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Chapter 79
– I hope you will respect my decision, Kail.
After she finished packing her bags, Silje started writing a letter to Kail in her dark room. She had the lights turned off and only the desk lamp was on.
These were her last words to him:
– I don’t ever want to see you again. A lot has happened between us and although the memories of our time together could be remembered as sweet to one person, they will always cause me pain and heartache. I don’t want to feel such intense emotions about a person anymore. I don’t want to waste my time being drained by these feelings. From now on, I want to focus on my original plan of becoming independent… And that is why I don’t want to see you again, Kail. Let’s go our separate ways now. Please let me go. You need to release me. I know it won’t be easy for you to do it and no matter what I tell you, I know you will still search for me with dogged obsession until you have no cho
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She had a dream.A terrifying dream.In a frozen ocean with a white fjord, a large group of seals swam happily. In the icy water, the seals cried so loudly that her ears hurt. When she finally opened her eyes, she could still hear their cries.In her dream in the white winter ocean, the hunters shot their guns at the seals and suddenly, the water started to turn red.A beautiful clear ocean quickly turned into a bloodbath.No matter where she looked, all she could see was red. Suddenly, she heard a desperate cry.A mother crying after losing her young.A father crying after losing his mate and his young.The surviving seals fought the hunters viciously to survive and protect the remaining young.The bloody red ocean called out to her.“…!”When Silje woke up, her body was wet with her own sweat.It was dark in the room and she was panting. It was dark outside, which meant it was st
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Aunt Skina’s nagging was getting worse.Any other girl her age would’ve run away, screaming from the incredibly hard work. It was also a monotonous life, and Silje wondered if she would die here in Aunt Skina’s store like this someday.However, Silje was fine with it all. She didn’t want to think about anything.“Before you eat, make sure you pray, Silje. The pastor is supposed to visit us in the afternoon. Oh, and don’t forget to make the soup with spinach and carrots, ok?”Aunt Skina used to be a devout Norwegian Lutheran, but when she immigrated to America, she converted to Catholicism. Her dark house was decorated with crosses and the Virgin Mary statues.The house also reeked of a strange smell. Aunt Skina often suffered from sore throat and tonsillitis, and she drank an awful-smelling syrup for her conditions.Aunt Skina always insisted on a very long prayer before every meal.“Let
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“It’s delicious.”Sien took only one sip of her drink. Afterward, all she did was smoke.Surrounded by cigarette smoke, Silje felt dizzy, but she remained seated and didn’t move. The light in the place was a dim red and she could hear loud music from a distance. Greg the bartender was busy greeting and serving customers, but once in a while, he glanced at Silje with interest.Siena started to flirt with a male customer who was sitting to her, and Greg finally couldn’t ignore his curiosity anymore. He asked Silje, “Are you Sien’s friend?”Silje shook her head.Greg glanced at Sien disapprovingly and replied, “That’s what I thought. A girl like that wouldn’t have an innocent-looking friend like you.”Under the dim light, Greg studied Silje quietly.Her hair was down and she was wearing her usual oversized shirt and black slippers. She also wore a pair of black tight
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The man smiled again, showing off his beautiful white teeth. He tucked his business card in her hand and walked away with his group.Silje stared at them for a long time in confusion. She realized that this was the second time today that someone asked her the same question.Greg the bartender and this black guy.Model…She was barely surviving with her current life, so how could she even consider something like that?Silje shook her head.‘My photos on the wall? Where? My body needs to be celebrated?’How ridiculous. He seemed like a scammer, so without looking at the card, she crushed it and put it into her legging pocket.Bang, bang.The loud music continued.Coming to this place had unintentionally caused her consciousness to come back from the shock. Her mind and heart were frozen since that fateful day, but they were slowly thawing.Then suddenly, Silje heard a loud argument.
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“Oh! Yes! Thanks. It’s very close by.”Sien seemed excited and Silje said to her, “You better not pull anything like what you did at the club, got it? I won’t be used by the likes of you. Don’t mess with me.”Sien looked at her in fear as she took Silje to the rice noodle place.[Landing].It was a Vietnamese restaurant on the upper west side, and it boasted its affordable lunch menu. The place was decorated elegantly with red lights, bamboo umbrellas, and landscape paintings.It was very late in the night, but the restaurant was still very crowded. With so many people and music, it was a nice place to have a private conversation. Silje and Sien took a seat at a table.“This place has great food and it is open till late.”Sien pointed at different items on the menu in excitement. She said there were a few dishes Silje had to try so she ordered several of them. Silje wasn’t ve
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“Silje, where you do think you are going?”Aunt Skina yelled from behind, but Silje didn’t answer her. She just walked away like a ghost.The street was noisy with cars. Everything and everyone was still here, but Sien was gone.All these people and buildings were still standing, yet Sien was no more.Gone forever.Was this death? No big fuss. No noises, nothing.Just a meaningless reality.Death was just a quiet disappearance.Of course, it wasn’t that Silje liked Sien, but still, this wasn’t right. To die like this so suddenly…Silje couldn’t express her feelings. She was in such shock that she just kept walking.After a long aimless stroll, Silje returned home and when she was alone in her bedroom, she finally gave in to her grief. Sien’s death brought back so many painful memories.Standing in front of the frozen lake in Norway.Being sent away by
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Clack, clack.The sounds of her shoes echoed throughout the bar. As the customers drank their cocktails, they watched with interest as Silje did her very first walk.When she finished her walking, Greg laughed out loud.“Hahaha!”He grabbed his stomach in pain as he laughed so hard. Silje just looked at him quietly.She felt shy, but not embarrassed. She was determined, and something so small and trivial like this wasn’t going to get her. To get better, she just had to work harder.“Have you never walked before? Why would you walk like that with your back so stiff and your arms swinging side to side? Are you pretending to be an orangutan?”Greg mimicked an orangutan while swinging his arms, which made everyone in the room laugh.“You’re right. I have never done model walking before.”When Silje quietly agreed, Greg patted his beard and asked seriously, “Then have you
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