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20. Good Old Days

I did get a text from my mother soon after I left the church, but I didn’t open it. What good would that do anyway? I already know what it says.

She probably just sent a long winded text about how I embarrassed her and our family. And she, more than likely, is ranting about how my non-wedding put our family in this position in the first place and a whole other manner of unhelpful things that I just don’t want to see.

Opening up her text would just make an already emotionally exhausting day even shittier.

And this week was going so well.

At the risk of jinxing it, I will admit that I had been feeling different lately. I wasn’t just distracting myself. Emma had been basically forcing me to “deal with my shit”, as she’d put it, for the last month.

I can’t say that it was comfortable, it was hard as hell, but I need it. It feels like tearing down a building block sculpture you spent so much time on because some of the pieces came out or don’t fit right anymore. So now it’s time to
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