Zara’s POV
In the morning, Amy comes into my room with apple juice and smooths down my hair to wake me up. My eyes feel puffy and Lavender is trying to take away a headache.
“Good morning, sleepyhead. Keller had to take care of some work things, so you and I will get to spend the day together.” Her voice is soft as looks at me with worry. “We need to go shopping for you today. Why don’t you get freshened up? I’ll meet you in the kitchen.”
“Okay,” I take her hand in mine and bow my head to her, “Amy, thank you for staying last night. I-it means a lot to me.”
“Zara, I know you feel very alone, but I assure you, you’re not. Keller is here for you and so are Phil and I.” She pauses and scratches her head. “Jensen and Skylar will come around. I wouldn’t hold out a lot of hope for their mates.”
“Did Keller tell you what happened when I saw my mom?” I swallow my tears back.
“He did, and if I’m going to be very honest, it was
Amy takes me to a large department store where several pleasant saleswomen help me find clothes. I try to look at the tags to see how much everything costs, but they won’t let me. I try on outfit after outfit, coming out of the dressing room each time. Amy gives a yes or no to each one. The sales woman pick out a navy blue dress for my trial and a white sweater with a light blue skirt to wear for Keller’s. Amy looks more somber when she sees them but approves of both. They find blush colored ballet flats that don’t look like they’re from the children’s department, which Amy agrees will have to do for now. After a couple hours of shopping, I have more than enough clothing to last me for the next six months. Amy picks up a new winter coat for Keller. When we finish shopping, we go to a small cafe for lunch. I order a cup of tomato soup. Amy nudges my arm and adds a grilled cheese for me. I scrunch up my nose, but my mom would have done the same thing. When the food act
Keller’s POV “I-I can stay with her, Mom.” I watch Zara while she grimaces and talks in her sleep. Mom and I have both tried to wake her up, but it was a useless effort. She woke up for a moment and said something about finding a solution and fell back asleep. Whatever she’s dreaming about, it’s upsetting her and it’s painful to watch. “I don’t want to leave her.” “Keller, if I can feel your anxiety, imagine what she is going through right now!” Mom’s tone changes as she becomes protective of Zara. “Go take a walk.” “Mom-“ I stand up and feel myself take a step back. After twenty-two years, I know what comes next. ‘Take a walk’ is Mom’s warning that Lily isn’t happy. In a flash, Lily comes to the surface, throwing an arm across Zara’s body. Her eyes turn black, and she snarls at me with long fangs. “Get. Back.” “Okay, okay! I get it, Lily!” I raise my hands up and back out of the room, closing the door behind me.
The next morning, they deliver the whiteboards. Zara is so over the moon excited, she stays out of the way, but doesn’t hide from the delivery man. As soon as he’s gone, she immediately puts them to use. I bring out a step stool for her so she can reach the top parts. She works furiously until it’s time to go to the lawyer’s office. She worries over her outfit to wear out for the day and changes three times, even though I tell her she looks fine. She video calls Mom to get her opinion. Then she goes back to the bathroom to adjust her hair. I’m not stupid. This is sigma fight mode. “Pocket, come on. You can fix your hair in the car.” I stand in the doorway to her bathroom with my arms crossed over my chest. “I, uh, I just need another couple more minutes.” She looks in the mirror nervously. Her cheeks are flush while she messes with the ends of her hair. “Zara, look at me.” I step forward and lean against the counter. She holds her brush wi
Even though we had talked about her going to bed early, she was on a roll in the living room, so I didn’t bother her. It was close to midnight when I find her asleep on the sofa in front of her laptop. I crouch down in front of her and slide the computer off her lap. I take a moment to cherish her delicate features before I lean forward and caress my fingers across her cheek. How is it possible for her to become more beautiful every day? “Time for bed, Pocket.” I use a quiet tone so I won’t startle her. Part of me doesn’t want to wake her up. I would rather move her papers out of the way and snuggle up on the sofa with her. She opens her sleepy eyes for a moment and hums when she closes them again. “Is it morning?” “Not yet, but it’s pretty late.” I tilt my head and watch her try to wake up enough to go to her room. “Mmm, okay.” She opens her eyes again and smiles at me. “I stayed up too late. There’s still more to do.” I chuckle and take her
When she clears her throat and brushes a stray hair behind her ear, I’m finally able to form words again. She lets me help her onto a stool and waits for me to finish cooking. I serve her breakfast, then sit next to her, letting my knee brush against hers. I resist the urge to place my hand on her thigh. “What do you say we go into the forest today? Let Lavender and Rocky play for a bit. Or did you already have plans?” “I was just going to work on the solution in the living room,” she shrugs and takes another sip of coffee. “But it’s your birthday. If you want to go to the forest, I would be happy to join you. Lavender says she would love to go for a run, too. Do you know somewhere safe for us to go?” “Cool. We can go once you’re ready. I have a place I like to go where I let Rocky out to blow off steam. It’s pretty isolated. We won’t get interrupted.” I can’t help but grin and lean my elbow on the counter so I can put my chin in my hand. “I’m going to dinner
Zara lets me buckle her in after I help her into the car, but takes she my hand before I’m finished. “What changed your mind?” Her question catches me off guard. I look up at her and think of the best way to answer. She looks so tired. I wish I could give her my energy. Hopefully, after I accept her, she will start feeling better. If not, I’ll search the world for a doctor that can help her. “I think it’s more that I stopped changing my mind. I stopped trying to convince myself that I'm not good enough for you or that the differences between us are reasons to not be with you. Thinking about you leaving, not being able to talk to you or spend time with you, no more notes on the kitchen counter, spending my nights watching cartoons, or making sure I stock the fridge with apple juice instead of beer.” I shake my head resolutely and kiss her hand between my words. “I would be stupid to miss out on sharing my life with you, Zara. The more I get to know you, the more I see
****TRIGGER WARNING****The next four chapters depict ATTEMPTED SUICIDE, DRUG OVERDOSE, and STALKING.*****************************“Keller. Wake up. Blood. Our mate is hurt,” Rocky rouses me out of a deep sleep. I open my eyes groggily and look at the clock. Four seventeen a.m. It feels like a hammer is pounding on my head when I sit up.“Holy shit.” I try to open my eyes wider, but I can’t manage it. “What happened Rocky?”“Jensen drugged you. I don’t remember after that.” His voice sounds agitated. “It doesn’t matter. Our mate needs us.”“What are you talking about?” I yawn, but when I inhale, the distinct metallic scent wakes me up immediately. I look around at the three women passed out in the bed with me.
“ZARA?!” I call out, panicking and sniffing the air for her rose and chamomile scent. I follow my nose to the bathroom. “Zara?” I crack the door open and peek in. I see her curled up next to the toilet. She looks clammy and her eyes are closed, her head is resting against the toilet seat. When she opens her eyes, she tries to look at me, but the movement upsets her stomach. She turns and vomits into the bowl. Well, mostly into the bowl. The smell of apple juice and a faint familiar sweet tang mixes with the pungent bile from her stomach. Oh fuck. This can’t be happening. I look at my watch. It’s four forty-five a.m. If she’s vomiting now, that means she took the drug before she cut herself. She must have mixed in it with the juice. “No no no no no, Zara, no no no…” I run over and kneel next to her, taking her face in my hands. Her head is heavy and her eyes try to roll back, but she’s fighting to keep looking at me. I use my sleeve to wipe