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55: Honeymoon

I honestly couldn't believe it. I know that whatever I feel for Lucius right now is way far from what I felt for Simon before. But am I really capable of loving someone like that again after such disastrous heartbreak? I thought I couldn't. I thought I wouldn't be able to. But why do I am starting to feel different whenever I'm with Lucius? What are these strange yet wonderful feelings? Why can't I stop myself every time he touches and kisses me?

It's not because we have been sleeping together. It is not mainly because of our physical relationship. I don't know when it started or how, but I just realized one day that I feel that kind of weird feelings for him. I know it is the thing I should have avoided in the first place, but what can I do with what I am feeling for him? I don't think I can just get it away from me. I don't think I just can forget this feeling at once. I refuse to say that I love him… but thinking of about losing him… why does it hurts so bad? Why do I feel like I c
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