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Forty-One: High On You
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ILLICIT AFFAIRS Forty-Two: Papa’s Love
LISAThe words were out of my mouth before I could help them and while I was still trying to wrap my head around the fact of what I just did, he already pulled me into his hands to hug me protectively and soothingly.I couldn't remember the last time someone did that for me when someone hugged me this protectively and made me feel seen, consoled, and understood.It brought fresh tears into my eyes which made the whole thing hella embarrassing. I just confessed my biggest weakness to my biggest enemy and as if that wasn't enough, I was here crying on his shoulders. I raised my hands to push him away but he kept his hand wrapped around tightly around my body, making it impossible for me to move away. More tears started flowing from my eyes and the situation that I was in wasn't even helping matters. My body was barely wrapped in a towel and he was dressed in a pant that did nothing to conceal his hard ruggedness. And I was here sobbing into his shoulders. I tried my hardest to cry si
ILLICIT AFFAIRS Forty-Three: Fuck Her Out Of My System
AXELIt took a while for Lisa’s tears to finally subsidize and I lead her to the bed. She wouldn't meet my eyes when I handed her a box of Kleenex. She just collected it wordlessly. I immediately excused myself from the room and went to the kitchen. I found myself making an herbal tea and it was only when I was about to enter my room that the absurdity of the whole situation dawned on me. I don't think I've ever made tea for anyone apart from myself, not even Prince and here I was, about to give Lisa Volkov tea while she still had my towel wrapped around her body and was sitting on my bed. And let's not forget that she just admitted one great, if not her greatest weakness to me and she just had a mental breakdown in my arms. I've never been good with crying women, I've never even liked the idea of crying women, I don't know what to do with them and most times, I always end up getting annoyed or something.But with Lisa, I had felt a protective surge course through my veins when she
ILLICIT AFFAIRS Forty-Four: Surprise
AXELIt was a couple of days after Lisa confided in me about her intense hatred for killing people, something that she does best and does most of the time. And during those days when we were apart, I've spent half of that time feeling incredibly sad on her behalf that she was being forced into doing something that she didn't want to do. And I've had the other half angry at whoever was making her into what she didn't want to be. Most female mafia daughters that I knew were mafia princesses and they were always doted upon by maids and soldiers waiting on their beck and calls, they lived a princess and soft lives, they were completely unlike Lisa. I’ve always thought that she was just different, that she enjoyed the thrill of killing, that it makes her adrenaline surge faster as it does for most made men. I didn't know that she was doing something she didn't want to do, that she was doing something that gives her nightmares on end. I didn't understand the dynamics of her family to kno
ILLICIT AFFAIRS Forty-Five: Blurring Lines
AXELShe closed the distance between us and she threw her hands around me, hugging me.For a minute, I stiffened and froze under her hug because I had no idea what I was supposed to do with it. We've never been in this much proximity if it doesn't include a lead-up to sex. Hugs were reserved for people who shared a deep affection for each other, who liked each other and cared for each other, not people like us who shouldn’t even be seeing eye to eye. People like us who share a risky arrangement that must not and should never see the light of the day.And here we are, with her hands thrown around me, enveloping me in a hug that I wasn't supposed to like because I wasn't even a hugger, I've never liked the idea of hugging because why should I? Hugging was waste of time when we could use that time we'd waste on hugging for something more productive like fingering or sucking. But her hug was making me feel something different, something I've never felt before, it was an alien feeling, o
ILLICIT AFFAIRS Forty-Six: More Blurred Lines
LISAI turned it into ice.My whole body turned into ice at that familiar voice and the tray of edibles nearly fell out of my hands when I turned back and I confirmed my greatest fear at that moment. Angel Volkov, my sister-in-law was really standing across me, talking to a man. But thankfully, her back was to us but any minute from now, she was going to turn back and...God forbid! I whirled around immediately."That's my sister-in-law," I told Axel even though I was already sure that he knows who she is. I half-expected him to abandon me because it wasn't his problem, Angel wasn't his family and he wasn't going to get into any trouble because of her. But we couldn't say the same thing for me because I was going to get into a shitload of trouble if Angel should see me and that looks like it was going to happen any minute from now on. "Yeah, I know," he replied as he took the tray from my hands and he dropped it on the nearest table and without voicing it out, we already both sta
ILLICIT AFFAIRS Forty-Seven: Secrets
LISA“I'm an illegitimate child,” he told me casually and my jaws figuratively dropped to the ground. Of all the things I was expecting him to say, this was the last one, in fact, this wasn't on the list at all.I wasn't expecting him to say this and I did not believe him at all because who would, nothing about him screamed illegitimate child at all. Just like nothing about you screams bloody assassin, my subconscious mocked me.“You really don't expect me to believe that, do you?”He shrugged casually, “no, I don't but the fact that you don't believe it doesn't mean that it's not the truth.”“Come on Axel, I don't understand why you feel the need to make me have leverage over you but it's really not needed, I told you what I told you because I wanted to, not because you forced me so you don't have to make up a lie about yourself just to make me feel better that I shared a weakness with an enemy.”“I don't care about you enough to try to make you feel better because you told me somet
ILLICIT AFFAIRS Forty-Eight: Night Out
AXELWe drove back to school in silence. The Question and Answer session was already over when we returned to the venue so we just slipped into the car and drove away. Nobody said anything during the drive and just like I was thinking, I was sure Lisa was thinking about the same thing, about the vulnerabilities that we both shared with each other back on the field. We both knew we crossed a line we shouldn't cross, a line that'll blur the dynamics of our relationship but I just wanted to strike a balance, she had blurted her vulnerability out in a moment of weakness, and knowing Lisa and what she thinks of me, I was she'd always have a nagging thought at the time back of her mind that I was going to use that piece of information against her.I wasn't an unfeeling monster so there was no way I’d use that against her but she wasn't going to believe me so I had to make it a truce.I had to tell her something about me that I'd never told anyone. I've never shared a relationship with an
ILLICIT AFFAIRS Forty-Nine: Never Gonna Happen
AXEL“The shipment is coming in barely 6 weeks,” Prince pointed out from where he was sitting, “do you have everything under control?”I glared at him, making sure my eyes conveyed what I really wanted to do to him; twist his neck and yank his head off his shoulders.“I don't remember ever poking my nose in the affairs of C47,” I replied curtly, hoping he'd get the gist and his nose out of this conversation but it seemed I was forgetting who I was talking to.Tell Prince not to do something and that was the thing he'd make sure to do.“Well, C47 isn't directly your business but this shipment concerns all of us,” he replied casually, “I hate to admit it but if it should flop, C47 would be affected badly.”“You’re lucky you're my friend, if not, I’d have pulled out your tongue a long time ago.”“Save your love language for your soldiers please, I'm not interested in them.”“Bastard.”He lifted his glass in a mock cheer, “never denied it.”I poured from my third bottle of beer into the g
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