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I lay there for a

I lay there for a long time in Derek’s arms as he spooned me like before.

I noticed this time that he quite conspicuously kept his pelvis from touching me.

I was glad.

Sort of.

…no, not really.

But I knew I couldn’t feel that thick, hard pressure against my body and hold back.

True to his word, he just held me. No touching, no caressing, no kissing, no nothing.

And I didn’t make a move on him… even though I knew what incredible delights lay beneath his clothes. Even though I knew I could just make the slightest motion, and then he would take it from there… and I could temporarily forget everything else, swept away by passion and ecstasy.

But my misery was enough to keep me in check.

Something Shanna had said kept echoing in my mind. I’m sure if she had known the effect it would have on me, she never would have said it… but it was as effective as a chastity belt.

At least I don’t tell some guy I love him and then fuck around behind his back.

So I never made a move.

It was the hardest
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