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5. Amaya

"You must be joking, Mom," I told my mother after hearing the request she made. She wasn't just asking me to set aside my beliefs, but to give a chance to a man who spoke of righteousness, rights, values, and more, yet lacked respect for his own family through an affair. Moreover, he led one of the criminal organizations causing the most harm to the world.

This was outrageous!

"No, I'm really letting you know, your father wants to see you, and you should go. The meeting is going to happen, whether you want it or not, and for me, the best thing you could do is approach your father without him being forced to do it," she answered seriously, with a touch of concern in her voice. "He... He wants to mend things, Amaya, so just give him a chance."

"I'm sorry, but a person who keeps me as his dirty secret doesn't deserve a chance," I replied and hung up on my mother as quickly as I could, tired of even considering that she might be insistent. Before my father no longer directly interfered in my life, he had told me that I couldn't completely distance myself; that when he needed me, I had to show up, no matter what. A situation that wasn't just bad, it was a disaster that I hadn't taken his word on, but I wouldn't fall for his game.

I carried on with my own things.

I finished some university activities, reviewed some textbooks, and then turned on my iPad to read a romance comic about a woman in a world of beasts. I loved the way the authors portrayed the panels and crafted great stories. I was so engrossed that I even bought coins for the upcoming chapters. I read them with great satisfaction and then lay down, falling asleep and for some strange reason, thinking about the man from the library.

My subconscious had me dream that the mysterious man spoke to me while I touched myself. His words weren't sweet or refined; they were dirty, laden with desire.

I woke up to the sound of the alarm, feeling heated, with countless thoughts racing through my head in unimaginable directions. Part of me felt playful for having such ideas, yet another part felt ashamed to have reached that point.

I had never had boyfriends, dates, or partners for the simple reason that I knew what a broken heart looked like. For me, the world was not just about feelings but also intentions and desires. I had needs, but I knew myself well enough to understand that they weren't a priority. Opening the doors to men for new interactions would be a major problem, not just because of my fear and my perception of relationships, but because I knew perfectly well that as soon as I started seeing someone, my father would meddle. From a young age, during the many times he visited me secretly, he told me that any woman who respected herself would fulfill three fundamental things: she would respect her family, especially her parents; she would honor herself above all else; she would be a source of pride for herself.

These concepts weren't just tied to ancestral Yakuza traditions but also to a very narrow worldview. Trying to leave those principles behind was very difficult, given the circumstances. However, I couldn't easily let them go. If I got involved with someone my father didn't consider up to his standards, it would be a problem I didn't want to face or know about.

That's why I preferred to remain alone with my books.

They would never leave me alone; they wouldn't become a ticking time bomb.

I was ready to leave the dormitory and go straight to breakfast when my phone rang. I answered without looking, thinking it was my mother.

"We need to talk, suki."

The voice of the man who fathered me completely paralyzed me, furrowing my brow and clenching my fists.

"I'm sorry, but I have a life I'm not going to change for anyone," I retorted and hung up on him immediately.

I turned off my phone right away.

I never imagined that after making that decision, on my way to class, two suited men of Asian descent with stony expressions would approach me. Seeing the symbols on their hands, I knew they were Yakuza, so I swallowed hard.

" Ohayōgozaimasu, Amaya-sama, go dōkō negaimasu. O tōsama kara, chokusetsu o tsure suru yō ni to iwa rete imasu."

"I..."

I didn't even have time to respond; one of them gently took my arm and guided me through the campus to a waiting black limousine. I looked around to see if there was a crowd of people, and no, just a few passing by, caught up in their own affairs.

I took a deep breath and told myself I could deal with Hiroshi Yagami to get back to my routine of English, reading, and consuming Asian productions while eating smuggled ramen in my room.

"Please," said the other man, attempting to get me into the limousine, so he opened the door with chivalry as the other one circled around and got in on the passenger side. Then the man who had been waiting for me extended his hand, and I immediately declined it.

"Hitori demo ī," I snapped, annoyed.

I got in and found myself facing my father. He was red with anger. I knew him well, so I didn't back down, knowing he hated having someone hang up on him. So, I stared back at him and sat apart from him. However, when I looked to my left, at the other end of the limousine, I saw a face I never thought I'd see in person.

My confusion must have been evident because Hiro, my father's eldest son, my half-brother who was ten years older than me, just burst out laughing.

"God, I thought this was all some cruel prank, Father, but this goes way beyond anything I ever thought you could do," he said, amused, and I felt uneasy.

"Hiro, you're going to confuse Amaya..."

"I didn't confuse her. You must have confused her. Does the girl even know...?"

"That's enough!" our father cut him off. "We came to fetch her. I'll fill her in on everything when we get home."

That made me tilt my head and look him directly in the eyes.

"What do you mean by 'home'?" I asked.

"Oh, Father! This is so fun to witness..."

"Shut up, Hiro," our father reprimanded him before letting out a deep sigh. "I wanted to handle things civilly with you, Amaya, but since you refuse to even see me, then we'll do it my way. We're going to Los Angeles. I need to introduce you to the council immediately."

"You must be joking..."

"That's exactly what I said on the way here when he told me an interesting story about having a child out of wedlock and the Yakuza," Hiro commented as if it were nothing, and my heart raced.

"I don't want to go. I have my life, my degrees, my dreams, my exams..."

"I'll take care of that for now. Just stay calm, daughter. I need you to calm down, be strong, and show the composure that defines you," Hiroshi asked me.

"Don't try to make me look like an idiot," I snapped angrily, and I saw Hiro smile with delight, as if he hadn't expected this kind of attitude. "You're kidnapping me, you're taking me away from my life to..."

"To present you to my world and have you swear loyalty," he replied without mincing words.

That sent a brutal shock through me. It couldn't be true.

Japanese phrases:

—Good morning, Miss Amaya. We need you to come with us. Your father has asked us to take you directly to him.

—That's okay on my own.

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