35 - Or What?JamesMia’s cheeks flushed into a beautiful pink color, looking away and squirming against my arm. I let her go, knowing her friends were present and she wouldn’t want us to look too suspicious. I hated that I couldn’t even touch her in the public eye. Even holding her hand or leaning too close would be forbidden.When I left after my meeting with the accountant, I hadn’t expected Damon Grant to call me, inviting me to his club on such a short notice. I couldn’t deny because Damon was my company’s biggest client, and I wanted to see its weekend opening. It had opened the week before, but he wanted to run a few things through in a meeting, which I was more than happy to do. Very few clients did the hands-on work or accepted most of our designs, demanding for a change, while Damon had always been analytical and asked questions. The last person I wanted to see there after exiting Damon’s office on the first floor was Mia. Especially in her lilac dress that looked as if it

Part Four“I love you as who you are.”37 - Be QuietMiaI dabbed my cheeks with a tissue for the last time and took a deep breath when James unlocked the door. He had calmed me down and demanded me to drink water from the bottle he offered. I thought I had creeped him out after sobbing like that, but he seemed closer to me than before, clutching my hand in his palm as we both stepped out of the room. He had promised that the cleaning crew would clean them and there was nothing to worry about. I trusted him. “Mia,” Emma whispered, her face pale as she looked between me and James. “I… wait—are you crying?” James didn’t let go of my hand when I tried to pull away. My heart thundered in my ribs, heat creeping up my neck. I didn’t know what to say. She must have already figured everything out. “No, I-I…” I looked closer at her face, her glistening eyes. “Are you crying?”She sniffed and looked away. Emma never cried. She was the type of person who’d say ‘Oh, well’ if she got into a ca

39 - Welcome HomeJamesOne of the worse things than being caught by their friend while making out with his daughter in his own kitchen was having a fucking boner when it happened. “Dad.” I winced when Mia pulled back, color slashing her cheeks. “You’re… you are standing, and you’re here?” I wished I could faint. Or have a heart attack. Anything at that point would work. Clyde looked like he was having a heart attack or another aneurysm, and I was worried. “Were you just kissing James, or was I seeing things?” Even his voice was barely a rasp, his knuckles tightening on the cane he was holding. Despite staying in the hospital for a couple of months, he looked healthy. “Would you believe me if I said you’re seeing things?” Mia asked, shuffling on her feet. I took a deep breath and met my friend’s eyes. “I was kissing Mia,” I answered, keeping my gaze on him, even though guilt and embarrassment made me want to look away. I didn’t regret anything. I should have talked to Clyde about

41 - Own GoodJamesSaying the words out loud felt like my skin was ripping apart and my body was on fire. The sound of my mother’s wail after the harsh smack kept echoing in my head. What horrified me the most was that mom was keeping it a secret for years wearing turtlenecks in summers and wearing heavy foundation when she wasn’t going anywhere.“H-he didn’t stop,” I managed to say through my gritted teeth. Her warm hands caressed my hand as if I deserved it. “I remember punching him. There was a lot of yelling and shouting. Mom locked herself in a room when he finally left the house to get more drunk in a bar. I followed him, getting into a serious fight until my mom picked me up.”I couldn’t meet her eyes.I chuckled grimly. “That was my Christmas, Mia. I grabbed a bottle—fuck, I don’t even remember what I had been drinking. I was just angry. At everyone. And then Mom scolded me the entire ride. Not that piece of shit who hit her—” I swallowed when her small fingers entwined with

43 - Happy BirthdayJamesI stared at the night lights of the small town that had become my home for the past couple of years. It wasn’t covered in snow anymore and winter’s harsh wind had turned to soft, cooling breeze in the evening. I trailed my finger on the glass, reminiscing about the time I had Mia pinned against it and made her come over and over again until she slumped in my arms, smiling at me with such a raw, giddy expression that I had taken her again on the floor. My throat tightened and I downed the whiskey, relishing in the sharp burn it offered. I deserved more than just that burn. I looked around the empty house and yanked my tie away, hating each breath I took. I paused on my way to glare at my drafting table scattered with blueprints and the design of new hospital in New York. Images of Eden, ex-dean of Saint Helena, flashed in my head. The numb, poker face of the freshmen who averted the cop’s gentle face when they prodded him with questions that no kid should ev