Matilda’s DiarySadly I am also the kind of girl most men would look over. Not even take the hint of a glance. At least that's what I found. Plain, quiet, subservient, church-going, Matilda Sanchez. At reaching twenty-four years old I was still luckily living with my parents but unfortunately we had just moved across the state to a new city for my dad's work. In some regards I was fortunate, I wasn't leaving behind much, only a part time job at a little Christian book store and certainly no real friends to speak of. Not even at the church I spent my whole life going to anytime the doors were open. Even the other girls there found me to be far too strange and far too sheltered.Maybe I was, but it was for the best and I believed it. I never questioned my parents and their reasoning for the things they did. It was just how things were done and I was more than happy with that. God told me how grateful I should be.But there is no denying that after a while life was a little lonely as wel
If he knew, he would surely pull us from the church and that was the last thing I wanted to do. I had only just got my foot in the door."Thank you, young lady." Father said as he stubbed the still smoking butt out on the bottom of his black shoe, skillfully flicked it into a terracotta flower pot by the back door. "Come. Let me show you around." He said as he led me up a small set of wooden stairs and into the church. We went into a dimly lit hallway and the father brought me to a door right across. It was his office which looked a lot different than I thought it would. It was pretty modern for a priest with a nice computer chair behind a desk that held a laptop sitting right on top. Out in the open. I rarely saw my dad's as he kept it tucked away from me and mom.Not too surprising since we didn't even have a family TV since my parents saw no need for one and would rather I study the Bible or read for entertainment. Again I was enthralled that Father had a TV hanging on the opposite
Matilda's DiaryAfter mass I would again clean up the church before going down to the basement to do whatever needed to be done. Thankfully, Father was manly and took care of all the heavy lifting and removing any scary bugs I found down there. He was such a manly man. I knew deep down he was untouchable, the kind of man I should be lusting over.That was hard for me, spending an evening sewing away on my ancient Singer using up some old fabric, lost in my thoughts to come to the conclusion that I was, in fact, desiring for my new priest. I so badly wanted to confess, knowing if I passed beforehand that I would end up in Hell. But, how could I do that? I tried, every Tuesday and Thursday actually. I would sit in the booth wishing I could smell that almost comforting hint of cigarette smoke, but with that screen between us, I couldn't . So I would sit looking off in the dim area and talk at him."Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned," I would start, holding my rosary tightly in my han
Matilda's DiaryI smiled as my face grew slightly red. "Thank you, Father. It's really been an honor for me though. I love giving my time to the church. It feels like it's... best spent here." Was it though? Was this really the best place I could be when I had such horribly fond feelings for the priest? Probably not.He gave me one of those award winning smiles he seemed to always have from behind his cigarette. The look he gave made my heart skip a beat or two. I found myself wondering just why he had decided to be a priest when he could easily have any wife in this world. Maybe it was because no woman on this earth deserved him. But I was sure I was not the only one that wanted him.Not by far.Being at the church so frequently and for so long I had become accepted with the other women, just as my mom and I had at the previous church. Sometimes after a couple of mugs of tea, they would be less than embarrassed to talk about how hot the priest was. Of course me and mom never partook
Matilda's DiaryThis was not my best, prettiest pie crust since I rushed myself to finish the flattening process so I could discard the roller all together, as if I would be just fine if the tool was out of my hands. My mind was still wondering though as I added the filling and covered the pie, crimping the edges of dough together with a fork before putting it into the preheated oven. With that out of the way, I made a big pitcher of lemonade and put it away in the fridge to cool down while waiting for the pie to finish.I cleaned up my floury mess for a while, but once I was done there was still time left on the oven timer for the pie. I sighed and leaned on the counter, looking outside and as a brief cloud of smoke drifted past the window I was busy picturing what happened earlier. Thinking of how it felt to have his hands on me, rubbing so gently and giving my feet the attention they so desperately needed. Now, there were other parts of my body that craved the very same touch."How
Matilda's DiaryI had become cold to my family, just as I felt they had been towards me for years. I guess I had overdone it though, because one day I came home from the church, extremely late, well after dinner time, and found all my things packed up and sitting in the driveway. Getting out and stunned with what I was seeing, I noticed my dad coming out of the house and walking over to stand with the palm of his hand out open to me."Keys."With his eyes red in anger that was all he said! He looked at me with so much disgust it made me immediately uncomfortable. I slowly put the keys in his hands and he jerked away from me as soon as he had them. I took a step back from my dad and watched him as he turned to go back inside. "W-what am I supposed to do now?" I asked, eyes flickering from him to my bags on the ground, reaching up and grabbing for my crucifix on my neck and fighting back the tears."Doesn't matter to me. Call your little priest friend to come help you," he answered, not
Matilda's Diary"Oh that's interesting." I said as I looked between the two, my stomach burning with jealousy. This woman was so pretty and had things I wanted from him already, but who knew what she was getting from him now. "Do you visit often? Will you be joining us for morning mass?""When I'm able to and I'm near town I do drop in to check in with him. I do worry. I am glad to see that someone is taking care of Evan here. He needs it," the woman laughed lightly. "As for mass, I will pass at this unfortunately. Unfortunately, I am not, how do I say it, a part of the church. Only passing through to catch up with a good friend. Don't tell my husband he will be upset that he doesn't get the same treatment." she joked, laughing along with Father. I giggled slightly myself, but only to be polite. I was feeling horrible about this whole thing. It was like a fire had been set under me. Something about the whole thing made me want to jump the priest and show that he was mine now. Even tho
“I have a meeting in New Orleans…regarding a new deal. I will be there for a week. I think you should come with me,” Xavier had said before leaving their bedroom that day.It was a warm enough evening that Cara had ditched her shorts and tank top and slipped into a light cotton summer dress, sleeveless, made from a deep orange material with white flowers on it. The colors complimented her olive-complexion and auburn and copper hair, which she’d pulled up on the sides, leaving the rest to brush against her sun-freckled shoulders. Xavier changed from his travel clothes into a nice pair of tight, faded blue jeans and a navy blue T-shirt, the sleeves rolled up a couple of notches, exposing his lightly muscled arms. He wasn’t as much of a sun-body as Cara was, so his skin retained its natural peaches and cream tone.And off they went. They wandered a few blocks, trying to decide on what food tempted them the most. There were the very obvious tourist traps named for television show chefs, w