A Drop In The Ocean

“I wish you and your sister were never born.”“You both ruined my life and I hate you!”I, Olivia Phillips could hear the slurring cold voice of my mother, yelling out to me from the dining room where she was stark drunk with empty beer bottles lying all over the floor of our little three bedroomed cottage house.I was now in the kitchen preparing my lunch box. I could not afford to buy cafeteria food so had to cook my own food at home to carry for school. As for the little cottage we lived in, it was paid through my dead father`s pension money."You are a worthless brat!"Tears were now falling down my face as I heard what my mother was yelling out to me. It was the same thing every morning and even though I was used to it, sometimes the words pierced deeply into my heart.Hearing your own mother yell out that she regretted having you and thought you were a mistake, truly hurt to hear even if the person was drunk.

As soon as I finished my library shift, I took my things which included my book bag and my favorite novel. I wanted to read the last pages of my favorite novel before meeting my ultimate death and erasing myself from existence.I had already now planned my own death. I was going to take pills from my mother’s cabinet and die from overdose. I would breathe my last breath in this horrible lonely world and finally get some rest and peace.When it comes to what happens after death, I actually did not know and hoped I would just be erased from existence.I was actually doing the world a favor as they would no longer have to live with an ugly outcast like me. I could not wait to reach home. Maybe if I died they would all finally miss me. I then thought sadly talking to myself as I always did since I had no one willing to talk to me.After getting out of the library I headed out to the parking spot where the bus shuttle usually came to pick us up to go hom