Alexa's POV I had called Sasha before leaving school but she hadn't picked up, and so i had decided to head back home knowing i could always call her or go to her apartment later on. I probably looked downcast as i sat in the living room staring blankly at the tv screen cause Mildred walked up to me looking slightly worried. "Is there a problem, Mildred?". I asked her. And she shook her head. "I was going to ask you the exact same thing". She said to me. "You look rather sad". Lately it was unusual to see me was, i was always happy or at ease since i was mostly with Calan. I wasn't worried about anything except my friends and my exams. I blew out a breath. "I'm fine". I told her. "I just have a thing or two on my mind". She offered me a warm smile. "That's understandable dear". She said to me. "But do talk to someone if something worries you, it's never good to keep it in". I nodded. "Thank you so much". I said to her. She smiled once more before turning around and walking a
Yet another scream rippled through my throat as I felt the yet another unimaginable pain, I felt as though I would lose my mind if it didn’t stop, I felt as though my life would drain from me slowly but surely. “Just a little bit more, Alexa. Push”. The voices were suddenly unclear and distant; like voices talking in an empty glass room, the bass and echoes, it all sounded so far. Was I fading out? Was I drifting off? Would this be how I die? “I think she’s slipping. Do something!”. “Alexa? Alexa can you hear me? Think about your baby, she’s almost out”. My baby….. “Push Alexa”. My baby, my dear, dear child. The thought of her suddenly had a bolt of energy surging through my veins, and with my borrowed strength I pushed once more, pushed till I felt a sudden emptiness, till I heard the soft cries of a baby, the cries I’ve so desperately wanted to hear for a long, long time. “She’s out! She’s out!”. And that was it, I drifted off. ~~ Beep….beep….beep…. I woke up
Sandalwood…. It smelt of sandalwood in his arms, and as soothing as it was, the nausea I felt was way too much to be subdued, I clamped my palm against my mouth as I let myself crumble completely. He said nothing as he gently guided me to the floor; the cold and hard floor. “Calm yourself”. He said to me. His voice, it still sounded as deep and distant as ever, as bewitching but cold as it always did, now I felt not just my stomach but my heart clench as well, and now I couldn’t keep my tears from falling as he guided my head to lean against his chest. My shoulders shook as the sobs choked me over and over again. “She can’t be gone”. I cried quietly. “She’s gone, I’m sorry”. He said. I shook my head. It was easy for him to just accept that she was gone; it was easy for him to just say it as though it were nothing. I pried my face from his chest so I could look up at him, so I could look up to see those chilling grey eyes staring down at me. “How easy it is for you to say
Lightheaded…. I felt extremely lightheaded, so lightheaded that I had to lean my head against the headboard to keep myself from fading out, all the while my breaths faltered and my heart pounded heavily against my chest. I could help but think; why was I even alive? first I was forced to marry a cold and extremely heartless billionaire whom I was somewhat attracted to, and then I find myself sinfully attracted to his best friend who was a married man, and then I lose my child, the only thing that had kept me going for the past nine months, it was all too much. Calan Grant, my supposed husband stood by the bedside staring down at me with a look I couldn’t quite fathom. And seeing him had those painful memories rushing through my mind once more. *9 months ago….. * It was a cold night, and I could hear the howling sounds of the winds as they blew intensely, something about them seemed…carefree, unhinged; unstopped and unhindered. And I found myself wishing I could just disint
Now, it wasn’t the memories of that night that hurt me so much, rather, it was the fact that I had woken up the next morning to find myself alone in my bed, I had pulled myself together and had immersed myself in a tub of warm water to soothe my spent and sore body. I had woken up with a bad feeling gnawing at my nerves, somehow I knew that I had made the greatest mistake of my life by letting this happen, I knew that I could no longer force aside my attraction for him, I knew that I had fallen completely and absolutely. I didn’t see him for the rest of the day, and when I did see him the next day he had attempted to walk past me as though nothing had happened at all. *flashback* “Wait”. I said. He didn’t stop this time, he just kept on walking as though I hadn’t spoken at all, as though I wasn’t even there. I felt my heart constrict painfully and it didn’t take much for my tears to break free. “Wait, please”. I said again, my voice had never sounded more broken. He turned aro
I was getting hysteric now and I almost couldn’t catch my breath. I sat there crying my heart and soul out as I tried to figure out where I would go from here, as I tried to pull my thoughts together, as I tried to convince myself that I wasn’t losing my mind. “Why? Why didn’t you come?”. I cried breathlessly. “Why didn’t you come! I needed you, I needed you…”. He lowered himself beside me on the bed, all the while his hand remained on my shoulder securely. “Calm yourself, Alexa, breathe”. He said to me. I shook my head. I couldn’t, I felt suffocated. “You knew, you were told, why didn’t you come?”. I cried. I could never understand him, I could never understand anything. Saying nothing more, he pulled me against his chest for a hug but I continued to cry and struggle against him. I hated that my body still responded to his touch, I hated that it still felt sated in his embrace. “Leave me, don’t touch me”. I cried breathlessly. “Don’t touch me”. He didn’t let go, and
“Will she be alright?”. “Yes. However, I’ll advice that she gets all the emotional support she can get, she’ll need it to truly get better……” I blinked a couple of times as I tried to clear the drug-induced fogginess from my mind. I could hear voices again, and like the previous times, it sounded as though people were speaking from behind a glass wall, it sounded distant and faint; with the subtlest of echoes. I couldn’t quite tell who exactly it was that was speaking to the nurse or doctor; I couldn’t tell if it was Micheal or….Calan. I doubted the latter though, Calan didn’t care enough, he never did and he never would. A heavy breath left me, one which carried sorrows and grief, however, I didn’t feel lighter, far from that, I wasn’t sure I’d feel lighter or better anytime soon. Earlier, I had returned to bed with the help of Micheal, and for a moment I had just lay still, staring up at the ceiling with glassy eyes, and then he had said: “Good to see that you’re awake”. *F
I shook my head unenergetically.“Why did you leave?”. I asked after a long moment of silence. “Why didn’t you come back when…”.I felt my heart clench all over again and I began to sob quietly. It took a moment before he responded, and for a moment I had thought he wouldn’t say anything. “I thought you were better off without me”. He said at last. “I knew you were better before you met me, happier. It was….stupid of me”. He reached out slowly and placed his hand on my shoulder, and though all I wanted to do was shrug it off, I couldn’t, a part of me….didn’t want to. I didn’t look at him as I continued to sob quietly. “I am truly sorry”. He said. “I’m sorry she’s gone, I’m sorry you didn’t get to meet her, I’m sorry things had to turn out this way”. Perhaps I would have believed him if he didn’t sound like the cold and distant bastard he’s always been. And the fact that he was talking about her had me sobbing even “Don’t….talk about her”. I cried breathlessly. “Don’t talk about