"I know." I whispered. It may have been five years ago but it still felt like yesterday that my heart was ripped out of my chest.
"Bella," Hannah put her plate down and turned to face me. Her voice was so soft as she spoke. "It was not your fault. If it’s anyone's fault it's his."
I shook my head at that. I would love to blame Harold James for breaking my heart but I just couldn't. Most of it was on me. I knew at the time we never would have worked. We lived in two different worlds and the idiotic part of me believed it didn't matter. But in the end it did.
"You know...maybe it just wasn't the right timing. You both had other goals in mind, different paths to travel, and then with your mom..." She trailed off on the last part, not sure how I would take it. I sent her a little smile letting her know her mentioning my mom wasn't going to send me in a tailspin.
"I know. It just wasn't meant to be." I tried to play it off cool but we both knew I was lying. I had told Hannah basically everything about Harold and I's relationship and how much of a whirlwind it was.
"You deserve better than that Bella. I know it and you know it too." Hannah's hatred for Harold was kinda justified. She saw how much of a mess I was four years ago and how I've been ever since. One of the reasons she's always pushing me to go out and do things with her.
"I think it's time you move on B. You need to go out and experience love again. You are 26 years old for god's sake and let’s not forget you are smoking hot." I couldn't help but laugh at that. Right now I looked far from 'smoking hot', clad in my baggiest sweatpants and t-shirt and my hair in a messy bun on top of my head.
"Okay maybe not right now." Hannah laughed along side of me. "But I'd kill to have your red hair with those curls." It was a weekly thing that Hannah asked if she could cut off my hair and give it to her.
"All I'm saying is just think about it, okay? It's two days from now." I sighed before nodding.
"I'll think about it." At my words she squealed loudly.
"What is this guy's name that you've been talking to?" I asked, shoving an egg roll in my mouth. Come to think about it, I don't know much about this guy. Usually Hannah goes on and on about the guy she's with but she's been pretty tight lip about this one. I've heard her up late at night talking on the phone but she hasn't said anything else.
"His name is Ryan and he's 27." Almost instantly a dazed look crossed her face. "We met when I went Boston a few weekends ago. He's so sweet and hot."
I silently ate as she talked about Ryan. Going on about how he was a physical therapist, that he was funny yet sweet. They've only seen each other twice since they met but both have been too busy until this weekend. Hence why she wanted me to come along.
"I don't think I've ever heard you go on about a guy like this before." I partly teased. It was...a nice change hearing how smitten Hannah seemed to be over this Ryan guy. Hannah tends to....lose interest in a guy pretty fast which is why I'm curious about this guy.
"He's different." At the change of tone I perked up, setting my fork down. "I like him a lot."
"Why do you say it like it’s a bad thing?"
"We...we just met a month ago. I shouldn't be feeling like this." Her voice was soft and almost shaky. The last real relationship Hannah had was not a good one. I was only around for the tail end of that relationship but from what she's told me, it was beyond horrible. It's one of the reasons she's the way she is with men.
We both clearly had issues with men.
"Aw babe." I leaned closer to throw my arm around her shoulder. "I'm going to say exactly what you just said to me. You didn't deserve any of what happened to you with, he-who-shall-not-be-named. You are amazing and gorgeous and it sounds to me that this Ryan sees that too." I rubbed her arm.
"And if he doesn't then when I see him Friday I will kick his ass...and his friends too." I vowed. If Ryan couldn't see how amazing my best friend was then he's in for an ass kicking.
"Wait? You'll come Friday?" Hannah pulled away to look at me, hope filling her eyes. Of course I would say yes, especially after hearing how vulnerable she sounded about Ryan.
"I will. But," I put my hand up to stop her before she spoke. "don't except anything else from me. I'm going to support you." I wasn't sure I was ready to get back in the dating pool quite yet. But I would meet this friend of Ryan's only for Hannah's sake.
"Yes!" She cheered. "We'll make you look fine as hell, don't worry." I decided to ignore her comment for now and turned back to my abandoned food.
For some odd reason I had a sinking feeling in my gut as I thought about Friday night. I shrugged it off but if only I had listened to that feeling.
The next two days seemed to fly by. When you don't want something to arrive time always seems to go faster. I wasn't necessarily dreading going to the double date but I wasn't looking forward to it either. I'm pretty sure Hannah is going to end up leaving me to fend for myself with Ryan's friend. I just prayed he wasn't some creep like last time."I heard you have a date tonight." Rina nudged my side as she came up to the desk. Rina was a part time employee, working a few shifts here and there while going to school. She was probably one of the most bubbliest people you'll ever meet. She's almost a female bugs bunny."It's not really a date.""Are you sure about that?" She raised an eyebrow at me. "From the sound of it the two guys you are meeting tonight are severely hot.""I wouldn't know." I shrugged."You don't even know what your date looks like? Do you even know his name?" She almost yelled incredulously. I guess it never really occurred to me
"Meet you here in half an hour." With that she disappeared into her own room. I stared after her for a minute before shaking my head. With nothing else to do I went to my own room to shower. If I didn't, I know for sure Hannah will come in here and kill me.I took my time getting in the shower. Personally I was in no rush to get ready. Wasn't like I was going to impress anyone. I had full plans on coming home alone after this date and watching some tv before bed. Just a usual Friday for me.I did take some time to wash my hair and make sure my legs were shaved. Wasn't going to show up to the restaurant looking like a Yeti. I may not have a boyfriend but I wasn't going to go outside looking like a cave person.Humming under my breath as I came out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around me, I didn't notice Hannah sitting there until she cleared her throat. Cursing I jumped, clenching the towel tighter around me."Fuckdon't do that!" I hissed, my
Hannah and Ryan had agreed to meet at a new Italian restaurant just on the outskirts of our city Everett, Massachusetts. From what Hannah has told me Ryan lives closer to Boston so it was the perfect place to meet.Seeing that Han and Ryan haven't seen each other in a month I took the liberty of driving my car so I could at least get home afterwards. I had no plans of her coming back with me tonight. Not that I blamed her always.The closer we got to the restaurant the more nervous Hannah became. She jiggled her foot constantly and tapped her fingers against her thigh, making the bracelets on her wrists jingle. It slowly grated on my nerves but I ignored it seeing how worked up she was getting.It was still shocking seeing this side of Hannah. She's never one to be nervous when meeting someone. She's always been the life of the party, making friends with everyone and anyone at clubs or parties. Can't tell you how many times we've suddenly become friends with peo
Flashback...."Everyone I need your design ideas by the end of the week! As soon as you get me them the sooner I can approve and you can start. Remember you will have a little over 6 months to complete your final project. It is worth 70% of your grade."The class murmured at the new information. 70% was insane and just added to the pressure of making the best designs ever. I gazed around the room at all the talented designers the class had, anxiety washing over me. I was nowhere near as good as half the people here."You can either had them in or send me them over email. You have until Friday." The professor dismissed us. Great I now only have 4 days to come up with an idea and send it in. No pressure."What was I thinking taking this class." One of my friends, Elisa, in the class muttered. I whole heartedly agreed with her. As much as I hated to hate on this class it was one of my favorites. I loved designing and this was the perfect pla
Flashback continued....The two of us were quiet for a moment as he softly wiped the blood on my knees away with a cloth. The silence was a bit stifling and I didn't do well with pure silence."Looks like someone isn't going to make quarterback any time soon." I tried to joke again. He chuckled again, the sound filling my ears and making my chest tighten. How can someone have a sexy laugh? Cause he sure did."I'm actually the quarterback." He looked back up at me with the corner of his lip tilted in a small smirk.It took a second before it finally struck me.Holy shit balls.How did I not notice before! He was Harold James, star quarterback for our football team. He was a big shot on campus for leading our team to multiple championships and most likely going to the NFL at the end of the school year."Oh god. I'm sorry I didn't mean to offend you!" I stammered out. I just told the star quarterback he needed to wo
Present..."Harold?" Standing in front of me was the last person I thought I'd ever see. Out of all the people on the planet Ryan's friend was none other than Harold James, aka my ex-boyfriend."Bella." He seemed just as shocked to see me."You two know each other?" Ryan asked, looking between the two of us. I had no clue what to say so I just nodded.As the two of us stood there frozen my eyes moved on their own, taking him in. The last five years has really done him well. Harold's always been in great shape with football, literally had the body every guy wish they had and girls wanted in a guy. Now he seemed to fill out a bit more.His shoulders seemed wider and his waist trimmer, a lot less bulky than in college. The dark grey dress shirt he had on hugged his upper body nicely, showing off his biceps. The sleeves were rolled up to this elbows. My eyes widened as I noticed the tattoos running up both his arms. Damn, those were ne
Harold....She looked different. Good different but different none the less. Seeing Bella sitting across from me made me feel like I fallen into another universe. I had absolutely no clue she was going to be my double date tonight. When Ryan said his girlfriend was bringing her friend he never once mentioned her name or anything about her.I wasn't prepared to turn around and see her standing there. Standing there in what had to be one of the sexiest dresses I've ever seen in my life. I could do nothing but stand there and take her in. Everything from the way her bright red hair stood out against the white dress, to the way the said dress hugged her curves.Bella looked different than when I last saw her five years ago. The obvious was that her hair was longer but it was still that same bright red that caught my attention five years ago. The same red hair I imagined in my sleep.She also seemed to have grown into her body more. I wasn't e
Harold....She looked different. Good different but different none the less. Seeing Bella sitting across from me made me feel like I fallen into another universe. I had absolutely no clue she was going to be my double date tonight. When Ryan said his girlfriend was bringing her friend he never once mentioned her name or anything about her.I wasn't prepared to turn around and see her standing there. Standing there in what had to be one of the sexiest dresses I've ever seen in my life. I could do nothing but stand there and take her in. Everything from the way her bright red hair stood out against the white dress, to the way the said dress hugged her curves.Bella looked different than when I last saw her five years ago. The obvious was that her hair was longer but it was still that same bright red that caught my attention five years ago. The same red hair I imagined in my sleep.She also seemed to have grown into her body more. I wasn't e