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160
Tears blind me as the elevator hits the ground floor and I take a moment to compose myself fully. Using the backs of my hands to stem the tears and blot my face without smearing it more. Trying to use the reflection of the chrome doors to clean myself up and wipe my liner and mascara from under my eyes and hide them mess on the black part of my dress. I have always been good at a quick recovery and manage to bring myself to calm and presentable in mere minutes of deep breaths and gulps. Shaking myself, pushing the pain into a deep dark hole that is turning my body icy and my heart numb. Hysteria drying up as logic boots me in the arse.
You should have seen this coming, Camilla. You should have never believed in him.
I make my way through the hall, head down to avoid security taking a good look and glad Jackson isn’t milling around here. He has a day off. I slide into the main part of the club which is crowded with staff doing the daily prep for tonight,
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I stand for the longest time in the kitchen area of the lower floor, knowing I’m delaying the inevitable. Alexi upstairs barging around like a crazed panther and looking to take it out on the person who just publicly disobeyed and humiliated him. I can almost visualise him in all his vicious glory. Caged, wild and ferocious while his family try to contain the eruption.We were to be a secret … I have made that impossible now. I feel like I can’t breathe, lungs constricted and wrapped in chains. My body is heavy, running cold with the profound acceptance that this will only end badly for me, and I can’t stop shivering. I’m so jittery. Avoiding him is delaying what I deserve but facing him is a fate worse than death.I need air; I need space; I need solitude. My head is spinning a million miles an hour and the pain from his ‘date’ revelation is numbing out as logic and sense filter through to give me a massive s
The Carrero Contract (series book 3) 162
These are not Alexi’s men. These are men who have obviously been watching the club and waiting for an opportunity to arise. I just gave them all of me, with my own stupidity. God knows how long they have been hanging at a distance watching the comings and goings in case they got a chance at picking me off. It’s horrifying to imagine they may have been out here this whole time, waiting for a time like this.I glance at him moving in and the man from the car is now behind me, blocking my path. Aware of both and my senses telling me how far away from actually touching me they are. More aware of the one behind me as it instils a higher fear factor, but my brain calms and the part that works well in a crisis moves in to formulate an exit strategy. Eyes doing a quick scan of every avenue around me. Adrenaline kicking in and I do what I do best. Lift my fucking feet and run like a bat out of hell crazy woman with no desire to die, to my right, down the alley I had come l
The Carrero Contract (series book 3) 163
Alexi’s apartment is huge. Walking in the door, ushered by four big burly men I know from the club and all in complete silence. I don’t even take the time to acknowledge them individually or even look up past black heavy coats and wide chests to recognise each one. Just a group of intimidating security in matching outfits and earpieces who escorted me from car door to apartment door.I have no words anyway. Dishevelled, filthy and broken inside as I’m led into a massive open plan penthouse apartment that I would never think of putting Alexi in. A building in Upper Manhattan’s most luxurious area.It’s warmer and homelier than the décor of the club, with
The Carrero Contract (series book 3) 164
I like this apartment; it somehow seems like I have been here before even though I have never laid eyes on it. I love the open space and simple furnishings. Nothing overly showy or flashy, nothing fussy. Just enough to feel comfy and relaxed in a way that invites you to come in and lounge your cares away. It’s peaceful and feels like home, even though I’m a stranger within its walls.It’s no surprise I like it though; one thing I found when making the club gorgeous was that Lexi and I have a similar taste in décor, and we gel well in terms of style. We can argue about most things, but we never argued over styling choices.I waste no time in sinking into the hot bath
The Carrero Contract (series book 3) 165
“Why do you think I react so badly when you hurt me? Why I run when I think you might do something to make me want to leave you? I’m scared because you can hurt me in ways no one has ever had the ability to do. And you don’t even need to touch me to do it. I act like an idiot because of how I feel about you!”He just stands stock still and stares at me as though I have two heads, or he didn’t quite hear me correctly. Both of us feet apart, motionless and he just continues to lock those eyes on me for what seems like the longest time. Penetrating my skull as that clever brain ticks and turns over whatever he is thinking about. A return to deadpan, calm and still. Temper evaporating away to nothing. He reverts inside his own head and simmers to a deathly silence in the quietness of the room.“Do you?” It’s soft, unsure, and I can almost taste the apprehension and fear in those two little words. The same fear from the
The Carrero Contract (series book 3) 166
I just gaze half amused and raise my brows at him to communicate my deep lack of being impressed. He seems to get the hint and relents with a chuckle and a wink.Alexi lifts himself over me on his strong muscular arms and gazes at me for a long moment, once again stopping the shenanigans and making me even more impatient.“You on top.” It’s more of a suggestion than an outright command, and I frown at him a little before moving to change positions without question. Forgetting the whole tosser thing and just eager to get him inside me.It is a preferred position for me as it makes you feel like a man’s penis is reaching so much further and you get to control what’s being done. Not that I think with him it will be needed, although I’m sure it will be even more mind-blowing in this new position for us.Alexi has never instigated me on top any of the times we had sex and it’s not a coincidence. I was in the game long
The Carrero Contract (series book 3) 167
I’m bored out of my mind, amusing myself since Alexi left, by watching Netflix in the main sitting room and sprawling out in my new domain. All on my lonesome with the lights on low, the glowing fireplace creating a beautiful ambience in front of me and the sweeping lights of night-time New York to my right. It's semi-dark, peaceful in a cosy and homely sort of way and I’m utterly relaxed in my surroundings. The couches are deep, comfy and large so I’m laid out like Cleopatra and enjoying the size of his massive TV in full HD and an endless list of channels. This place was made for relaxing and I adore it.For a guy who doesn’t do much of it, he certainly kitted this place out as though he intended to. I wonder if now we are a thing, he will make an effort to spend more time here and try to sit down occasionally and do ‘couple’ things, like watching a movie. He did it the night Feral died and it gives me hope that maybe he might acclimatise
The Carrero Contract (series book 3) 168
I jump, awakening in a dark silent room as the weight on my legs shifts heavily and emits a long low growl. It makes my heart stop, skin prickling all over, suddenly frightfully aware as I get my bearings and remember where I am and what the hell is lying on me. Pulse quickening as I groggily come to, a cold sweep of blood due to the abrupt manner I awoke in the eerie room, lacking any TV noises. The illumination of the city view is subtler than I would have expected and not casting a great deal of light at all.His low grumble puts an instant fear of me God in me and I try to focus on him towering over me by pushing myself to half propped up and stare at the beast.I must have fallen asleep with that movie and the TV has gone into standby and switched off. It’s dark as hell, and it dawns on me as I look around to figure out what’s happening the shades must be activated by light or a timer as they have all come down two-thirds of the way, so this room is al
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