Chapter 40: So Lost

I was not my usual self while preparing breakfast this morning. After spending days in the hospital, I was finally charged out, and now, I’m here alone in this adequate house. I haven’t seen Ethan for days. I have no idea where he might be. However, my mind is coasting elsewhere, and I couldn’t rest for days because of the nightmares haunting me. I couldn’t even blink or close my eyes for five minutes. All I’m seeing is that frightful scene that keeps on rehashing in my mind. The guilt was sneaking through my system until it consumed my whole willpower, and presently I couldn’t think straight.

I know it’s neither of our faults, but still, we failed to protect our unborn child. I can’t live forever with this guilt I am carrying. Each time I had the chance to shut my eyes, my body trembled with agitation. I sometimes see myself crying on the floor, begging for this to stop. It’s like bottling up all my feelings