I should have believed you.
I never should have wanted more.
I never knew my heart could be so selfish.
Once my tears had dried, I made my way to the bed, and fell asleep.
I glared at the normal appearing young man sitting across from me.
"What's going on? Why did my sister block off all the portals to your house?"
He had noticed already?
"It's..." I trailed off, not sure how to explain.
"Look, Kara. You told me you wanted some space to 'figure things out' and I've tried to honor that. But that was a freaking year ago!" He leaned forward and grabbed my hand within his own. I winced at the sensation, hating the furious beating of my own heart. "What's going on?"
I pulled my hand back, ignoring his reluctance to release it. "Nothing." I knew he deserved an explanation. "Look, last year, when we... when I..." This was harder than I thought. "I did something stupid."
He reached out again, stopping his hand halfway to my face. "Are you okay?"
"Yes, I'm fine."
"Good." He sighed with relief. "What mistake did you make?"
I flushed with embarrassment. "I'm sure you'll find out. Just know that I'm sorry."
He was smiling at me, and I forced myself to ignore the emotion I thought I saw in his eyes. It was just my imagination, born from a longing deep within my heart. I had always wanted to see love in his eyes, so much so that I would see it whether it was there or not.
Demons couldn't love. He had told me so himself.
"Can you go?"
He chuckled. "I'm not really here."
"This is my dream. I would appreciate it if you went elsewhere."
He looked like he wanted to argue, but he held back his words. Standing up, he gave me a smile and simply replied, "I'll go. But we're not done talking about this. "
With that, he disappeared. I let out a groan, covering my face with my hands. I had forgotten he could enter my dreams. Yet another consequence of the blood contract we shared. If I had known the trouble I was inviting myself I wouldn't have ever entered into it with Valaac.
I laughed bitterly at myself. Who was I kidding? Even if I had known I would have done the same thing. That's the joy of being in love. Unconsciously rubbing my left shoulder, where his mark was etched into my skin, I closed my eyes and shut myself off from the world of dreams. After all, I had work in the morning, and I needed sleep.
My heart was breaking.
You pasted it back together.
But when I tried to give it to you.
It wasn't what you wanted.
"You look like crap!" Alice was smiling, but it didn't hide her concern even as she ordered me a drink from the bar.
"Thanks." My tone was dry.
"No, you know you look amazing, but did you not sleep or something?" She grinned and winked. "Maybe someone else was over last night?"
"You know that's not the case."
"A girl can hope." Alice grinned, handing me my bear as she sipped on her own cocktail. We went to find ourselves a table, walking past a slew of supernatural creatures. Demons, fairies, weres... all of them were here, most of them drunk. She and I were both witches, and allowed into the Magic Cauldron bar on Patron night, although Alice could barely be called a practicing witch. She performed some green magic in her garden, left out sugar water for fairies, fairly minimal stuff. Under normal circumstances she might not be considered powerful enough to mingle with the type that came here.
Not that anyone would be stupid enough to mess with her. It was well known that she was my friend. No one touched my friends.
We snagged a quiet empty corner in the bar, nodding silently at the pack of wolfish young men who winked at us two tables over.
"There's someone who might want to help you out with your 'sleepless nights' problem." Alice muttered in my ear. I cast a spell around our table to prevent us from being overheard, especially with werewolves nearby it never hurt to be too careful.
"He's not serious." I glanced over to the Mal, the alpha of the pack who was looking me over with a narrowed gaze. "He's hoping that buttering me up will give him an advantage when he presents his territorial dispute before the council."
"Ah yes, the almighty supernatural beings council." She rolled her eyes. "How is your job treating you?"
I took a sip from my drink. "It's a pain. If Loretta hadn't been such a brat, she would have been the witch's representative on the council and I could be running my own tarot shop."
"Oh, shut up, you would hate it. You never liked dealing with tourists."
"It might be preferable." I shook my head. "Today we were discussing mapping out ghost haunting rights. Do you know how nitpicking dead people can get? Ugh, I'm going to need a few of these." I took another long swig from my beer.
" You can always come work for me in the publishing business."
"Speaking of which..."
"Oops." Alice looked around for an escape route, but I cut her off.
"Why in Hell did you publish that drunken rant of a teen romance that I sent you?"
Alice shrugged. "It was actually really entertaining."
"You didn't tell me! Doesn't this kind of thing require all sorts of rewrites and paperwork?"
"I didn't want to bother you, so I just took care of it." She was grinning, but I could tell Alice was holding something back.
"You could have at least changed the name. Do you know how much trouble I could get into for publishing a demon's true name?"
"Eh, it wasn't even his full name." She looked me in the eye. "Besides, whatever suffering he gets from this, he deserves all of it and more."
"No. I helped you pick up the pieces a year ago when he broke your heart. Did I publish this secretly in hopes of getting a little revenge on that jerk? Maybe. You don't open up to many people, and you haven't even looked at a guy since you two stopped talking."
I couldn't help but sigh. "It wasn't really his fault, dear."
"Doesn't matter. I'm your best friend, therefore not only is it his fault but he must be punished."
"And what are you going to do when aforementioned 'punished' demon comes after me after he figures out what we did?"
Alice chuckled. "That's where your far superior witch powers come into play."
"You're crazy, you know that right?"
She clinked glasses with me. "Who isn't?"
We spent the night drinking, and I tried my best to put the book, and him, out of my mind.
I feel your presence in my dreams.Waiting just around the corner, hoping I will find you.But each time I look, you've already disappeared.I felt nervous the next day at work, unable to shake a sense of unease that hung around me since I had woken up. I felt guilty deep down. It wasn't really Varaac's fault that I had shut him out of my life. That I had made him intensely popular with teenage girls wanting to experiment with demon summoning. He had always been there for me. Supportive, caring, never hesitating to be by my side.I was the one who wanted something more.I sighed, stretching in the corner, feeling satisfaction as my spine made a loud cracking noise."Rough night?" I turned to the familiar voice. It was Mal, the werewolf alpha. His territory dispute was slotted to be discussed before the council today."Not too bad." I answered cautiously. I wasn't sure wh
Asking the same question over and overHoping for a different answerMy heart says one thingIt refuses to hear anything else."A whole week working with Varaac? How's that going?" Alice sipped her fruity cocktail, grimacing with sympathy.I sighed, leaning back in my chair. "Not that bad, actually. If anything, he's more effective than the last demon council member. At least he does more than just burn obscenities into the floor.""..." Alice stared at me silently."What?""Have you tried talking to him?""About what?" I tried to act innocently."About what happened a year ago.""No.""I mean, he seems to be pretty serious about talking it over with you.""No.""It might actually be healthy for you?""This coming from the woman who PUBLISHED my drunken ravings about him and sold it for profit?"
I say I love you a thousand waysBut not a single one is heard.Slowly even the loudest voiceCan be defeated by silence."I'm such an idiot." I muttered to myself, walking back to my apartment, rubbing my arms to keep myself warm against the chill.Why did I tell him to read the book?That was the last thing I should have done. The ending was the worst part. That night, filled with drunken inspiration, I put all my feelings onto paper, speaking them through the stale, cookie cutter heroine."Mary Sue trash." I complained, weirdly jealous of my own character. Why did she get to tell her demon crush her feelings? It made me want to blow something up with frustration."Hey there, Sweetheart."I paused. "I was just thinking I wanted to destroy something. What great timing."Mal laughed softly, walking out of the shadows. His left
My heart calls outAnd waits for an answerEven when it knows all that's left is silence.I woke up in a hospital bed.Ow. I silently looked over my body, wondering why everything hurt."Six broken ribs, a broken ankle, multiple sprains and bruising, and a collapsed lung." A soft voice answered my unspoken question. I looked up to see Alice sitting beside me, her eyes red. She looked like she hadn't slept in days."You look like crap." I smiled, wincing when I tried to laugh."You should look in the mirror." She answered back with a tired grin."How long?""Three days."Ugh."Stupid werewolves.""Well they won't be a problem anymore." Alice shrugged. "You had taken out over half the pack, and Baph and Varaac absolutely destroyed the rest.""How...?""Varaac was the one who found you. Apparently he can sense your location t
The words echo over and over in my heartHoping that you will hear them.If I write these words over and overMaybe they'll become my new reality."So you two are a couple now?" Alice cheered from her seat in the Magic Cauldron, waving her drink around.I sipped on water, being on an alcohol ban as is mixed with the meds I had to take as I healed up from the attack."Yeah, we are." Varaac was grinning, his arm draped casually around my shoulders. I found that since we had our discussion, his habit of casual contact had returned with a vengeance. Not that I minded. I leaned my head against his shoulder with a smile."So can I dismantle the blocks on the portals to your house?" Baph rolled her eyes as she looked at the two of us. "You both are way too dramatic, by the way.""Please." I smiled up at the demon at my side. "I don't think you have to block them anymore.""You still owe me two casserole dinners."<