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Chapter 56 "Am I Selfish?"

Ryan’s POV

Lying down on my bed, I asked myself.

“Am I selfish and unfair?”

Terban was my first love. I studied in this school and accepted living in a boarding house with men because I wanted to see him. And yet, I didn’t expect to fall in love with another guy.

I caressed my forehead which Terban kissed last night.

“My heart hurt so much when he did that.”

Why? I was so sure that my heart belonged to Slyvester. Why am I feeling this way?

“Should I burn myself and die?”

No. Burning until death might be so painful.

“Then, drown myself?”

That is too… barbaric.

“Dying with gunshot might be the easiest way. But where will I buy a gun? If I look for an illegal seller, I’ll end up in jail. If I go to jail, I cannot eat fried chicken and coke anymore. Beer too.”

I shook my head to get rid of my silly thoughts.

“Damn imagination. I’m hungry.”

It was my plan to eat Pizza with Emily last night. But Giselle ruined my mood, and that’s why I went back home earlier than planned.

“I
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