Mistakes

[Slate]

“Ash, this can never happen again,” I get up from the bed feeling disgusted and disappointed with myself. “We need to stop meeting like this.”

“I don’t see the problem,” she gets up to head toward the bathroom. “Is it because we’re here in the packhouse? Why don’t I move in with you?” She looks over her shoulder as she heads to the bathroom. “I’ve told you more than once that I don’t care if we are married or not. You have needs, I have needs. It’s silly to wait.”

“But that first time was a mistake, Ash,” I shake my head. “This was a mistake.”

She laughs as she starts the shower. “Your body doesn’t agree with you.”

Placing my head in my hands the whole room seems to spin. Everything feels fuzzy around the edges. I’m still not sure what came over me. Sometimes when I’m with Ash I am repulsed, and other times I take one whiff of her and I cannot control my baser urges. Our joining is always rough, never soft or carrying, as if my body is trying to find release, and doesn