news or to be relieved that he's accepted my decision. And I don't have time to think about Ward - to wonder how he's recovering from his injuries or think about the fact that the impending grand opening means his work here is very close to done. Even if he's well enough to get back on the job, there's a chance I'll never see him again.By the time the big morning comes, I'm both physically and mentally exhausted. The only reason I'm not in a puddle on the floor is that I'm jacked up on four cups of coffee. If I stand in one place for too long, my enti
His Wicked Games series Chapter 54
- LOUISA -The next morning, I'm still in a daze.I'm exhilarated and confused and... I don't know what. Completely addled. Maybe last night was a mistake. Maybe I'm just doing it again - distracting myself with physical sensation when I should be sorting myself out.But something about this thing with Ward feels different. Crazy, yes, but not crazy in my normal way. Crazy in a my-world's-been-turned-upside-down kind of way. It feels like I've been flipped around and set on my feet in a strange new place.Maybe it's just some side effect of coming back to the estate. All of my emotions have been on overdrive these past couple of weeks. It's no wonder I should have a strong reaction to my new delicious acquaintance. But the funny thing is, I'm not even sure what that reaction is. I'm not sure whether I want to yell at him some more or spill everything to him or just throw myself into his arms for another round.And honestly, this morning I don't really feel like questioning it too
His Wicked Games series Chapter 55
- LOUISA -I lean against the wall for a long time after we hang up.I deserved that. I deserved every word he said. And I know I'm going to be carrying around the shame of this for a long time.I close my eyes and try to find the emptiness deep inside of me. I know it's buried in there somewhere. The hard part is over, and now I just want to drown in numbness for a while.But it's not enough.I don't stop to think about what I'm doing. I shove my phone in my pocket and head down to the eastern wing of the house.Ward's exactly where he said he'd be. There are a couple of other contractors down here, too, all helping with the moldings, but I don't give them a second glance.Ward looks up as I draw closer, and his face brightens. I answer with a very wicked expression of my own, then continue past without a word. I wouldn't want any of the other workers to hear.He gets the hint.I continue down the hall, and I don't even have to glance over my shoulder to know that Ward is fo
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