I love the look on his face as he comes. He’s beautiful I feel such power for bringing him to this point. His expression is no longer haunted—need and desire are all I see. His taste, everything about him draws me closer to the cliff that my heart sits on. I’ve never wanted to be owned. Alex changes that. I want to own him too. Watching him slide into my mouth is thrilling and erotic, as well as satisfying, even though I haven’t gotten off.He lifts me from the floor and I stand facing him. The look in his eyes burns my flesh. It’s a visceral reaction to watching him come undone.Then he smiles.I couldn’t stop my grin if I wanted to.His smile grows tender. “You’re worth more than I could ever pay, Celina.”I need the words. Selling my body was all I had. The women at the escort service have their reasons for what they do, but they also have the option to walk away. I was desperate. Alex’s simple words clear the baggage from my head. He brings his lips down on mine. My mouth is fill
AlexWe shower in cool water as I slide soapy fingers over Celina’s curves. She’s facing away from me with her shoulder leaning against the wall of the shower. Whereas she was content a few minutes ago, she’s troubled now. I feel her tension as my hands glide across her skin. “Tell me what you’re thinking, mi corazón.”She doesn’t make a sound, but after a few moments, I see the tremble in her shoulders and turn her so I can see her face. The pain I see in her eyes has me pulling her against my chest. I run my fingers over her wet hair as she cries. She’s been so strong and this shouldn’t surprise me. It guts me. I don’t want her tears and would do anything in my power to stop them. She mumbles something against my chest and I move her slightly away. She looks at me with pure desolation.“I don’t know how to be a mother,” comes out between more sobs.“Oh, baby,” I say as I pull her against me again. What do I say? I haven’t the slightest idea how to be a father.“She needs so much and
Celina I arrive at the nursing home an hour later. It’s a large white building that looks exactly like what it is: A place to die. I wipe my eyes again. Having a driver has its benefits, though sitting in the back of the car and thinking about all the overwhelming details is not one of them. On the only positive side I can come up with, having a driver most likely saved me from crashing my car. I left Kiley with Gabriella and Alex and I can’t think about it right now. My mother is sitting beside my father when I enter the room. Her hand is resting on his pale, lifeless one. She glances over her shoulder and sees me. That’s when she leans into my father and begins sobbing on his chest. I walk over and put my hand on her back. I inhale deeply because even in this place, the smell of sugar cookies rolls off her and brings me home. She feels so frail. When did that happen and why didn’t I notice? The man lying in the bed with his slack, frozen features is not my father. He’s been gone
AlexAll I can do is be thankful that Gabriella takes over with Kiley. When Gabriella walked into the kitchen, I was doing my best to wipe juice off Kiley’s face and fingers. In Spanish Gabriella let me know exactly what I was doing wrong. Apparently I needed more water on the paper towel that is now stuck to the child’s fingers. I made my escape as soon as possible.Then, things went from bad to worse. I received a call from the men I sent to Antigua. Manuel is dead and Danita nowhere to be found. I have Cal using his computer skills and checking airline manifests. Thankfully, the flights out of Antigua are limited to only a handful of airlines. Of course, there’s always the ocean. That escape route will be harder to track. Danita isn’t stupid, so I expect none of this to be easy.With Kiley in Gabriella’s capable hands, I drive to Manuel’s wife and inform her of his death. They’d been married for ten years and don’t have any children. Giving her the news is bad enough and I shouldn’
CelinaIf not for the frequent conversations with Alex, I would be crazy. I haven’t seen him or Kiley in three days. He gives me assurances and even talked dirty during one of our short calls. For a few minutes, I was able to forget this crazy world I’ve been thrust into and dream about the next time I’m in his bed. I really need him doing all those dirty things he’s so good at.Yesterday, Gabriella called and said she had arranged for two women to provide food at my mom’s house after the funeral. I couldn’t question her about Kiley because I hadn’t found the chance to tell my mom about her or Lee. I feel like the worst person on the planet and guilt eats at me.When my mother and I arrived at the funeral home to meet with the director, we found out that Alex had covered the expenses. I should have done something to stop him from paying the bill. In reality, I’m too indebted to Alex already, but I have no idea how to stop him from spending his money on me. I’ll save that for another d
AlexNo one in their right mind enjoys funerals and least of all me. Watching Celina suffer with her father’s loss won’t be easy. She sounded so incredibly sad when I spoke to her by phone, and it’s hard not having her close and wrapping my arms around her. With my lack of sleep, I’m pathetic over wanting her near me. I’ve lived with the images for so long that they’ve become part of me. Now, I know what it’s like to sleep soundly. Yes… pathetic.I’ll be attending another funeral as soon as Manuel’s body is in Arizona. As of now, it’s unknown how long the Antigua authorities will keep it. Murder is a rare occurrence there and the government isn’t happy. Moon’s lawyer spoke to an investigator for two hours last night. He told them Manuel was in Antigua to offer protection to Ms. Danita Moon because she is Moon’s beloved aunt. Now she’s missing and her bodyguard dead.The attorney proceeded to throw incriminations back on the investigator and told him Ms. Moon retired to Antigua because
CelinaAlex’s entire body goes taut. I shouldn’t have brought him in the car with me. It was selfish to want him close. Of course my mother would ask prying questions. She’s a mother and I should have considered what this car ride would entail. She has a captive audience. Alex and I don’t have a relationship beyond the physical. I know nothing about his family other than what he’s told me about Madison and Moon, which is very little.I place my hand on his and offer a silent apology. His fingers squeeze back and then he tells my mother about his parents. “They’re dead. My father died about eight years ago and my mother when I was a young boy.”My mother leans over me and takes his free hand. “You poor dear. To lose them both is awful, but to lose your mother when you were young is beyond painful. Do you have any siblings?”I fight a groan and have no idea how to shut my mother up.“A sister. She has two children; a boy and a girl. She lives out of state and I don’t see her. Madison an
AlexWe received news this morning that the guns were delivered to our connection in Mexico. Corbin kept his word. With the added stress over the past few days, the unwanted images continue to play in my head. I’ve worked out, meditated, and worked out again. Yesterday with Celina helped more than all the cardio and weights combined. She’s my temporary cure. The picture of my father came out of nowhere. It’s happened before and caused problems. Moon extricated me from one very bad situation. I think he’s known for years that I hide something deeper behind an easy smile or a joke. I refuse to discuss it with him. He’ll think I’m insane. Hell, I most likely am. There’s been no word on Danita and our frustration builds. She’s gone to ground and I know she couldn’t do it without help. We also don’t have a date on the return of Manuel’s body. The Feds had a sit-down with Moon and his attorney yesterday afternoon. Moon said nothing and let his attorney speak for him. The last thing we nee