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Love and Lament 24
Brett didn't push the subject any further. He knew that things between me and my father weren't great and that he left my mom when I was young. He was also aware of the fact that I was not looking forward to meeting my father as we haven't spoken for years.Brett understood my tension and nodded. He took my wrist in his palms and pulled me. When we were finally outside and headed to a deserted balcony, I was able to breathe. I haven't spoken to my father for years. My mom and I didn't try to know where he stayed or if he ever found the happiness he was searching for.I sucked in the fresh air and let it cool my nerves. I knew that by looking at my face, anyone could say that I'm indeed worried about something. It didn't surprise me when Brett read through me like a magazine."Are you alright?" I heard Brett ask from behind me. I sighed and turned around to look at his concerned face."I'm okay," I said. "He... I didn't expect him to be here. He caught me off guard."He nodded. "Did he
Love and Lament 25
Time ticked by, and the loudness of my heart was the only thing I could hear. A deathly silence followed, contrasting to how it was moments ago. Maybe it's not just my mind that went blank when I ran into someone.I was not scared, nor did a mere thought of meeting him tried to drain the blood from my face. It's just my wish of not meeting him or bumping into him that made my heart frantically beat against my chest.I just stood there, the more I tried to act normal, the more I failed in my attempts. So I just let the person before me break the ice. Because both of us knew about how bad I am at acting like everything is fine."What are you.. doing here?" He asked, his face remaining similar to mine, just as clueless as I was feeling.When I didn't answer, he edged closer to me. He was not sure if he should be hugging me after meeting me after years or should just stay mad for not talking to him while he made every possible attempt he should."Is your mom here too?" He asked, looking b
Love and Lament 26
I walked inside, carrying my weak limbs to the party. I left my phone with Brett, so there was no way I'll be receiving any calls from my friends. I didn't meet my father after he left me, but the paper he gave still remained in my hand. Though I was sure I'm never going to need it or his number, I couldn't let myself throw it away or crush it in my palms.I let out a shaky breath and moved forward. All the events planned for tonight might have been over by now since I could find people saying their goodbyes and leaving. I was curious, about why my father and his family attended today's event. Were they one of the sponsors? Might be. I wouldn't be half surprised even if I learn that my father now owns private jets. Things happen way too quickly for people who can find it within themselves to easily move on from the past."Chloe!" I heard someone yell for me, making a few heads snap at the source of the voice.I furrowed my brows and turned around, only to meet a pair of angry eyes. "W
Love and Lament 27
"I know you'd pretend to be sick," Brett said, pulling the thermometer from my mouth and tossing it onto the mattress of the bed. "Even if you truly were having a fever, I would still have insisted you go.""I really am tired," I said, rubbing the dark circles underneath my eyes, "And you don't seem to remember that we just had a few hours of sleep."Brett could just do so much as roll his eyes at me and rip the covers off of me. He pulled me to the floor and rushed me to the bathroom."I'll be waiting," he said. "Make it fast.""Aye, aye, captain." I groaned and made my way to the bathtub, before closing the door with my foot.Sean and Sapphire didn't come back to the room last night. Apparently, Sean used to stay here before he moved to Boston. So they were spending time together at his house.After I took an extra hour to spend in the bathroom, I finally got outside when I ensured that I didn't have anything else to do inside. Brett was getting impatient, the look on his face said
Love and Lament 28
I looked behind into the charmless void, contemplating if I have any more time to back off. The same thing kept running in my mind, if I could back off now, or if I could just postpone it for a few more seconds. Though I racked my brain for all the possibilities of excusing myself from this, I couldn't find how.I let out a shaky breath, and tightened the scarf around my neck. This way, my neck will be forced to stay erect and not bend down. I can also ensure that I'm not oddly squirming around people and that I can confidently look at them in the eye and speak.I gulped before slowly bringing my hand up to knock on the door. But before I could, I went against it. Maybe I can just ring the bell? Or wait, is there a bell? I tried to search for it but realized I should be not wasting any more time since Brett is alone in the car. I should get this over with, as soon as possible.With a very brief pause again, I knocked on the door. Unsure of whether it was audible, I knocked again, this
Love and Lament 29
"It was nice meeting you." I said, kneeling down beside Ella, as she tugged the pants of dad. "Don't worry. I won't be there to upset your father again."She just frowned, seeming confused by what I said. I pinched her cheeks and stood up to look at my dad. He ruffled my hair like old times."You know we'd love to have you. And it's not going to upset me." My dad said, holding my head with his hands."If I could, I really would have." I said. "But mom doesn't know I met you. She won't take everything through phone."He smiled and nodded his head. "But you know that you are always welcome to move in. Whenever you want."I clutched his palm and smiled. "I know.""Good bye, Chloe." He said, gently pulling me into a hug."Good bye." I said, slowly hugging him back. I moved away when he let go of me and gave them a bright smile before turning on my heel and leaving.I could feel my heartbeat, it was steady. I drew in a breath, and felt absolutely no heaviness in my chest. I felt like as th
Love and Lament 30
When I first heard what he said, I couldn't fight the feeling of being overwhelmed. That was all I wanted to know anyway, although It never occurred to me that he is still waiting for me.When I snapped back, I realised he was searching in my face for any expressions that would help him understand what's running through my mind. I was just having an unreadable expression portrayed on my face. No one could completely deny that I'm shocked or angry and nor can anyone say that I'm happy."Chloe, Say something.." He said, pressing his hand into the side of my face and stoking his thumb over my numb cheek bone.I gulped at him. This was definitely not what I was expecting. He is not supposed to love me. I am not worthy of him or his love.This held me up. I didn't know what to say. On one side was him. He was waiting to hear me say that I love him back, so hopeful that his frowned was beginning to appear with a tension evident expression on his face. I knew I couldn't hurt him. That would
Love and Lament 31
The wind was blowing in my face, numbing my cheek bones and nose in the ice-cold atmosphere. We let the windows down as we drove alone on the deserted road, my head sneaking out into the air.I closed my eyes for a few brief seconds, as relief flooded through my entire system. I could hear the gradual roar of the engine as we sped up, and the demeaning silence it was bringing when we occasionally stopped to surpass the bumps.The rustling of leaves under the tires, and the distant growls of animals were the only noise in the silent weather, and the only thing that subsided against the slow music of the car.We are on our way back to Boston. After packing our things up and meeting up with Sean and Sapphire, we headed back to our home. Brett and I had no awkward moments, much to my relief, and Sean and Sapphire could thankfully not think about anything going on between us.I was glad, that I'm left free of explanation because I know that Sapphire is the first person that will be excited
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