Ten Years Ago - Age EighteenLess than a month into the first semester of college and it was possible I might have to drop out. I watched the leaves just beginning to change from my bedroom window. A beautiful death in yellow and orange and red. Some were starting to fall already, as if a prelude to the news we'd received today. He had cancer. My dear, sweet Daddy. Daddy who had never done anything wrong in his entire life except smoke those damn cigarettes. He'd quit, for me, two years ago, but it hadn't been soon enough. The habit had caught up with him. The coughing and shortness of breath wasn't just a cold. It was cancer. The doctors claimed they could try aggressive treatments and removing the mass on his lung, but they gave us no false hope or promises. It was looking grim. Stage 4 was bad.After we'd gotten home from the doctor's office, still in a measurable amount of shock, Daddy had sat me down at the kitchen table. "All of the papers for the house are in the safe upstairs.

IanWithout trying to move a solitary muscle, I looked down at the blonde hair spread over my chest as if needing confirmation last night had happened. The sheet was wrapped around us in a tangled knot, her breathing even. Her thigh was wedged between mine, her arm laying limp across my chest. Her cheek rested right over my pounding heart. Never, not once, had I awakened to her in my arms, and Christ, I never wanted to open my eyes to empty sheets again. Holy hell. She was here, in bed with me.Sunlight streamed into the room from the window, the rays caressing her back in the early morning light. My scent mingled with that of her lilac and sea salt from the breeze. Surreal.She stretched against me, a moan escaping as she buried her face in my chest. Visions of rolling her over and making love to her half the morning had me growing hard. We needed to talk. I still hadn't said half the things I wanted to tell her. But she felt too good next to me to do anything but sink inside her

Five Years Ago-Age NineteenI curled up in a ball on my bed, wishing Dee didn't have a night class this evening. I badly needed a girl around. I didn't know if it was normal to discuss these things with a mother, since I'd never had one, but girls did discuss sex with their girlfriends, right? I was just glad Daddy didn't have a treatment today and had turned in early.How stupid of me to have romanticized the idea of sex. There wasn't a damn thing romantic about it. I had just decided at a party tonight to go ahead and get it over with. With some guy from my English Lit class. I was sick of the virgin moniker hanging over me and the opportunity arose. Everyone else had sex long before they were in their second year of college.The guy, Jason, had a lot more to drink than me, but neither of us were drunk. I'd heard the first time wasn't always good, but it had been terrible. He hadn't done much by way of foreplay, and the burning had been awful. Not wanting him to know it was my fir

SummerIan's mama came out to join me on the porch swing after supper and handed me a glass of sweet tea. I took it as she sat next to me, setting the swing in motion. I traced the condensation on the glass with my finger and stared at the yard. The air was humid and sticky, but now that the sun had set, it was comfortable. A slight breeze wafted off the water on the other side of the house, scented with brine. Crickets chirped in the long grass and the rustle of palm leaves crackled. Perfection.Ruth looked at me over the lip of her glass as she drank. "So, you and Ian, eh?"I offered a short, breathy laugh, still a little shocked myself. His parents had arrived late this morning. After they'd gotten settled and we'd sat down for lunch, Ian had flagged their attention, said he had something to tell them, and kissed me in front of everyone. Ian never did anything half-assed, that's for sure. Dee had clapped, Rick had shaken his head with a grin, and Ian's folks had spent the rest of

Summer"Will you sit down, please?" Dee waved an impatient hand at me. We were holed up together in the small bathroom upstairs, staring at the pregnancy test. I fidgeted, wringing my hands, pacing, making Dee more nervous. I couldn't help it. "Sorry." I sat on the edge of the tub. "You should be doing this with Rick." "No, I should be right here with you, so we can tell them after if I'm-" She let the statement hang for a moment. "How much longer?""Thirty seconds." I closed my eyes tight, blew out a breath.The week had gone by so quickly, like it usually did when we were here. An emotional roller coaster, but quick. Tomorrow, we'd be heading home. I couldn't help but wonder what would happen with Ian and I when we got back to Wylie. Would the dynamic change? We'd been in our own world here, but returning home was a slap of reality.And wow. Dee pregnant? It would be wonderful to be an auntie. A pang of jealousy and longing filled me. I wanted us to raise our children togeth