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Chapter Four : Touch And Fire

I uncontrollably sit on the ground. 

Apparently I fall.

"Hey, hey, you okay?" Edwin hurriedly sits beside me.

"I'm fine." I answer shakily, closing my eyes. Actually I wasn't fine. I haven't seen my psychiatrist for almost a month, haven't taken my medication. Now, the flashbacks are gone, but I still have the headache. 

I am breathing hard. 

I wonder what caused the flashbacks. 

"C'mon," he wraps my left arm around his shoulder and lifts me up. "The lake is near. You need some fresh air."

I walk with him, dropping my head in his shoulder. I feel a little surprised by my act, because I don't even know him.

Or maybe I do.

His body scent seems familiar. 

"Don't try to think too much. When you apply pressure to remember a thing of your past, which was maybe painful, it affects your neuron cells."

"It wasn't painful. Perhaps," I stop walking. 

And I open my eyes.

Suddenly the trees stop, emerging an unbelievable scenery. The lake is big enough, bigger than thousand meters. The water looks clean. There are some steps in front of us. Some wild, colorful flowers are expressing themselves around us.

The place is enchanting. Unbelievable. Beautiful. Quiet. Peaceful. Perhaps divine.

We both remain silent for a minute. Then Edwin breaks the silence. 

"The place is...." he pauses. 

"Many things in a one, yeah." I say, dropping my bag and sit on a step.

"How are you feeling now?"

I smile. "Much better."

He sits on a step too, then tilts his head to me.

"How did you find this lake?"

"Coach Timley gave me the address." Seeing his questioning eyes, I add, "Our swimming coach in school."

He nods.

I know that he already knows I am a swimmer. I wanted to ask why he searched for me, but I don't. He can G****e anybody.

Just curiosity...maybe.

"Woolly blue-curls." He points at the bush of evergreen shrubs beside him.

"Trichostema lanatum." I pull my black tops over my head and fold it. "Turn around."

I see him swallow, then after a moment he turns to the bush. "Are you sure you're okay to swim now? How about you rest for a while, eh?" 

"I am fine." 

"You know the scientific name of this wild flower," he says slowly. "You run, you swim. You instantly told some things about Calgary. Why do you know many things?"

I sigh.

"When I was little, I wanted to know what the other kids knew. Other people knew." I start to unbutton my jeans. "Maybe I wanted to be different. Maybe I wanted to do things which other kids didn't do. And I guess my memory is good, um, so I can memorize things easily."

"Your headache earlier.....does it happen often? Your memory loss?"

"No. It's__rare. Maybe I should start worry and go to see my doctor." I put off my tops.

"Whoa," he sneaks a glance at me.

"Don't look." I warn him, folding my jeans. 

And I dive into the water. 

The water is warm, comfortable and it starts to reduce my stress. I dive under, searching for the bottom, but it's full of aquatic plants. 

Then I come back to surface.

I push the water, examining the other bank from here, where the trees start again. The distance must be furtherer than five hundred meters. 

I turn to the steps, wanting to ask him a question. 

But he's not there.

I glance around. The lake is quiet. 

"Edwin?" I call loudly. "Edwin, where are you?"

I hear a small noise behind me, I spin.

He breaks the surface swiftly, laughing. 

"Not funny." I scowl. 

I was worried for a while. 

His laugh fades, now he's staring at me. 

I ignore his stare, I ignore his glowing skin in water, I ignore his smile.

"I didn't hear you dived," my scowl deepens. "You must be a good swimmer, then."

"You don't look happy," he replies. 

"Should I be?"

He doesn't say anything. 

"Why did you move from Canada?" I change the subject, waving my hands in the water. 

"Because I and my uncle thought that San Francisco would be a cool place," he laughs. 

I turn away from him.

You know, there's something seems wrong about him. Or maybe I am the wrong.

We continue swimming next ten minutes, both remain silent. He seems to enjoy the silence. And I?

I don't know, but the water feels good. So does the nature. 

"Why did you want me to come with you here, Sam?" Edwin suddenly asks.

I shrug, backstroking. "Does it matter?"

"Just asking. You don't even know me."

     There's another thing about me you should know. When I do something I don't think much about it. I just do it.

I give him a mysterious smile, then glance at my waterproof watch, wiping to see the time. It is noon. Time for my lunch. 

"I skipped two classes at the first day in my new school," he is floating. "Should I care?"

"If you're serious about your study, then you should. And if you're having fun and don't care even if the principal expels you, then you shouldn't."

He chuckles. "You're not serious."

I say nothing. 

He moves closer. "Look at the water."

I look at him, then look at the water. The sun is shining above our heads, creating our reflections on the water.

"It's beautiful," I chuckle quietly. 

"Tu I'es aussi," he whispers in French. 

Is he trying to be seductive?

I turn my stare to those dark green eyes, which are being shone by the sunlight, are telling me something. 

His face is dangerously close to mine.

I suddenly feel warm.

He tucks away some hair from my face gently and I can feel his breath, his lips barely touching mine.

I am already breathing heavily. 

"Edwin, what are you doing?" I whisper. 

"Kissing you," he whispers back.

His wet lips touch my forehead, then move to my left cheek. He kisses my right cheek. Then he slowly kisses my upper lip. 

I can feel his hesitation that he's trying be gentle. I put my arm around his neck, bringing him closer. I kiss him, after a while, he parts my lips with his and his tongue touches mine.

And I feel like I'm burning. 

He moves his hands to my hips and wraps my legs around his hip and I feel his naked body under the warm water. I don't stop him, I don't know why, I just kiss him harder and feel his moaning and heavy breathing. 

Desire is a strong feeling. 

He kisses the sensitive skin of my neck and I run my fingers in his wet, silky hair, biting my lower lip. 

Suddenly the flashbacks come back.

"Uhhh!" I scream and push him away.

My head is bursting with pain and I rub my forehead, wanting the pain and the images to fade away. 

The images.....

A boy__a boy with me, in the blunt images, laughing and smiling, my father talking and chatting with him, we eating dinner together, Emilia raising eyebrows at him.....

And my fingers brushing his lips.....

And suddenly I see his face, smiling....

I realize I'm not floating anymore. 

Then, everything goes black.

I collapse. 

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