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Chapter Fifty-seven
Jaxsen and Nizhoni waited in the living room when Sebastian and Basil arrived back at the house. Jaxsen met him in the middle of the living room.
“Are you okay?” Basil shook his head. “Do you want a hug?” When Basil nodded Jaxsen wrapped his arms around his friend.
“Jack, Nizhoni and I need to talk to Basil for a bit. Can you go wait in your room?” Jaxsen nodded and with one last look at Basil, turned and went upstairs.
“Basil, sit, sweetheart. Are you hungry? Did you eat dinner?” Nizhoni asked him softly.
“I ate a snack when I got home from school. I had a bowl of cereal later.” His voice was low. He didn’t sit down as suggested but stood where Jaxsen had left him standing. With a word, Nizhoni went to he
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“There’s nothing a child can do to force away a parent’s love, Basil. If something like that happens, it’s the failing of the parent, not the child.”“Still doesn’t answer as to why. This has been happening for some time now, Jax…I just couldn’t take it anymore. I’m tired of being alone all the time. Sometimes…” He sighed and wiped his face. “Sometimes I don’t think she goes to work like she says.”Jaxsen frowned slightly in confusion. “Where do you think she’s going if not to work?”Basil hesitated. “A few weeks ago I was doing laundry while she was at work, or so she said anyway…and I checked her coat pocket before washing it and found a receipt from a bar from a couple nights before…wh
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By the end of the week Basil had crawled from his shell just a bit. His general posture had loosened, he was talking more, and Jaxsen had even managed to get a smile or two from him. Jaxsen, to his credit, did what he could in keeping the other boy distracted; something Basil was quite grateful for. He didn’t want to be stuck in his thoughts all day. He had enough trouble at night when he was trying to sleep. It was on such a night that Basil lie awake, hands behind his head, sorting through his thoughts, when a sudden, very small, scared whimper emanated through the dark to his right. His eyes had adjusted enough to see Jaxsen’s face in the sliver of moonlight pouring gently in through the window.He lay still, waiting, watching, wondering if he would need to wake his friend or not. Jaxsen’s breathing accelerated as his face scrunched up in pain unknown to the room’s other occupant
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Sebastian opened his eyes to find he’d become bathed in bright afternoon sunlight. He was dressed and standing in a field of lilies, the colors mixing and melting together in the wind. It reminded him briefly of an LSD trip when he was a teenager.“Daddy!” The voice echoed in the field coming at him from all sides. “Daddy, help me!” Sebastian began to panic as the voice blasted in surround sound.“Jaxsen! Where are you? Jack?”“Daddy!”Not knowing which way to run Sebastian picked a random direction and pumped his legs as quickly as he could. Jaxsen’s screams of terror rang out, closer, amidst the tree line that appeared before him. As he ran through the field of lilies it
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Jaxsen watched the display with mixed emotions as he remembered a similar conversation between the two of them. He frowned at the surge of jealousy that fluttered through his veins. He swallowed it, feeling it vanish as quickly as it appeared as he saw the silent tears on Basil’s cheeks. He found lately Basil needed their reassurances the same way he did several months ago. He realized that he did still need that extra assurance from time to time, but that his fears of them suddenly up and leaving him behind had quelled significantly. As he watched a tear fall and hit the floor at their feet, he realized that maybe he wasn’t the only one with those fears. Basil needed a mother who would care for and love him, just like he did. He no longer felt jealous, but instead felt happy at his own personal growth, and incredibly sad that a soul as pure as Basil’s could develop scars that matched some of his own.
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Basil knew Jaxsen would be shortly behind him and attempted to regain his composure first. It wasn’t working. He leaned his back against the wall and waited.“Why do I care so damn much that she doesn’t care at all?” He asked when Jaxsen entered the room.“’Cause she’s your mother.” Jaxsen set his arms around Basil’s shoulders.Basil sighed. “This is stupid. Why should I care? Why should I waste the energy it takes to give a fuck?” As quickly as the anger flared it burned out and the tears surfaced once again. “I want her to care about me again. I want her to hug me and tell me she loves me. I don’t want her to hurt me anymore, Jaxsen.” They sat silently beside one another for several minutes before Basil finally spoke again.
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Saturday afternoon saw the boys walking through a deserted park. They silently agreed to take a seat at a picnic table not far from the swings. Basil gandered around at the playground and it left him feeling hollow.“I feel like this place.”Jaxsen frowned and looked to his best friend. “What do you mean?”Basil shrugged. “Look at this place.” They both did before Jaxsen looked at Basil again. Basil stared out straight ahead, eyes scanning the forgotten piece of earth. “I imagine this park used to be filled with laughter, play, and innocence. Look at it now, Jax. Rusted, dilapidated, and left to ruin. They don’t even cut the grass anymore. The ones that are supposed to care for and maintain this place just…gave up and walked away.”
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Basil put the last article of clothing in his backpack and slowly zipped it closed. The small suitcase Sebastian had packed for him was lying closed on the bed.“I wish I could stay.”Jaxsen nodded. “Me, too.”“I’m scared, Jax,” Basil admitted as he sat down on the bed.“I know,” Jaxsen said sitting next to him.“What if it doesn’t get any better?”“Then tell my dad again. Perhaps if there’s a repeated pattern there will be something he can do. And if nothing else you could just come stay here for an extended sleepover or something.”Basil shook h
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“Come in,” Jaxsen called at the knock on his door. Sebastian poked his head into the bedroom. The boys were set in the center of Jaxsen’s area rug, cross-legged and facing one another. Basil dropped his head to hide his face, subtly shouldering away any moisture on his cheeks.“Everything okay?” Sebastian asked in concern.“Yeah, Dad, we’re okay.” Jaxsen glanced quickly at Basil before looking back to his father. “We’re just talking.”Sebastian nodded. “Well, Nizhoni doesn’t feel good, so I’m going to run to the store and get her some crackers. You boys want anything specific for dinner?”“Can we have spaghetti and meatballs?” Jaxsen beamed. It was one of his favorite me
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