84TH HEARTBEAT

JORDI ADKINS

I don’t how things are going to be better after this or if things are even going to get better. It’s just how or if. That is the hovering question.

Am I going to be okay right after this?

I asked the question to myself obviously not having any idea for an answer. It was surely a difficult thing to accept the lingering reality that Xavier Rockwell just ended our relationship over what I did. It was a short-lived one per se and I guess that’s part of the reason why I’m having a hard time to let his words sink in.

“We’re done. Get over it.”

I was still on the bus trying to calm myself down from crying but Xavier’s words kept on bouncing back and forth inside my head. This was the very first time that I have fallen in love with someone and it’s the kind of love that I’ve been dreaming of. The tight hugs and warm kisses, the stolen glances every time we are in class together, the aggressively unbridled display of affection every time we are alone. All of those things, I’m goin