Chapter 1: So Many Things I Hate

IRIS' P. O. V

There was a reason why Massimo Scavo was known to be a ruthless underground crime boss. He was a predator, and I was the unfortunate prey, bound to him by debt and a ring.

On a cold Wednesday morning, his hand travelled down my hips and slid between my thighs.

“No!” I gritted out, trying to close my legs, but a chunk of his two hundred pound body was already wedged between them. “Please, Massimo stop!”

But he didn’t.

Instead, his hand went further up my thighs, drawing up my silk robe. “Massimo, please! We aren’t married yet! This wasn’t part of the deal!”

My fiancé paused and looked at me with merciless, dark brown eyes, then he gripped my chin roughly. “You’ll soon be my wife anyway, so why not get this over with. Mhm?” His hot breath fanned my ears as his hand brushed against my panties, causing panic to settle deep within my bones. 

I looked at his disgusting face and wondered why I couldn’t have been engaged to someone good-looking. At least if he were half as handsome as my one-night stand, then I wouldn’t have minded letting him have his way. But the reality was that I was engaged to an ugly brute and as he kissed on my neck, I tried to imagine it was my one-night-stand. 

I tried to recall the memories of that night and how good it had been to be touched by him. With a crushing clarity, it immediately dawned on me that Massimo will never compare because, deep down, that my one-night stand had ruined my taste for any other man.

“Massimo,” I whine, trying to push his hand down and away, but he wouldn’t budge.

“Shut up!” He gripped the fabric of my panties and that panic within gave way to anger, and before I could stop myself or think things through, I placed a hand on his face and one on his chest and pushed back with all my strength. Surprisingly, he staggers back, but the cold, stark realization that I had just fucked up immediately dawned on me.

Massimo turned to me with a glare meant to kill, and despite knowing what was coming, I still wasn’t ready for the hand connecting with my face.

It came like thunder, sending me to the ground, and with it came a stinging pain originating from my cheek. Instinctively, I touched it when I felt warmth trickling out and just as I feared, Massimo had busted my face open with his ring studded hand.

His eyes carried fire as he glared down at me. “Get up!”

A sob escapes me. "Massimo, please!" He bends down and grabs me by the front of my robe, his hand poised to strike me again.

"Boss." A voice called, and my gaze slid to a man in his late fifties with greying hair, wearing the familiar emotionless gaze that all of Massimo's men carry.

"What?!" Massimo snapped.

"He's here."

"Tell him to wait in my office!"

The man hesitated, his eyes fell on me and I pleaded with him with mine. Something flashed in his expression, and I didn't miss the quick curl of his hands into fists. Massimo turned back to him, probably shooting him a death glare, making the man nod before leaving.

Massimo turned back to me, and my heart rate spiked at the thought of him striking again. Instead, he let me go with a heavy breath, and I almost sigh in relief. “Clean that up!” He pointed at my face before leaving the room. I had no idea, I was holding my breath, until he left, and then the sobs came out in angry tears. Noticing splotches of blood staining my robe, I got up and headed for the bathroom.

Going for the first-aid kit is automatic.

I’ve done this too many times to count and as I stared back into puffy, pale green eyes, I wondered how I ended up here. I used to be a star reporter at the height of my career and on track to a great life, until…well, I closed my eyes, trying to shut down the horrid memory that destroyed my life. Out of habit, I touch my pendant and open it to see a picture of three young ladies. It was taken right after we graduated from high school and had high hopes for ourselves.

I was in the middle, while my two best friends were on either side of me. The one to my right was Hilda Pérez, a brunette with almond shaped eyes, and a beautiful smile, while the one on my left was easily the most beautiful of us three.

Mary Petrov was blonde with big blue eyes and an innocent look about her. The both of us had moved to the big city to further our studies, while Hilda had stayed behind.

As a consequence, Mary and I had got to be more like sisters, and we were doing just fine…until that tragic night when she got shot and ended up in a coma.

Before the incident, Mary had been shortlisted for an internship in London, and it was what we were going to celebrate that night. I never expected things to go wrong. I never expected to be the reason why Mary got shot.

Tears spring to my eyes as I remember the events of that night. It had been tragic and awful and downright heartbreaking, and I was to blame for it all.

I became filled with guilt as I let myself have a moment where my sobs were muffled by one hand while I hugged myself with the other.

When I was finally able to calm down, I closed the pendant and sent up a quick prayer for Mary’s pull through. Her mother had informed me earlier that Mary would be undergoing surgery today and that it could possibly wake her up and stop her internal bleeding.

Making quick work of cleaning up my wound, I proceeded to my bedroom to apply makeup and get ready for the day.

Knowing Massimo would throw a fit if I am not ready before him, I quickly touch-up my makeup and get dressed in a simple black dress, with black elbow-length gloves and a black hair-fascinator.

Today was a day of mourning for the Scavo family, which meant Massimo and I were going to the funeral of his brother, who was also a Don. Before leaving my room, I made sure my wound was perfectly buried under a ton of concealer.

I hated that I had gotten good at hiding my scars.

Sadly, since I got engaged to Massimo, there are so many things I hate about myself now.