“You’re pushing me too far, Kitten. I don’t think you’re ready for that yet.”
Maybe I’m not but at the same time, the more we stand here while his finger teases, the more I want him to do it. I can’t get the thought out of my mind.
“I think I am ready. All you have to do is pin me against this wall and fuck me. It doesn’t need to have anything added, doesn’t need to be long. Just test me and see if I will.”
What am I doing? The image of the videos is in my mind. Why am I so set on him doing this in front of people?
“Not here. There are over 100 guests in the three rooms. Sure, there are only like eight here but not here. If you really are ready, I will get a room sorted upstairs now and invite some guests up that I personally know.”
Do I really want this? I do want it, but am I ready? Will I really relax, or will I just panic and say no once in the room?
“Do it.”
My words are strong. I want to see if I can. His face is fu
The sound of Jackson’s voice wakes me. Smiling, I turn to face him. “Happy Christmas, my queen.” His lips press against mine. I actually did it. We made it to Christmas! Today is Christmas and I get to spend it with him and the girls. Lying here, I can’t help but marvel: this life is amazing, and I am lucky to be here with him. I don’t want to move yet; I want to stay in bed and enjoy this moment. “Let’s get up, get the girls downstairs and watch them open their presents.” I would love to stay here, but today is about the girls and I don’t want to waste a minute of it. Reluctantly, I climb out of bed. Walking to the shower, I get in and washed while Jackson walks around the room getting himself ready. I watch him to make sure he doesn’t go under my side of the bed. Once dressed, we walk out of the room together. Waking up the girls and getting them dressed, I can’t help but smile: everything is perfect right now. Walk
Walking back to the kitchen, we continue cooking. My mum and Freya walk in, followed by my dad and step-mum. This feels awkward, very awkward. I had not exactly planned how this would work. “Dad.” Walking over, I hug him, feeling slightly guilty for my mum but I still don’t feel like she is my mum. “Alena, everything is cooking so I think we should do some presents,” Helen calls over. Nodding, I agree. Get presents out of the way and then hopefully everything goes smoothly. Helen and Georgina join us. I walk over to Jackson, smiling at him on the way. He gets up. “Presents time.” He walks out with the girls, Liam and Marcus following. Sitting down, I look around. This is amazing yet at the same time, it feels weird. “Let’s start with the girls. Give them their presents first then the adults.” Jackson smiles and Helen looks as excited as ever. “These ones are from me, Georgina and Liam.” Looking towards her, she pulls tw
“I should be going home as well. Thank you, though.” Freya walks over and hugs me. I have not really spoken to my mum.“That is fine. I understand.” Smiling, I hug her back.“We can stay for a cuppa. Come on, Freya. Get a little warmed up before we go.” Sarah smiles at her. I am guessing this is her way of trying to talk to me and be a mum before she leaves.“I guess so. I just don’t want to be driving too late in the snow.” Freya walks in and sits down. Sarah walks over to me.“How are you?”Looking at her, I smile, as fake as it is. I am trying to be nice. The times she has been around me, she has made a point of making me aware she dislikes me and Jackson being together. I can only imagine what she would have to say knowing about everything else that has happened.“I am really good, thanks, Sarah. Just trying to concentrate on the business, girls and Jackson. How have you been?” I really am not bothered, but I feel I need to ask her back to be polite.“Good. I was hoping you woul
After what feels like hours later, but in fact, was only 30 minutes, the door opens. Looking up, he walks in, totally confused by me waiting for him. “Erm, what is this?” His question shows how shocked he is by what I have done. “Well, I found the bag that said ‘Kitten’ on in your playroom, so I brought it back here and put it on.” Smiling at him, I want to laugh but I won’t. Slowly, he walks towards me, climbing onto the bed next to me. His lips caress with mine, showing his love for me. His hand grasps mine, pulling them above my head and I feel the restraints wrapping around my wrists. “Ah, no, that can come after.” Pulling my hands away, I push him over, climbing on top of him. My energy spikes as I push him down, my hands ripping open his shirt, slowly kissing down his body, my hands unfastening his trousers, pulling them down. Lowering my head, I look up into his eyes. “Actually…” Moving back up, I grasp his
**TW** In this chapter Alena talks about her past abuse by Max. Now is the time to tell him. How has today made me want to share my worst and darkest secrets with him? “When I met Max, he was like you. I don’t mean you’re the same, but he was dominating. I began reading up on it then, just about Dom’s. The first few months were fine then I realised he was shouting at me more, rather than giving demands like you do. He shouted them at me and if I refused, he would punish me: cold showers, no internet, even when I said the safe word he continued. I realised then he was not real, he was not the Dom he had said he was to draw me in. Eventually, when I refused and he realised the punishments no longer made me cry, he started hitting me. Then, as I got stronger and was able to take a hit and stop myself from crying, it turned to punches and kicks.” Can I really keep going? Keep sharing my story with him? From here, it gets worse and I don’t know how I will co
He guides me with the lead, helping me lower to my knees. “I want you on all fours. If you jump, I will use the crop on you, Kitten. Do you understand?” Nodding, I understand, and then I remember I need to speak. “I understand, Daddy.” Smiling, the tears fall from my eyes while his hand strokes my back. “Good.” His hand continues to stroke my back. Lifting away from the skin, nothing is touching me. Suddenly, something frozen touches my back and I jump in response. The sting of the crop hitting across my back where the ice was, tells me he noticed. The Ice slides up my back to my shoulder. My body shivers and jumps from the sensation. The ice is removed and the sting of the crop makes me jump as it hits my shoulder. My body relaxes even more, the ice no longer on my skin, his hand stroking my back. Suddenly, the ice touches my nipple. Jumping, I yelp from the coldness. The crop hits my nipple twice. Relaxing, I try to stop myself
Turning, he grabs the knife and a slight panic rises within me. The tip of the blade slowly scratches down my arms, not enough to cause bleeding, yet the feel of the metal and scratching feels amazing. Lifting the knife, he does the same on the other arm: the scratch from the shoulder all the way down. “Okay?” Jackson looks at me. Nodding, I agree. “Yes, totally fine” He smiles at my confirmation, the knife pushing slightly harder as he pulls it down my arm, a few faint spots of blood showing. It isn’t hurting. It feels like a scratch. The needles and whip caused more pain. His other hand grabs the ice, rubbing it down the scratch. A moan escapes my lips as the toys continue to vibrate. Reaching the end of the scratch, the crop hits hard against the scratch. As I moan, he places the knife between my breasts. He gently pushes down, pulling the knife across my skin down to my naval. My body tenses with pleasure as he does. His other hand follows w
“I kind of snuck your pills. I didn’t want to fall asleep and not give you the whip.” A cheeky smile is on my face as I try to reassure myself that if I did that, he would laugh it off, tell me not to do it again and move on. I was wrong. He is shocked and looks angry right now. “Are you crazy? They are the ones we take on a mission when we know we can’t sleep. Sometimes I would be up for nearly forty-eight hours with just one, Alena!” His head lowers to his hands. Shaking his head at me, he sighs at me. Okay, maybe I was wrong about how he would react. All they are, are energy pills. It’s not like I took something illegal. “How many did you take?” Okay, now I feel I should lie, but knowing my luck he will have counted how many were in the tub. “I took two.” A laugh escapes my lips. Looking up at him through my lashes, my mouth is tight as I fight off the smile. I am awake, aren’t I? Having fun as well. It seems they are good a