85. Roxie

I have ditched Berlarot before but I mean it this time.

I can’t keep having my emotions toyed with like that. What happened with Alpha Austin was dangerous. It was me making the decisions and talking the talk but the drive to send me down those stairs and throw myself at a man I’d never met.

That wasn’t me. I can be confident and sexual but it was like he turned those aspects of me up to full volume, removing my instinct to not die at the hands of a psychopath.

I’ve spent almost every hour since arriving on campus lusting after Alpha Dex and then a switch flicks and suddenly I want Austin? Berlarot is messing with me and it’s pissing me off. I don’t know much more of my life he is tampering with as even Felix seems to be cooling off

I can’t decide if the distance between Felix and I is a good or a bad thing as I lay on my bed with sad radio tunes matching my mood.

Seeing as I never really wanted him anyway it’s probably good. Then some days he randomly wraps his huge, solid arms