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52. FOR THE ANTIDOTE

~RUBY

I wandered around in the house like a ghost, trying really hard to not cry.

I didn't want Ella to see me this way, so I was grateful that she was in the hospital,

'The Ruby I know is a monster. SHE IS A FUCKING MONSTER,' Ethan's voice rang in my head as I went from room to room, unable to settle down.

I can't even imagine how much Ethan hated me now, and my heart seemed to be in an unending abyss.

He wouldn't understand. He didn't even want to understand. My actions made him into a monster, and now...now...

I don't even know what to think.

I wished he had given me a chance to explain though. I wanted him to understand. I wanted my husband to look into my eyes, see my anguish, and tell me that he understood.

I just wanted his understanding.

But it seemed all I would be getting was shattered glasses, and broken hearts.

I wanted to sink down to the floor, and die. I didn't regret what I did. All I wanted to do was to save my best friend, and if I was tr
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