All Chapters of Colors of Heartbreak : Chapter 21 - Chapter 30
56 Chapters
XX. Letter
Feelings. The feelings of kindness and compassion were outrageous especially when I want to strangle someone with the name of Arya Petrov. I’m not a violent person. I swear. I survived eighteen years in a house with two adults trying to shape me into someone I am not. I didn’t throw things. I didn’t stomp my feet. I didn’t let their lecture and disappointment stopped me from being me. I thought I grew numb when it comes to them.And then Brad happened.Hitting rock bottom is never easy even if I have my friends with me. But for my family, expecting me to just bounce back unscratched is ludicrous and downright impossible.Now, who’s the disappointment?Am I? Or them calling me at three in the morning to say sorry for not making it to ‘my wedding’? Lovely, huh?I told them everything. Well, not everything, I purposely omitted the part where I married a different man a week before ‘Brad and I's wedding’. And
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XXI. Your Place or Mine?
Should I tell her?Nah, she's too much of a gossip to be trusted with such details. I gawked at her in mocked surprise, “I bet.” I said dryly. “And by the way, I think you're dreaming on the other ninety-nine times you claimed you called. You called once, R! And the only reason I hadn't picked it up because you just let it rang once before turning off your phone. Once R! Not a hundred times.”She didn't even look embarrassed. “True. But that’s because I realized that I might be disturbing you two on your—” she said wiggling her brows.  She did. But I didn't voice that out, afraid that they'll see right through me. Afraid that they'll see how Killiad's mere presence is affecting me in ways no one did, even Brad.Last night, I completely drifted off on Killiad's shoulder and then my phone rang, waking me up. After attempting to call back my friend I asked Killiad if he could dri
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XXII. Proposal
“Do I have to choose?”“What about this. I just bought a property on the Cliffside. Why don't we head over there? The weather is good and at the same time I could ask you what you think about the cabin.”“A cabin?”“A rundown cabin. It goes with the property when I bought it. I thought of doing the repair myself.”“Cliffside? That's near the woods, right?”“It's within the woods just like the one where I brought you last night.”“Why? Can we just eat right here? Or the park?” at least I won't be alone with Killiad again. Being with him makes me lower my guard down, and being vulnerable is the last thing in my mind a couple of weeks after I caught my ex-fiance doing another woman.“I have something to tell you in private and in case you decided to throw things or shout at my face then you can do so without the neighbors' knowledge.” He said, winking at me.It's probably about our marriage and his choice to stay with it for whatever reas
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XXIII. Cabin
“Did you just change the car?” I asked the moment I stepped out of the building. A few of the passersby had stopped and gawked at the sleek and beautiful Lambo Killiad had changed to the car he usually drives.“Do you like it?” His eyes were fixed on my face the whole time he rounded the car to get my small bag and opening the door for me.Jaw-slacked, I stared at the interior in awe and amazement before I met his twinkling gray eyes. “Yes, but I don't really mind the other one.”He shrugged his shoulder like it was not a big deal. “I want to impress you.” I stared at him, expecting to see arrogance and smugness seeping out but all I saw was his serious and expectant look.I want to yell at him but at the same time, I was touched by his effort. Nobody wanted or had made an effort to impress me before. It was me who always chase someone for approval be it my clients, or my parents, or Brad, they are all the s
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XXIV. Moments
His hard gaze promptly softens when he saw the terrified expression on my face.Killiad cleared his throat, gazing at me mournfully. “I'm sorry, my University days were not as fun as everyone else.”I gulped nodding my head not saying anything.“Wife,” I stole a glance at him before looking away again. I don't want to say anything that could trigger a fight that I couldn't win.‘But Killiad is not Brad, Elle. Stop comparing two different people.’ a voice in my head chided.Triggers. Words or actions that sometimes could change our mood drastically. It's part of the trauma caused by accidents or situations we don't what to go back to.Maybe Killiad was no different than me. Perhaps he's battling his own demons in silence.My terror was triggered by Killiad’s abrupt change in demeanor. While Killiad’s changed in demeanor change when I asked about his University.“Yes,” I
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XXV. Your Place or Mine?
On some days working in the office was gloomy and dull, save for the occasional chatter outside my office.Today's a different story though. I am the cause of the chatter, thanks to my ever-supportive best friend for selling me out to my employees.“So, I heard from a reliable birdie that you've married a ‘hottie’ without everyone knowing.” Emily, my secretary said as a way of greeting as she barged inside my office without knocking.I gritted my teeth in annoyance.‘Arya, one of these days I’m going to skin you alive.’ I thought darkly, gripping the pen poised to sign on a document.I threw her a glance before getting back to work. Or pretending I am. “Yeah, a drunk marriage I can’t seem to get rid of,” I said feigning nonchalance.She scoffed before settling herself on the chair in front of me, staring at me like I've committed a heinous crime. “Probably because you li
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XXVI. Catch You
In a world dominated by men, women get easily trampled and overlooked. Most women didn’t even realize that they were already dominated by the opposite sex.I hate it.I hate the fact that most women were easily blinded by the words so sweet they didn’t even realize it’s a leash put on their neck.That was what my parents did to me back then.So I distanced myself from them. Yes, I love them but it will never be enough to stop me from reaching my dreams and making my goals a reality. That’s why despite the love I felt for Brad I didn’t let him dictate me like my parents did to me back then. I won’t let them make me someone I’m not.And now Killiad.I don’t know what to make of him. Sometimes he’s everything I am searching for but other times he’s someone I've been running from.I angrily touched the call button below his name, my foot impatiently tapping the floor.He p
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XXVII. Free Falling
 Happiness. Sometimes it doesn’t occur to us that we’ve been living without it until one day somebody will come into our lives and made us realize that we’ve been missing it without even knowing. Then, we'll start to try to remember when was the last time we laugh so hard or when we just unconsciously smile because though life is hard and simple someone is making it more special.Killiad made me realize all that.I felt guilty. Everyone deserves to be happy and I know I don’t have to feel guilty about it. Brad made his choice. I know I should have moved on and forgotten Brad but the thing is I can’t. I simply can’t.Killiad made sure of it.Once while on our nighty stroll he suddenly asked me about Brad and my high from the night we shared abruptly crashed back to the ground. I got mad and walked out on him. He chased me. Hold me firmly and said “Stop running from the things and memories that are hurt
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XXVIII. Moving On
I didn’t stay over at Killiad’s place since we’re going to spend the following day together. So instead of going to work the next day I just called Emily to come over to my place to finalize some things.Emily didn’t bother to ask me why I was at home working the moment her eyes fell on the boxes cluttered on the floor. I was itching to tell her that I’m moving out but that was just plain obvious since I didn’t bother to unpack everything that was already in the box a week ago. I wanted to tell her that I’m moving in with Killiad but I’m too afraid to see judgment in her eyes. But then it’s better if she heard it from me rather from the other human being that would 'surely’ exaggerate the whole thing into something as huge as winning the lotto or something. And yes, I’m talking about Arya.She was gathering the documents on the coffee table when I hesitantly told her about my plan on moving in with Killi
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XXIX. Starting Again
 I don’t know Emily, not personally so I don’t have the right to judge her. She has her own story, I know that. And based on the scars I saw on her back it probably has to do with the emotional, psychological, and physical trauma she’d experienced.I let out a tired sigh as I stared blankly ahead.“Hey, just let it go. I’m sure she had her reasons.” Killiad said as he walked around the kitchen counter before sitting beside me on the stools, facing the kitchen.“I know but I can’t help it. Two times she said she doesn’t want to see me hurt again, kind of ominous, you know.” I said exasperatedly.He leaned his elbows on the counter, his fingers steeple while his chin resting the back of his palm. “Don’t worry, I’m sure she’ll tell you when she’s ready.”“I hope so,” I answered, finally facing Killiad.“Hey, chin up the
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