◇ KEL ◇ Present Day
New York◇ KEL ◇ Power through. Mind over matter."You escaped death. You're invincible." Those words became the pretentious mental conditioning I fed my traumatized brain for weeks on end, until I was able to shut off the dreadful memories and my life felt normal again. Somewhat normal at least. I had to. Otherwise I might've ended up in a psychiatric ward. Alone. Ill. Ensnared and paralyzed by evil thoughts and horrifying images of that night. I had to fight it all off and push through with my life. I kept telling myself that I was fine. That I was past it. Until it eventually became the reality in my mind. The pretense became loathsome and felt ridiculous at times, but... It was necessary. My family shouldn't know what happened back in San Pietro. My mother would go berserk. No doubt they'd push me to press charges against the perpetrator. It would entangle Enzo into the whole mess. He'd be dragged into the investigation and might even have to testify in court against his brot
◆ MAGNUS ◆ American soil. Finally. After weeks of lonesome, anxious, sleepless nights in unfamiliar territory... Going home never felt so easy and gratifying until now. At long last. Broad daylight. Free to drive around the city. No unwanted company. No gun-toting punks tailing me everywhere I went. Even better: no demeaning mafia boss telling me what to do. Bossing me around every way he could. Shit. I missed this place and the anonymity. Nothing like living your days and nights of your own accord. Driving to wherever you wanted. Whenever you felt like it. Except now I only had one destination in mind: Evonne. She should be home. Alone. Waiting for me? Highly unlikely, but I still hoped for it. Days on end, I'd been waiting for this, hoping and praying hard for things to go back to normal. I wasn't even the religious type. That last argument shouldn't matter. Shouldn't be the deal-breaker. Things were looking up again. I stepped on the accelerator, letting a smile stay on my
◇ KEL ◇ New York 9:29PM "How's Miles?" "Better," Niccolo sighed over the phone. "You sure?" I sat on the couch as I watched my Mommy Tilda tidy up the small dining table, unsure whether I should mention that I was on the phone with Niccolo, Miles' ex-boyfriend. She'd definitely ask a barrage of questions I didn't have the will or courage to answer. I'd rather not mention that I was also friends with Niccolo. Otherwise I might bring up some highly confidential facts about the Falcos and their elaborate involvement with the Italian mob families. My mother had cooked dinner and practically forced me to eat more than usual, knowing I was mentally and physically exhausted from our training. Clinical rotations, still. Mom said she would only be staying here for two days
◇ KEL ◇ "Are you frickin' kidding me? Why didn't you just tell me you needed more money? I could've asked Dad." I plugged my earphones in and sighed to myself, minding my best friend's incredulous tone and apparent disappointment in my recent decisions. Although I knew that Gaia's family had some real estate properties under their name, I never tried to borrow money from her or her family for my tuition, student loans, and some of Daddy Jim's hospital bills. I just didn't want to inconvenience them in any way. For the past few years, Gaia had also been busy studying for the bar exams. Clearly she thought I should've just asked her for financial help, instead of borrowing a huge amount of money from Enzo, a guy I just met some months ago. Her point was valid. But, too late for reprimands. I had already paid for loans and hospital bills using Enzo's money. I definitely planned to pay him back as soon as I earned my first paychecks, though. It might take me another year and a
◇ KEL ◇1) Study.2) Eat.3) Sleep.4) Study.5) Pass the assessments.6) Complete the trainings.7) Study some more.Rinse.Repeat.It was my routine for the past months, and more or less a full-time job I was tied to. Then, in just a couple of months, we would have to seriously prepare for the Shelf Exam. No doubt sleep and I would be having more daily arguments by then."So proud of you, sweetie. Just keep up the momentum. Get enough sleep, eat healthy, exercise..." It was my mom's repetitive advice every time she'd see me struggling mentally and emotionally.The 'exercise' part, I had been ignoring quite often—only because I preferred to read books in bed for hours than going to the gym by myself."Always here if you need me or a workout buddy," Gaia would say. "But I'm too busy right now so we're just gonna have to stick with texts and scheduled calls," she would also say.No biggie. I knew why she was too busy. Like Miles. This year being my third year in medical school, I wouldn
◆ MILES ◆ Brichese, Italy "What now?" "He's livid. He's going to kill me this time." Okay... Death threats at eight in the morning. Great. Just commonplace for anyone in the business, it seemed. Sleepless and enduring another headache, I opened the garage door to let a seething Niccolo in. Between the two of us, I had often been the unpredictable one. The one with daily mood swings, temperament issues. Except for that time when he tried to piss off my father by blackmailing me, Niccolo was my total opposite: he practiced restraint and behaved more maturely. Smart and never a slave to impulses. The type to think rationally before making a move. Almost always in control of his emotions. Until now. The guy looked like he just walked out of a crime scene. We stepped inside my garage to hide from the bodyguards. Some privacy would be necessary. From the look on his face alone, he didn't need to say that something drastic and unlawful happened before he got here. The unmistakable t
◇ KEL ◇ The next day, after spending a few hours in our campus library, I decided to go home early for a change, too tired to burn more mental energy on General Surgery books. Also, I was failing to manage another anxiety attack. No surprise there. It had been a difficult couple of months without Miles around. He used to be my Xanax. Spending time with him was always better than taking anti-depression meds. He almost always knew how to cheer me up and he helped me overcome my inner demons countless times. I loved him for that. Too bad he couldn't stick around anymore. Sometimes I really missed him that it would upset me how I couldn't hang out with him anytime I want. I couldn't call him up every day because I knew he was busy with a lot of work—his father clearly wanted Miles to earn his pay, and not get handed money simply because he was the boss' son and only child. So I made a conscious choice to keep our communications to a minimum. As busy as Miles was, I had to dedicate most