Betrayal & Pain

*POV DECLAN*

I don't need to open my eyes to know that my gorgeous Emerald is glaring at me. God, that girl is beautiful, always has been. But being away from her for two weeks, the minute my eyes landed on her. I knew why Goliath and I were in pain. We both missed are bullheaded, strong, welled best friend. 

Her long silky black hair that's always perfect. Her tall sexy, confident self, struts around like she knows she deserves the world and she does. That perfectly round ass, if she is my mate, wouldn't mind leaving my mark there. Also, the perfect perky tits a girl could have. Not too big, but big enough to grab on too. She always has a slight tan to her, even during winter. Like she has Italian or something in those genes. 

Those gorgeous full plump lips that I know have to be soft. It took all I had yesterday not to pin her down and kiss her. 

I have always had a massive crush on the girl, and I am in love with her. More by the minute, fall in love with her, and I'm not stupid. I can see Jackson and Wesley have too. However, we don't talk about it or even acknowledge it with one another. But I can't go there. Losing her would utterly kill Goliath and me. 

Plus, with us being mated in a month, goddess! All this can end tragically. But again something we ignore. The vast elephant we should be talking about is being pushed into the broom closet.  

Needing to forget that for the moment, I inhale deeply, wanting her scent to fill me. The perfect blend of vanilla and honey. She always smelt like that, sweet, but no one knows how truly sweet she is. Only a few people get to see all of Emerald. I wish she would show them not just her tough girl exterior. But who am I to demand her? I understand why she is so reserved.

"I know you are up, now get the hell out of bed Dec!" 

Opening one eye, I grin at her, "you really forget I'm your alpha, don't you?"

Her sexy self has her arms crossed, giving me a disapproving look, "nope but don't care. You should be thanking me, worshipping me. You know? For saving you from your throat getting ripped out. Now get up, you need to eat before we go. Not going to have you passing out on me."

As ever, Em is right. If it weren't for her, our dads would have beat us senseless in that room. All three of them were milliseconds from snapping, and we all knew it. But of course, our Princess waltzed into the room, capturing all the attention and saved us. Yet again.

It blows my mind how she has the most vital members of this pack wrapped around her finger, and she never abuses that power. She accepts it. Well, I lied a little. She abuses it for food. That much is true. If she's craving something, all she needs to do is give me one look with those eyes and poke out that bottom lip, and it's hers. 

Using my wolf-like reflexes, I jolt up, grabbing her by the waist and slamming her down into my bed. I get a gratifying giggle out of that maneuver and wrap her in my arms, repeatedly planting kisses on her cheek. 

"Enough trying to sweeten me up! Get your butt out of bed!" Em tries, well, pretends to try to push me away because her strength is extreme. She could if she wanted to, and she has. 

"I'm just worshipping you Princess because you are right. You did save our asses yet again."

Em covers my mouth with her hand before I can kiss her again, and Goliath instantly gets pissed. But I back him off, though he is pacing around, waiting to act his revenge of being denied. 

"I have no idea where that mouth has been that you keep putting on my face."

She says it in a joking manner, but I don't know. Something under there made it seem maybe she's a bit jealous thinking about me screwing around. Mean, don't blame her. I hate even seeing her with girls. Watching her talk to Markus damn near sent Goliath flying across the field to rip his heart out of his chest. 

'Tell her the truth, and we haven't done anything in a month.' Goliath is nudging me with his nose, to be honest. 

I want her to know anyways but will not elaborate on how long or why. Licking her hand, she giggles and moves away, "haven't been with anyone since you left Em. Just been waiting on your ass to come back and to be honest pouting around the damn house since you never called, text, mind linked, nothing with me. Like I was chop liver."

"Stop! You know that's not true. I was training from six in the morning to six at night every day, and by the time I got back to my room and showered was damn near crawling to bed. One night didn't even make it that far. Fell asleep on the bathroom floor."

The girl is a warrior, the damn best I've ever seen. Even over her mom, who was extraordinary, don't get me wrong, she trained Em to be better and more robust, and she didn't fail. The girl is a force to be reckoned with, which terrifies me as much as it turns me on. Something happens to her in war, an attack, anything sends Goliath and me into a spiral.

Picturing her asleep naked on the bathroom floor is appealing, but it also annoys me. Alpha Archie put her through the damn ringer. Apparently, she loved it. Me? Fucking hate how hard he was on her. She's proven herself enough. There was no need for the extra bull. 

The man is up to something when it comes to her, and I don't believe it has much to do with the Dark Jewel Pack. His sole focus is on her. And like I said, I'll be damned if she mates with him. No!

"What is up with you and Goliath?" Em glances over at me with an eyebrow raised.

'Both in love with you! Don't care who your mate is, your mine!' Goliath is ready to rip through me and claim her right here.  

Gem comes forward, making those emerald, green eyes darken a little bit. Then a gold ring starts circling her pupils, making her even more gorgeous. Sometimes, I make Goliath come forward to see her like that. Neither of us is backing down. She wants to know what is going on with me, rightfully so since I've been breathing down her neck since she got home, and I'm not backing down until I know she won't run off with Archie.

"Promise me, Em?"

Gem gives me a warning growl, terrifying to most but to me utterly damn sexy. "Promise you what?"

"Archie. Promise you don't want him. Promise me if he's your mate, you'll reject him."

Gem seizes completely, and Em sits on my bed, then cups my face with her gentle voice, "back of for a minute Goliath, please." 

'Hate that she can do that to me,' Goliath whines, not because she asked him to back down but because of how sad she looks. He never wants to hurt her, and he knows. I know breaking a mate bond will hurt. I shouldn't have asked her to reject him, but it flew out of my mouth. And I mean it, so not taking it back now.

"Can I best honest with?"

"When haven't you been honest with me Em? That's one of the things I love about you how blunt you are."

She gives me a soft smile and drops her hands, "holding things back and lying are two different things. The first I do a lot with you three. To be honest Dec kind of hope whatever the moon goddess beef is with me continues and she just doesn't give me a mate. Like at all." 

'What! What about us? Does she think we aren't good enough? Does she think we won't love her?' 

Goliath is fuming and hurt, but I know it has nothing to do with that. Emerald knows I love her, maybe not in love, but she knows I'd move heaven and mountains for her if asked or needed. 

'Calm down, it's not that.'

I try taming the beast as I cup her face this time and graze her cheek, watching her eyes fall shut. "Don't say that Em, you deserve a mate. One that will love the fucking hell out of you the way you deserve." 

"Doesn't have much to do with that, Dec," when her eyes open, they are full of tears. I've only seen Emerald cry once, and that's when Ruby was killed. That night shattered me not only because I loved Ruby but seeing her daughter break like that. Someone so damn strong, it was unfair. Her whole life is a walking, breathing maze of unfairness. 

"Hey, why are you crying?" Goliath is whimpering, and to be honest, so am I. I don't like her being like this, seeing her hurting. 

"Everything is going to change. We all know it but are too afraid to speak about it. But it's coming Dec and I don't know what's going to happen. Never feared a thing in my life but now? The thought of losing any of you kills me. Of course, I'll respect the mate bond, I understand it and what you need to do but still doesn't make it any less painful." 

There it is, finally, out in the open. I was going to break first, swore on it. I'm not sure Emerald is my mate, but I don't know. Something deep inside me believes she is. I've always thought that Goliath too. Alpha connect with women less than I do with Emerald. They only reject a mate if they believe another woman is more vital to be Luna. It has nothing to do with love. Even if I have a different mate, I plan on rejecting her. Yeah, it will be hell for a minute, but neither Goliath nor I will be connected to that girl. I love Emerald and always have been and will be.

"Let's be clear about something; you are our girl Em. We will never push you away or to the side. You have to know that."

"Not that simple," Em pleads to me with those eyes. I know she's right. She's always right. It takes work. Girls are jealous of her connection to us already. Depending on our mates, they might refuse us being in her life. Though its redundant request won't happen, mainly when she's destined to be the warrior pack leader, we will work hand in hand. But I know Em; she will back off to make them happy, so we don't suffer. She will do it to keep us comfortable no matter the pain it costs her.

Before I can fight her, she backs off my hands and wipes away her tears. Smiling at me, she shakes it off, "it's stupid. Forget it, just get ready so you can eat something before we go. Need to make sure dumb and dumber are up." 

There is pain running through her and Gem right now. It's all in her face, her body language. She can't be thinking I'd up and abandon her, any of us for that matter. We've protected and loved her since we were three. Why the hell would we stop now?

"Em," I hop out the bed, stopping her from opening the door. She looks at me with that fake force smile with which I have a love-hate relationship. Clasping her chin, I kiss her cheek, the other, then her forehead, "I love you, you know that, right?"

"I know, I love you too."

"Good, then trust me when I say this will all work out." 

I can tell by the look in her eyes she wants to believe me but doesn't. Don't blame her because it's almost impossible to guarantee, but I can feel it in my bones. Everything will be okay; it needs to be.

Thirty minutes later, we arrive at the school to clean up our mess while Emerald sits in the grass, leaning back on the palms of her hands, just watching us. I can't help stealing glances at her. The sun is beating down on her already gorgeous skin. It doesn't help she's wearing this skin-tight black dress that's like shirt material but clings to her body and every curve. It's short, too, hitting just above mid-thigh. Her toned sexy legs are stretched out in front of her, crossed over the other so you can't see up, which I'm kind of grateful for, but I wish she'd give me a little peck. 

Her hair is in a ponytail, lightly curled, but it is so long it still hits the middle of her back. 

The girl is too gorgeous for her own good. Her eyes get this intense look when she catches me staring at her, she doesn't say anything, but I can tell something is going through that pretty head of hers. 

Jackson has been stealing looks at her too. When he catches me this time, he mind-links me, 'she was crying in the kitchen before you came down. I don't think she thought we noticed. Know why?'

I glance over at him, and he must have added Wesley, too, since his ears perk up, wanting an answer too. Normally would keep it to myself but what's wrong involves them too. Hell, we all should be talking about this. 

'She's scared.'

Jackson and Wesley drop the pressure washer out of their hands, staring at me in complete shock, ready to call on their wolves to kill someone. 

I point to the pressure washers for them to pick it back up before she comes over her, screaming at them, and start doing the job at hand. 

'She thinks once we get mates everything will change.'

Jackson freezes for a second, 'all I can think about.'

'Me too,' Wesley adds. 

'She told me she hopes the moon goddess still hates her enough not to give her a mate.'

Wesley freaks, 'but what if it's one of us? Does she think we will hurt her?'

'No. Think its more of who we mate with. She-wolves will be jealous of her, they already are, and Em will back off graciously to make them feel better and to easy our lives.'

Jackson snorts, 'if I mate with someone other than her and they think for a second that shit is happening. I'll reject her on the spot. Plus it's a stupid request Warrior Pack Leader is just as important as mine or Wesley's position and we all know that title will go to her.'

'I don't how to prove to her we aren't leaving her.'

Wes looks at me with a sympathetic look, 'you can't. We can't even promise anything because the mate bond is a pull. Even the ones who get mated that hate each other still have a hard time letting go; more often than not, they end up together. She isn't going to believe for a second we will reject our mates for her, she wouldn't want that, nor do we have full control. How do you think Goliath will react to another girl being your mate? Sure he would force you to run off with yours no matter what.'

I never admitted this out loud to anyone because I don't know what it means besides Goliath is in love with her. I know being an alpha means more because no one should have this effect on him or me. 

'Do you notice she's the only person that can make Goliath back down. It's not always me forcing it. Truthfully try to get him to hold his ground but with her he can't. He wants no part of a mate that isn't her.'

They drop the pressure washers in their hands, just gaping at me. I nod for them to pick them up, and they do, wildly fucking slowly. 

"How is that possible?" Jackson tries whispering, but if her wolf hearing is up, she can hear.

"I don't know and before you ask no, I didn't talk to dad about it either."

Jackson snorts, then mind links me, 'maybe you and G are to in your head. Between about to be become Alpha, doing the shit you need to do for that. Worried about losing your friendship with Em think it's just to much. Need to get yourself laid Alpha. That's your problem.'

'Dude, are serious!' Sage snarls at Jackson, and so does Wes, for that matter. 'it doesn't bother you the thought of losing our best friend since we were fucking three? The girl that saved our ass yesterday from being murdered by our dads and a million other times. The girl that bends over backwards making sure your drunk ass not only doesn't get caught but helps clean your filth up from puking your guts out and makes sure you get to bed and the girl in your bed gets home before your mom or dad walk in. Are you really telling me you don't care after you damn near let Aspen out to rage five minutes ago.'

Wes is pissed! I didn't even try stopping him because I thought the same damn thing. How could he suggest getting laid when I told him my wolf was in love with our best friend? It's like he got knocked in the head or something. 

'Chill! Not saying that. Just suggesting we are all about to get mated soon and stressing over it. When in reality we should just be living our lives, having fun while we can and fucking whoever we want until we can't no more.'

'Pray the moon goddess mates you with the biggest gold-digging whore in the United States that does nothing but cheat and use you.' Wes growls at him. Sage had no part in that and doesn't surprise me. He's always been a little more sensitive and aware of Emerald's feelings than we are. We care, we do, but we don't always think before acting.

That ended the conversation and pissed Jacks off a little bit. I think he's feeling guilty because he keeps glancing at Em with an apologetic look. For a second thought, he might be talking to her, but he's not. 

I won't openly admit this to Wes, but I agree. We will all be tied down soon, hopefully, and maybe fucking a she-wolf stupid is just what I need. There is no need to focus on this before we know what the moon goddess decides. I will be polite about it and not let Em see I'm fucking around.

Mind-linking Jacks only, 'club tonight?'

'Take it you aren’t inviting these two?' Jackson raises a brow at me, and even though we both feel guilty, we still decide to go anyway. 

Jacks and I are drunk, like really drunk. It's one in the morning. Thankful as shit Dad let me off the hook tonight. Only because he's going to be out of town for a week, and I'll be stepping in while he's gone. Something happened back at our pack in one of the towns, but we are four cities over still in our neck of the woods, but that is not my problem.

Right now, my focus is this cute blonde dancing on me while her cousin is all over Jacks. My goal is a girl that does not look anything like Em. Consider that checked off. Small petite five-foot one blonde girl with an okay ass, barely any tits, and pale dual blue eyes. This little she-wolf wasted her beauty on partying. Now she’s hardly even cute but she's a hole I need to feel to empty my fucking mind. 

'If you need to do this bullshit, double wrap it! Don't need this thing carrying an alpha baby.'

Good ol' Goliath coming to knock out my phone. I don't allow him to, though; I sneer at him, reminding him I'm always smart. And that's the truth. Double condom my shit every time. Fuck out of here with that bull. 

"Want to go back to my place babe?" Flashing my toothy grin. She melts like butter, and we head back to the packhouse. Where everyone should be knocked cold, and Em won't be there.

We pull up to the packhouse about twenty minutes later, Jacks tosses a couple hundreds at the cab driver, but his mind isn't anywhere but fucking the girl he's clawing all over. 

I pick up my girl, wrapping her legs around me, and start going at her mouth. She tastes of nothing but alcohol and drama. But whatever, as I said, doesn't mean shit with her. Trying to be as quiet as humanly possible, I make my way up to my room once the door shuts. I put the girl down and demand her, "get naked and go lay down."

"The girl you and your boys run around with, she cool with you doing this?" This girl doesn't care. She thinks it's hot. And I don’t want to talk about Em because I'll kick her to the curb.

"Now baby are you worried about her?"

"A little," she fake pouts, and it's God awful, but I know how to play the game. 

"Don...

'Do not finish that sentence!' 

"Don't worry about her, she's no one! Just a warrior of my future pack, that's it. Have to be around her, she works for my dad and soon me."

*POV EMERALD*

A rogue attack happened tonight, so doing what I did and was called on went into the woods after them. It was ten against one, but they got them all down. I got a good beating out of it, a nice open slash on my head, leg, and bruises galore. I'm sore as shit.

The funny thing was everyone tried reaching Jacks and Declan, but they have yet to answer or show up. Wes is livid that he still can't get ahold of either of them, and it's around one in the morning. 

He made me come back to the packhouse with him to watch over me since I also had a concussion and was supposed to be on bed rest for two weeks. Dad, Alpha Dean, or anyone thought I would do it if I stayed at our house, and they are right. 

"I'm sorry Em, if they knew you were hurt, they'd come running. You know that?" 

Gem rolls her eyes, and I hold mine back. I am not going to take my anger out on him. It's not his fault he's done nothing but help me the entire time, comfort me, "don't sweat it. We...."

A bunch of banging comes from people walking up the stairs then I hear Declan's door shut. Wes is fuming, so when he opens his door to tell him what happened, my stomach starts to turn.

I heard Declan's little fuck buddy ask about me, and then he did something I never thought manageable, "Don't worry about her; she's no one! Just a warrior of my future pack, that's it. Have to be around her. She works for my dad and soon me."

Even though Wes tried warning him, Dec was too drunk to register it or didn't care. Going for the second because that's the way my life worked. I was used to getting shitted on, betrayed, or anything trauma related, even a tiny bit. But Declan? Telling someone, I was nothing to him? Just some damn employee or some shit?

That does me in, and I'm done being here. I get off the bed, very awfully, may I add. My body is a complete mess since Gem lost her adrenaline, and I shifted too quickly. She had no time to heal me and still hasn't since she's sleeping off all that happened. Regardless I'm getting the hell out of this house.

Wes grabs me by the waist, "don't. Your hurt Em. He didn't mean that shit, he's drunk, he's just tr....."

"To get laid! Yeah, I heard! But for him to say I'm, nothing is a fucking low ass blow! I'm not staying here Wes, I.....I...." For the first time since my mother died, I'm crying. No correction: I am in a full-blown sob, bawling my eyes. 

"Breathe Emmy, please breathe it’s okay."

"He should have been there! They both should have! I look a fucking mess for protecting this pack! HIS FUCKING PACK! Even if I don't mean shit to him as my damn Alpha, he should of been there!" 

I'm screaming at this point, praying he hears me. This whole fucking house hears me. I don't give a fuck anymore because it's officially fuck Alpha Declan and fuck Beta Jackson. They both can go fuck themselves straight up the ass. 

"Shit! Come on Em you have to calm down you just busted open the stitches on your stomach." 

Wes picks me up off the floor, and I wrap my arms around his neck, crying into his chest when the door opens to his room. It's one of them. I know it without even looking. Sage is vibrating Wes's body, trying to come out, but between them, I'm not sure who wants to kill them more.

"Em! What the fuck, ha...."

"Do not touch her!" Wes growls at Declan and jerks me away. 

Goliath roars, not growls roars, at Sage and Wes, but Wes is brave, holding his ground. "She heard you asshole, every fucking word. I tried stopping you but nope you rather stick your dick in some useless she wolf and put Em down in the process. Oh, and by the way Alpha Declan there was a rogue attack around 9 last night. Em was pinned down ten to one, she took them all and got hurt pretty fucking bad. Which right now I need to take her back to the hospital to get stitched up because she just busted open a few crying over you. Now I don't give a shit if you are my Alpha right now, you can do whatever you want to me after I take her to the hospital and back home. And I swear to fucking God Dec she's supposed to be on bedrest for two weeks and now she refuses to stay here. So, if she so much as moves out of her bed I don't care if I die I'll come for you. God! What the fuck is wrong with you!" 

I don't more, continue crying into his chest with my eyes squeezed shut, not wanting to look at him because he makes me cave. I refuse to fucking cave. 

"Em?" Declan's voice cracks, and it's killing me. But I stand my ground. 

"Emmy? Please look at me. Please!" I never thought I'd heard Declan cry, but he is. I can hear the crack in his voice. I feel bad, but parts of me feel so damn good. 

"What's go...fuck! What the hell?" Jackson shouts. 

Wes finally moves, "talk to your Alpha how big of piece of shit you both are. I'll resign I don't give a shit because at this moment don't think neither of you deserve her or your fucking titles."

"Emmy! PLEASE! I'm sorry, baby! So, fucking sorry!" Declan is full fledge crying and, like me, can feel Wes starting to feel bad for him because Alpha’s don’t cry. It's rare, and if they do, it usually only happens in front of their Luna. That's it. In their minds, it makes them feel weak.

I mind link with Wes, 'please tell him no. I can smell her on him. I can smell her in this house. Tell him to go back to her and leave me alone.'

'He's really crying Em. Goliath is hurting I don't think he wanted any part of what he said or was doing with that girl. That has to account for something.'

"Can someone tell me what is going on? And why the hell Em has bruises and shit all of her? Why didn'...."

"Swear to God if you say why someone didn't call you! I've been, we all have including your dad D trying to mind link you and call your phones since nine! Fucking nine! So please Jacks please don't act like the damn victim in this!" Wes is giving it to these two. I'm impressed, and honestly, with how mad Dean was for them not answering, Wes will walk away scotch free for talking to his Alpha and Beta this way. 

"Now if you two would fucking move! I already told your Alpha she's bleeding out again and needs restitching. She might not mean anything to you Alpha Declan, but she means a lot to me and your family!"

I'm not sure if they moved or what happened, but Wes got us out of that room and downstairs to the kitchen. He lays me on the counter, and we notice how badly I'm bleeding. There is no hospital it’s to bad, need someone to stitch me up now before losing more blood.

Wes shouts, and I mean, this house is gigantic. Fitting three families comfortably and still has a shit ton more bedrooms. But his shout echoes through the whole place, vibrating everything for Beta Anthony.

The next thing I know, I start feeling light head but heavy. My body feels like something is sitting on top of it, trying to squash me. I smack around, looking for Wesley's arm. When I finally latch on, I dig my nails into his forearm, unable to breathe. 

Gasping for air, I'm just staring at his face, watching the tears fall off his pretty face, "come on emmy, breathe!" 

Does he know that I'm trying? My wolf is gone, two of my best friends are gone, and with these three, it's only a matter of time before Wes is gone too. Declan will order him to stay away from me or some shit since he hates me now. For what I'll never know. We were fine before he and Jacks went out; I thought we were anyway, but I guessed I was just another girl along for the ride. Just this time, I got straight-up humiliated. And this is even more so. I'm not weak.

I'm letting a man break me down!

Beta Anthony moves so I can see him, "this is going to hurt but you need to stay still okay?"

I nod aggressively since I still can't breathe. I close my eyes to focus on my breathing instead of the pain of a needle threading in and out of me. Suddenly familiar hands wrap around my face, and I know those damn hands. I want to go running, kicking, screaming for the hills, but I can't unless I want a prominent scar. 

Opening my eyes, in my face, there is a teary-eyed, snot nose Declan. I don't even feel bad for him now. I glare into his soul. I would love for Gem to wake up to attack him. 

'Please baby! I'm sorry, okay? I'll do anything to make it up to you but stay.'

He has got to be joking. Where are the cameras, seriously? 

'No,' I answer flatly with no emotion.

'She didn't mean anything. I said that to her just to shut her up, I shouldn't have and I'm sorry. Please baby! I love you; you know that now stay! Tell me what happened while I hold you.'

Love me? This dude has got to be kidding me! He's doing the same thing to me that he just did to her. 

'Look at that, me and your fuck buddy do have something in come, we both mean nothing to you.'

Declan looks taken aback by what I said, and Goliath is not happy with him at the moment. That's odd and catches my attention instantly. Now I know Goliath is fond of Gem and me, but he shouldn't be this upset over Declan dismissing me. 

Upset, sure, but I know Goliath. He is trying everything to rip through Dec right now. To see me, to make sure I'm okay. Wes was right. Goliath is hurting. Hurting? But why?

There's no way? No, I can't be his mate, can I? God, I wish Gem would wake up and help me read Goliath's mind. Maybe he knows if we are mates. Better question, does Declan know? Or even have a slight idea that it was a possibility we could be? 

That twist a knife in my stomach. If he knows or even thinks we are mates, why would he even be screwing someone or saying something like that! Mates are supposed to be their lovers and their worlds and worship the ground each other walk on. Everything Declan swore I deserved.

He was all over me yesterday, fuck even when I woke him up. Kissing me, telling me he loved me. He was ensuring me that nothing would happen to us. But here he is before we know if the moon goddess made my dreams come true, betraying me. 

Swear no one can tell me that woman doesn't hate me! Who gives someone a mate they love, would do anything for and makes her think he feels the same, then turns around ripping her heart out? 

'You mean everything to me Em please I will prove it to you.'

"Princess! Are you okay?" Alpha Dean comes running in all wide-eyed. Next to him is his beautiful Luna. Everything I could have been should have been. A Luna who is also on her way to being the best warrior anyone has ever seen. Now that is a role, I would have been excellent at, and I would have loved my Alpha with every single drop in me like I have for almost fifteen years now. 

'Baby, please!' Declan brings my attention back to him. Not only is he crying externally. The sobs internally are worse than what he's showing. Hate that he's hurt, but he did this to himself.

Now I need to get out of here for a while. Out of this pack, focus on anything but this until I'm ready to deal with him. Decide what to do.

Closing my eyes, I only have one option and pray for the blood work returns, proving I'm an Eros. 

"Pops, did you get the bloodwork back?"

Dean rubs my arm, "that doesn't matter right now, what happened?"

I open my eyes, letting all my emotions show in them, "please just tell me."

He looks over at his son, knowing he fucked up somehow, and his wolf flashes in his eyes for half a second before grinding his teeth, bringing his focus back to me.

"Em you are a decedent of Ezekiel Eros. You are his great-granddaughter that would have made your mother his granddaughter, and there's more." 

The look on my face says it all. It can never be so simple. Biting down on my tongue, hissing in pain as Anthony ties up his stitch, "what else?"

"Officially you are an Alpha but not only are you the Alpha of the Dark Moon Pack, you Emerald are also their reigning Beta. Your biological father had an older brother who the title went to first but your grandfathers both believed he would be a good warrior. Well he by passed good and became an elite warrior by eighteen, took over the warrior pack. So that makes you an extremely rare bread, an Alpha, Beta and a warrior. An elite warrior I'm sure by time you turn eighteen. Dark Moon Pack is yours for the taking i...if you want it."

Dean's voice cracked at the end. I know he doesn't want me to leave Silver Moon Pack. No one in this room does. The silence is deafening. There are about eleven wolves in here. It's never quiet with that many of us. Lifting my hand shakily, I hold it toward Alpha Dean. He squeezes it tightly like he knows I'm running, but he's wrong. 

I'm running for now, but I need to do something I need space to think without being suffocated by Dec or Jacks. 

"I'll never abandon Silver Pack; this is my home but do need your permission to leave for a little bit Alpha? It's important and I also need you to call Alpha Archie."

'No! You are not going anywhere with him, Em!' Dec growls through our mind-link. I won't spare him a glance because one look and I know I'll change my mind."

'If you want me to speak to you again, you will let me do what I need to do.'

Dean eyes me for a minute, wondering what I'm up to. After a minute, he kisses my hand, sighing, "Alpha Archie is due here in a few hours. I had to call him about the attack since he wanted you to do the class next week. When he heard what happened he wanted to come check on you himself."

Goliath snarls and growls like a madman catching everyone's attention. I know more of that was towards Declan than me. Finally, I look up at him, who is seconds away from letting Goliath fully come out. I reach up, grazing Declan's cheek, but this is for Goliath, not him. 

"I'm not upset with you Goliath. You didn't do anything wrong. Just need to get away for a little bit. Silver Pack is my home and I'll never abandon my pack."

He whimpers but retreats like the sweet wolf he can be. I love Goliath and will miss him, but this is for the best. For now. 

"I don't want to let you go Emmy, but I deserve this. Just please know I didn't mean a thing I said, you mean the complete damn opposite to me. You are everything Em, everything any man or wolf would kill to be with. I love you and please just come back to me. Please!" 

The pain in his voice is cracking my heart right down the middle, and the tears running down his face are gut-turning, but we both need space. To figure out what's next, if we even have a future as friends, let alone together. I would like to know if we are mates but not ready to find that out just yet. To hurt and mad, I don't want to make a regretful decision.

"Focus on becoming a great Alpha Dec. Show him you are better than he even believes you can be, it's in there. Time to grow up, doesn't mean no more fun, just not all about that anymore. I'm going to focus on Dark Jewel making sure they have a good alpha. They deserve one after all these years. Like I said, I'll be back."

He nods slowly, caressing my cheek, not going to stop him because not sure how long I'll be gone. I will miss his little random touches and hugs that I know without a shadow of a doubt. 

"I have no right to ask you this but this morning I asked you to promise me something, we didn't get to finish that talk but can you promise me?"

There are zero things in me attracted to Alpha Archie. Yeah, the man is a Greek god. He is built to perfection, and though he doesn't show it, I know there is a softer side to the guy that no one sees. That's why I want to spend time with him to break down the barrier he built and why. If he wants Dark Jewel, he will need to show me more than his Alpha power. Because, well, now I have the right to throw it back. 

But no part of me wants him, and I don't see that changing anytime soon. So sure, can give him that.

"Promise Declan."

Wesley moves to the other side of me, "just stay, Alpha Archie will be here soon anyways. You can shower and catch at least a little sleep before he does."

I have no fight in me left, and he's right. There is no point in me going home now with it almost morning. Sleeping is something won’t be happening but a shower. That much I could use. 

Luna Esma clasps my hand, "come on, sweet girl, can use my shower. Think you need a minute away from all the male testosterones."

"Hey!" Alpha Dean playfully taps her arm.

"Just stating facts handsome Alpha of mine. Plus now that she knows without a doubt she's an Alpha sure she will have no issue challenging you two more than she already does. Especially our son at the moment."

I have always treasured and enjoyed watching Esma and Dean's relationship. They aren't just Alpha and Luna. There is genuine full-on love there. As there should be since they fell in love at sixteen, the moon goddess mated them by some miracle. Besides mom and Carter, this is the relationship I would secretly pray for. I want someone to love me the way Alpha Dean loves Luna Esma. The way Carter loved my mom, and I'm sure the way my dad loved my mom.

Esma leads me the way to her bedroom, then to her bathroom. When she said I could shower in here got a little giddy. She has a vast, and I mean massive, walk-in shower with eight water heads. 

As the water sprayed all over my body, messaging the sore areas and rinsing off the blood, I let my mind go with thoughts about the past two days. Declan had been all over me since I returned, showering me with attention. More than normal. Checking me out, I caught him on many occasions—his random kisses. 

But something hit me when he was begging me to forgive him. He kept calling me baby. When he said he loved me, he didn't mean it as friends. I could see it in his eyes. Declan and Goliath are somehow in love with me. In ways that make me over the moon but in others, what will happen on our birthday if our mate is not one another?

Would he reject his might for me? I promised him to reject Archie if he was mine. I don't want to talk to him, but it's only fair to know if he would do the same for me.

'Would you do the same for me?'

He was quiet for a moment, but I knew he was there, and he heard me. I'm about five seconds away from closing the mind link and blocking it for the foreseeable future when he finally comes back through.

'Wasn't ignoring you, Dad was yelling at me. But Em if by some off chance you aren't my mate yes I'd reject them. In a heartbeat. Promise baby. I will remind you every day that I love you and how truly sorry I am. I don't know how but even when your gone I'll make sure you remember those two things. Daily.'

I want to believe him, but part of me can't. If he wants to prove it, more power to him. We will see if he genuinely means it and keeps his word. 

As I'm out of the shower, I see Esma put a pair of black leggings and a plain beige crewneck on the counter. The woman is a fashion icon out of the house. Inside she dresses almost like a lazy college student but is still utterly beautiful. Leggings, oversized sweatshirts, or just a little cropped shirt. The woman doesn't look a day over twenty, so she pulls it off, but it is a little funny to think me and Luna Esma have the same sweatshirt and leggings. 

'I love your laugh but curious what is making you giggle?'

I didn't realize I left the mind link open, but I answered him anyways. 'Your mom and I have the same sweatshirt. Found it a little funny for some reason. Probably because of how tired I am.'

'That's because she dresses like a teenager, drives me nuts. All the guys flirting with her Jesus!'

'Get over it Dec, you got a hot mom. It happens. Girls flirt with my dad all the time right there in front of me.'

He goes quiet but can hear him and Goliath thinking, maybe speaking to one another. It's quiet for another minute or two before he finally comes back through, 'Em?'

'Yeah?'

'I love you.'

'I love you Dec, that's why this hurts so damn bad. Told you my fear of losing you, losing the guys and the...'

'I know. I know I screwed up, big time. Told you I would fix this, though and I will. Just baby please come home to me. When you are ready come running straight to me promise to catch you.'

'That's what I want to do but need to know that without a shadow of a doubt you'll actually be there to do just that.'

'Willing to put in the work and already starting. You'll see.'

I had yet to learn what he was talking about, but I sure will find out what it was soon enough. One thing about Dec, if he put his mind to it and wanted something, he was doing everything the sun until he got it.

Esma is sitting on the edge of her bed as I walk out of the bathroom and smile brightly in my direction, "Alpha, Beta and warrior. Ruby would be proud of how far you came and will go sweet girl." 

"Wherever that is," I groan like a typical teenage girl. Esma giggles and guides me to the chair of her vanity. She's brushing out my hair, watching me through the mirror. 

"What did Declan do? Besides bring a she-wolf in here."

I'm not telling her that, no damn way. "It's not that he was doing anything with her, I know they don't mean anything to me and made myself numb to that feeling a long time ago. Something he said to her when she asked about me."

Esma lets out an exaggerated breath, "not often but sometimes my son can be extremely stupid."

"Don't worry about it momma, it’s me and Dec sure we will move past it. For now, getting away for a week or two is what's best." 

"I agree, just hate to see you go so soon. You just got home from being gone two weeks and that killed Declan. He was nothing but pure alpha growling, snapping at everyone. If it wasn't that he was all cuddly with me talking about you. Now you are leaving because of something he did, so I know it’s going to kill him more."

He said he was pouty but didn't know it was true, or he didn't tell me the whole truth. Declan seemed to be way worse than pouty. I wouldn't say I like thinking of him running around heartbroken, but he has plenty to focus on, becoming a significant alpha and getting me back, like he says he wants.

That's exactly what I tell Esma, and she agrees. But she loves me, of course, and loves her son, and she's hurting for the both of us. I can understand and sympathize with that. But still I refuse to sway my decision over that knowledge. 

I am checking the time and am surprised to see it's almost four. I didn't realize how much time had gone by. There is no point in sleeping now because, depending on the phone call and how long it took Alpha Archie to leave, he should be here within the hour, maybe two max. I should eat something since I haven't eaten since lunch yesterday. 

Esma must be reading my mind, "let's go back downstairs, I can tell you aren't going to be sleeping. I will make breakfast for everyone."

Not up for everyone but not my house, so whatever. Following my Luna, as I was told, we go back downstairs. The only ones down here are Wes, Jacks, and Dec, who watch my every move. 

Jackson hasn't said a word to me, not even one, and I'll be damn if it's me first. He's wrong in this situation, not me. 

As I go to sit down on one of the barstools, I hiss in pain because a few of my ribs broke, and without Gem, those have to heal on their own until she decides she had enough rest. It hurts, though, bad! So bad I almost fall over until familiar hands clasp me by my waist. 

Before I can snap at him for touching me, he gently helps me onto the stool and drops his hands immediately. 

"I'm sorry but I wasn't going to allow you to fall."

Taking a deep calming breath, remembering that it was a sweet, genuine gesture, not him just touching me of his own free will. I get enough strength to smile at him, nothing big but a little one, "thank you."

"You're welcome," he goes to graze my cheek but drops his hand. Those blue eyes burn into me, wanting me to cave, and he's trying until he stops himself completely. He turns towards his mom, who is pulling things out of the fridge and cabinets to make breakfast, "need some help mom? Genuinely asking, not trying to get out of my lecture I know is coming."

Esma smirks at him, "in that case, sure sweety. I would love your help."