Chapter 38

I went to the grocery store yesterday, and I was scared to death. Some kid dressed up for Halloween and looked just like my attacker. I had a complete meltdown in the middle of the store. What does that say about me? Even I can tell I've been shaken ever since. I don't think I've been this fragile since the actual attack. Last night I barely slept at all. I even heard Tyler come to bed. I've never heard him come in the room before. I'm so on edge, I don't know what to do. I feel like I need to reclaim some piece of myself, but I'm not sure how to do that. I want to feel like I can protect myself and hold it together. I need some kind of outlet besides writing because I feel rage beginning to overtake my personality. I'm starting to get angry and I don't want to take that out on Tyler. He admitted to me that he's been boxing with Layne. That they beat the shit out of each other and that's the only way he can come to me without the anger. I'm not sure that it's healthy, but it's got to b