As Jax made a full return to work, we all settled into the old routine with a few tweaks. The girls had been only staying overnight at Crystal’s house, but Jax seen fit to start giving her full weekends. He also now invited her to any school functions that the girls were involved in. Isabella told me on multiple occasions that she detested Crystal being there. She stated that Crystal made fun of her, and that she hated spending any time with the woman. Unfortunately, there was nothing I could do about the situation. Jax had made it abundantly clear that he did not want me to have anything to do with his children. He constantly made it a point to say that I was not a good role model. He would then go on to say that I was a whore, lazy, or a myriad of other foul comments.
Another blessing was that Jax was now easily tired, and barely had the strength to start a fight after working. I had known before that his job was physically demandin
When Jax had been admitted to the hospital I had taken a leave from my college classes. Once he returned to work part time, I had started my online classes again. I was able to keep up with the work, and quickly caught up on what I had missed. Now that Jax was back to work full time, I returned to college full time as well. Returning to classes also meant that I could return to group as well.I had formed warm acquaintances with most of the women at our group. Once you share the horrors of what you have endured with people, it is hard not to feel close to them. Upon my return I gave them the whole story of Jax’s ill health and why I had been away. I told them about Crystal and how she was back in their lives. I even told them about Helen and how the young girl now seemed to despise me. Jordan our group leader questioned whether Crystal was trying to use Helen to get back together with Jax. While that possibility had crossed my mind he
My birthday was in less than a week. I did not feel like celebrating. My depression was back in full swing, making it harder to keep up the farce that I had presented to the world about Jax and I. Jax was regaining his strength more, which was making life harder. I had not heard back from Frank regarding the farmhouse, and I had no new prospects for places to rent. Helen was continuing to scorn me, acting as if I were the reason her mother and father were not together. How convenient that she has forgotten that her parents were separated long before I ever came into the picture. Some days I wanted to flat out tell her that her mother could gladly have the monster that her father was. All I wanted anymore was peace.Jax had a brand-new complaint that he blamed me for. One of the medications that the cardiologist put him on was causing erectile dysfunction. According to Jax though the reason he could not get his member to work was because I w
WARNINGThe following chapter contains acts of physical, mental, and sexual abuse. These acts may be triggers to some readers. Please continue with caution.Birthdays are supposed to be a celebration of being alive. It is a reflection of living another year, and the accomplishments that go with it. Some see it as a time for reflection, looking back on how much you have grown as a person. I truly believe that no one thinks that they are going to come face to face with death on their birthday. Fate is a tricky beast though and sometimes she has to bite you in order to push you over the ledge and into your destiny.I was abruptly awakened on my birthday to the feeling of Jax straddling me, and cold metal being pressed against my temple. My breathing stopped, in fact it felt as if time i
I crawled into the bathroom incredibly sore from everything that occurred this morning. What a hell of a way to be spending a birthday. I did not even bother trying to keep quiet. I ran warm water in the sink, a vain attempt to wash him off my body. Disgust, shame, and anger broiled up inside of me that I soon found myself emptying the contents of my stomach in the toilet.My mind and my emotions are in a hurricane storm within my body. The tears flow freely, I do not even bother trying to wipe them away. I have no idea where I am going to go, but I know that I need to get out. The truth literally hit me in the face this morning. Even living in a shelter would be better than this.Walking back into the room, I am relieved that Jax is still passed out, snoring loudly still clutching the gun in his hand. I quickly grab my go bag, which is packed with a few clothes and important papers. I do not bother to close the doo
The kids were excited as I pulled into Emily’s driveway. Levi commented that she had enough space to run dirt bikes, and four wheelers on. Looking around I had to admit that I was slightly jealous of the space that Emily did have. The farm was easily twenty acres of land, and Levi was right it was perfect for dirt bikes, and other off-road toys.Emily was standing in the driveway waiting for us as we got closer to the house. The kids jumped out of the car excited to explore the new area. Emily walked over and embraced me as I got out of the car. For a brief moment in time, I knew I was safe. As I wrapped my arms around her, I allowed the tears to flow freely from my eyes. I knew that Emily understood everything that I was going through, and that she would not mind me getting her sweatshirt wet with my tears. She held me tight until the tears subsided some.“Alright so I have dug out some popcorn and gathered some movies that the kids might like. I figured t
WARNING This chapter contains physical, emotional, and mental abuse scenes. Some readers can find this work &
Mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausted there are no words that could describe the relief I felt as four police cruisers pulled up to the house. Jax was a strong man, but there was no way that he could take all the officers on. In that moment, I realized that this truly was the end to my living nightmare. I stayed sagging against the car as I watched two police officers go after Jax to calm him down and two officers came over to speak to me.Once the officers got close enough to see my face, they immediately asked me if I needed an ambulance. I told them no, but the other officer insisted on calling the paramedics to check me out. One officer started asking me questions regarding what occurred, while the other one started to write down my answers in a small spiral bound notebook that he pulled from his breast pocket. A few moments into the interview we were interrupted by yelling.I looked over to where the officers had followed Jax and could see that he was st
As we loaded the last of the large furniture into the trucks, I found myself once again thanking everyone there, especially Emily. Thanks to everyone’s generosity I was feeling relieved that we were able to get the large furniture out, and anything of high dollar value that belonged to either myself or the kids. I was relieved that if Jax did get out of jail soon, that anything that we were not able to grab right now could be replaced.The kids were excited as we started moving stuff into our new house. Even though today had started horribly, it was beginning to be a lot better. Since the house was a three bedroom the boys agreed to share the largest room, Olivia opted for the smallest room, which left me with the room closest to the bathroom. I was just happy to be out of that nightmare. Emily had another surprise waiting for me at the house. One of her coworkers was selling a queen size bed, and since Emily knew that I no longer had a bed she had bought it and had it