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Avoiding A Fight

Christopher

I stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around my waist. Usually, a shower made me feel alive. It was like getting an infusion of the strongest coffee. Not today. I had thought long and hard about skipping class. I didn’t want to get out of bed. I didn’t want to face life. I just wanted to stay in bed with the blankets pulled up to my chin.

The world felt darker today than it had in a really long time. The way I was feeling was very reminiscent of how I had felt in the weeks after Carlie’s death. I had felt so empty and alone. I didn’t realize how much I had come to count on the little texts from Leila before we went to bed each night or how good it felt to have another adult to talk to.

In many ways, saying goodbye to Leila was a lot like losing another person I cared about. I wasn’t sure if it was better or worse that I would be able to see her on occasion. It would be like rubbing salt in a wound. I couldn’t have her. I couldn’t pop over to her classroom and tal
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