Forty One

*AALIYAH*

Days have passed since the incident, yet the emptiness is still there and is eating away at me. In my imagination, the trauma is blooming like new flowers in the summer. Knowing my infant died in my stomach, I am so terrified that I am sitting on the floor with my knees to my chest, arms around them, and head on my knees so that my hair falls out. I'm still very much in the grip of the experience.

Clair sighs, and when I turn to look, there she is, silently standing before me for hell knows how long. Her eyes were sadly fixed on mine. I'm at my wits' end when she finally says, "How the mighty has crumbled."

I leap to my feet, already enraged, and unconcerned about losing anything because, in my opinion, I have already lost everything. What I haven't yet been able to comprehend is how a child I had only recently begun to want has suddenly become the boon of my existence.

"Clair, please leave so that you can do yourself a favour. Already I'm losing it.

"It's clear,"

"One mo